,*APT] #h - ,OP5 & ,CLOS$ ,FAMILIES 

#aiifaiif 

,PEOPLE 3 

,AU?OR 3 ,COL9 ,W>D 

,TEXT 3 

,*APT] ,V,I,I,I4 ,OP5 & ,CLOS$ ,FAMILIES 

  
  

,9 *OOS+ A P>TN] WE TRY BO? TO RETA9 ! RELATION%IPS WE HAVE 5JOY$ 9 *ILDHOOD1 & TO REC\P \RSELVES = FANTASIES :I* HAVE BE5 D5I$ US4 ,MATE-SELECTION ACCORD+LY BECOMES = MANY AN ATTEMPT TO CA/ A P>TICUL> P>T 9 A FANTASY PRODUCTION ( !IR [N1 & S9CE BO? P>TIES HAVE ! SAME 9T5TION BUT R>ELY QUITE ! SAME FANTASIES1 ! RESULT MAY WELL BE A DUEL ( RIVAL PRODUC]S4 ,!RE >E M51 AS ,/ANLEY ,SP5C] SAID ( HIMSELF1 :O NE$ TWO COMPLEM5T>Y WIVES1 & WOM5 :O NE$ TWO COMPLEM5T>Y HUSB&S1 OR AT LEA/ TWO COMPLEM5T>Y LOVE OBJECTS4 IF WE 9SI/ FIR/ ?AT ?IS IS IMMORAL OR 0UNFAI?FUL01 & SECOND ?AT %\LD IT OCCUR !RE IS AN OBLIGATION ON EA* LOVE-OBJECT TO 9SI/ ON EXCLUSIVE RI<TS1 WE M]ELY ADD UNNECESS>Y DIFFICULTIES TO A PROBLEM :I* MI<T HAVE PRES5T$ NONE1 OR AT LEA/ PRES5T$ FEW]1 IF ANYONE W]E P]MITT$ TO SOLVE IT 9 !IR [N WAY4  
  
  

,ALEX ,COM=T1 ,SEX 9 ,SOCIETY 

,ONE ESS5TIALLY AN>*I/ REVOLUTION ?AT HAS ADVANC$ 5ORM\SLY 9 \R [N DAY IS ! SEXUAL REVOLUTION4 ,IT IS AN>*I/ PRECISELY BECAUSE IT 9VOLVES D5Y+ ! AU?ORITY ( ! REGULATIONS LAID D[N BY ! /ATE & BY V>I\S RELIGI\S 5T]PRISES OV] ! ACTIVITIES ( ! 9DIVIDUAL4 ,& WE CAN CLAIM ?AT IT HAS ADVANC$1 NOT BECAUSE ( ! 0BREAKD[N0 ( ! FAMILY ?AT MORALI/S 7QUITE ]RONE\SLY7 SEE ALL >\ND !M1 BUT BECAUSE 9 ,WE/]N SOCIETY MORE & MORE PEOPLE HAVE DECID$ TO CONDUCT !IR SEXUAL LIVES AS !Y SEE BE/4 ,?OSE :O HAVE PROPHESI$ DREADFUL CONSEQU5CES AS A RESULT ( ! GREAT] SEXUAL FRE$OM :I* ! Y\NG ASS]T -- UNWANT$ BABIES1 V5]EAL DISEASE & SO ON -- >E USUALLY ! V]Y SAME PEOPLE :O SEEK ! FULFILLM5T ( !IR PROPHESIES BY OPPOS+ ! FREE AVAILABILITY TO ! Y\NG ( CONTRACEPTION & ! REMOVAL ( ! /IGMA & MY/IFICATION ?AT SURR\ND V5]EAL DISEASE4 

,! (FICIAL CODE ON SEXUAL MATT]S WAS BEQUEA!D TO ! /ATE BY ! ,*RI/IAN ,*UR*1 & HAS BE5 H>D] & H>D] TO JU/IFY ) ! DECL9E ( ! BELIEFS ON :I* IT WAS BAS$4 ,AN>*I/S1 FROM ,EMMA ,GOLDMAN TO ,ALEX ,COM=T1 HAVE OBS]V$ ! CONNECTION BETWE5 POLITICAL & SEXUAL REPRESSION &1 AL?\< ?OSE :O ?9K SEXUAL LIB]ATION IS NECESS>ILY GO+ TO LEAD TO POLITICAL & ECONOMIC LIB]ATION >E PROBABLY OPTIMI/IC1 IT C]TA9LY MAKES PEOPLE HAPPI]4 ,?AT !RE IS NO IMMUTABLE BASIS = SEXUAL CODES CAN BE SE5 FROM ! WIDE V>IETIES 9 ACCEPT$ BEHAVIOR & 9 LEGISLATION ON SEXUAL MATT]S AT DIFF]5T P]IODS & 9 DIFF]5T C\NTRIES4 ,MALE HOMOSEXUALITY BECAME A 0PROBLEM0 ONLY BECAUSE IT WAS ! SUBJECT ( LEGISLATION4 ,FEMALE HOMOSEXUALITY WAS NO PROBLEM BECAUSE ITS EXI/5CE WAS IGNOR$ BY 7MALE7 LEGISLATORS4 ,! LEGAL ANOMALIES >E SOMETIMES HIL>I\S3 0,:O CAN EXPLA9 JU/ :Y ANAL 9T]C\RSE IS LEGAL 9 ,SCOTL& BETWE5 MALE & FEMALE1 BUT ILLEGAL BETWE5 MALE & MALE8 ,:Y IS ANAL 9T]C\RSE ILLEGAL 9 ,5GL& BETWE5 MALE & FEMALE1 YET OKAY BETWE5 MALES IF BO? >E OV] #b#a80.<#h#h.> 

,! MORE ! LAW IS T9K]$ ) 9 ! EF=T TO MAKE IT MORE RATIONAL ! MORE ABSURDITIES >E REVEAL$4 ,DOES ?IS MEAN ?AT !RE >E NO RATIONAL CODES = SEXUAL BEHAVIOR8 ,( C\RSE NOT3 !Y SIMPLY GET BURI$ 9 ! IRRATIONALITIES OR DEVALU$ ?R\< ASSOCIATION ) IRRELEVANT PROHIBITIONS4 ,ALEX ,COM=T1 :O SEES SEX AS 0! HEAL?IE/ & MO/ IMPORTANT HUMAN SPORT0 SUGGE/S ?AT 0! ACTUAL CONT5T ( SEXUAL BEHAVIOR PROBABLY *ANGES MU* LESS BETWE5 CULTURES ?AN ! 9DIVIDUAL'S CAPACITY TO 5JOY IT )\T GUILT04 ,HE 5UNCIAT$ TWO MORAL 9JUNCTIONS OR COMM&M5TS ON SEXUAL BEHAVIOR3 0,?\ %ALT NOT EXPLOIT ANO!R P]SON'S FEEL+S10 & 0,?\ %ALT UND] NO CIRCUM/ANCES CAUSE ! BIR? ( AN UNWANT$ *ILD40.<#h#i.> ,HIS REF]5CE TO 0COMM&M5TS0 L$ ,PR(ESSOR ,MAURICE ,C>/AIRS TO TEASE HIM ) ! QUE/ION :Y1 AS AN AN>*I/1 ,COM=T WAS PRESCRIB+ RULES8 -- TO :I* HE REPLI$ ?AT A PHILOSOPHY ( FRE$OM DEM&$ HI<] /&>DS ( P]SONAL RESPONSIBILITY ?AN A BELIEF 9 AU?ORITY4 ,! LACK ( ORD9>Y PRUD5CE & *IVALRY :I* C\LD (T5 BE OBS]V$ 9 ADOLESC5T BEHAVIOR TODAY WAS1 HE SUGGE/$1 PRECISELY ! RESULT ( PRESCRIB+ A CODE ( *A/ITY :I* DID NOT MAKE S5SE 9/EAD ( PR9CIPLES :I* >E 0IMM$IATELY 9TELLIGIBLE & ACCEPTABLE TO ANY S5SIBLE Y\NG/]04 

,Y\ C]TA9LY DON'T HAVE TO BE AN AN>*I/ TO SEE ! MOD]N NUCLE> FAMILY AS A /RAITJACKET ANSW] TO ! FUNCTIONAL NE$S ( HOME-MAK+ & *ILD-RE>+ :I* IMPOSES 9TOL]ABLE /RA9S ON MANY ( ! PEOPLE TRAPP$ 9 IT4 ,$MUND ,LEA* REM>K$ ?AT 0F> FROM BE+ ! BASIS ( ! GOOD SOCIETY1 ! FAMILY1 ) ITS N>R[ PRIVACY & TAWDRY SECRETS1 IS ! S\RCE ( ALL \R DISCONT5TS04.<#i.> ,DAVID ,COOP] CALL$ IT 0! ULTIMATE & MO/ LE?AL GAS *AMB] 9 \R SOCIETY01 & ,JACQUETTA ,HAWKES SAID ?AT 0IT IS A =M MAK+ FE>FUL DEM&S ON ! HUMAN BE+S CAU<T UP 9 IT2 HEAVILY WEI<T$ = LONEL9ESS1 EXCESSIVE DEM&S1 /RA9 & FAILURE04.<#i#a.> ,OBVI\SLY IT SUITS SOME ( US AS ! BE/ WORK+ >RANGEM5T BUT \R SOCIETY MAKES NO PROVISION = ! O!RS1 :OSE NUMB]S Y\ CAN ASSESS BY ASK+ Y\RSELF ! QUE/ION3 0,H[ MANY HAPPY FAMILIES DO ,I KN[80 

,CONSID] ! CASE ( ,JOHN ,CITIZ54 ,ON ! /R5G? ( A FEW HAPPY EV5+S 9 ! DISCO!QUE1 HE & ,M>Y MAKE A CONTRACT ) ! /ATE &_/OR SOME RELIGI\S 5T]PRISE TO LIVE TOGE!R = LIFE & >E GIV5 A LIC5SE TO COPULATE4 ,ASSUM+ ?AT !Y SURM\NT ! PROBLEMS ( F9D+ SOME:]E TO LIVE & RAISE A FAMILY1 LOOK AT !M A FEW YE>S LAT]4 ,HE1 /RUGGL+ HOME FROM WORK EA* DAY1 SEES HIMSELF CAU<T 9 A TRAP4 ,%E FEELS ! SAME1 ! LONELY S+LE-H&$ H\SEWIFE1 *A9$ TO ! S9K & ! NAPPY-BUCKET4 ,& ! KIDS TOO1 9CREAS+LY AS ! YE>S GO BY1 FEEL TRAPP$4 ,:Y CAN'T ,MOM & ,DAD JU/ LEAVE US ALONE8 ,!RE IS NO NE$ TO GO ON ) ! SAGA BECAUSE Y\ KN[ IT ALL BACKW>D4 

,9 T]MS ( ! HAPP9ESS & FULFILLM5T ( ! 9DIVIDUALS 9VOLV$1 ! MOD]N FAMILY IS AN IMPROVEM5T ON ITS N9ETE5?-C5TURY PR$ECESSOR OR ON ! V>I\S 9/ITUTIONAL ALT]NATIVES DREAM$ UP BY AU?ORIT>IAN UTOPIANS & WE MI<T V]Y WELL >GUE ?AT TODAY !RE IS NO?+ TO PREV5T PEOPLE FROM LIV+ H[EV] !Y LIKE BUT1 9 FACT1 EV]Y?+ AB\T \R SOCIETY1 FROM ! ADV]TISEM5TS ON TELEVISION TO ! LAWS ( 9H]ITANCE IS BAS$ ON ! ASSUMPTION ( ! TI<T LITTLE CONSUM] UNIT ( ! NUCLE> FAMILY4 ,H\S+ IS AN OBVI\S EXAMPLE3 MUNICIPAL H\S+ MAKES NO PROVISION = NON/&>D UNITS & 9 ! PRIVATE SECTOR NO LOANS OR MORTGAGES >E AVAILABLE = COMMUNES4 

,! RI* CAN AVOID ! TRAP BY ! SIMPLE EXP$I5T ( PAY+ O!R PEOPLE TO RUN !IR H\SEHOLDS & RE> !IR *ILDR54 ,BUT = ! ORD9>Y FAMILY ! SY/EM MAKES DEM&S :I* V]Y MANY PEOPLE CANNOT MEET4 ,WE ACCEPT IT BECAUSE IT IS UNIV]SAL4 ,9DE$ ! ONLY EXAMPLES ?AT ,DR ,LEA* C\LD CITE :]E *ILDR5 0GR[ UP 9 L>G]1 MORE RELAX$ DOME/IC GR\PS C5T]$ ON ! COMMUNITY RA!R ?AN ON MO!R'S KIT*5' W]E ! ,ISRAELI KIBBUTZ OR ! ,*9ESE COMMUNE1 SO UBIQUIT\S HAS ! PATT]N BECOME4 ,BUT *ANGES >E COM+3 ! WOM5'S LIB]ATION MOVEM5T IS ONE REM9D] ?AT ! PRICE ( ! NUCLE> FAMILY IS ! SUBJUGATION ( WOM54 ,! COMMUNES OR JO9T H\SEHOLDS ?AT SOME Y\NG PEOPLE >E SETT+ UP >E NO D\BT P>TLY A REFLECTION ( ! NE$ TO %>E 9FLAT$ R5TS BUT >E MU* MORE A REACTION AGA9/ :AT !Y SEE AS ! /ULTIFY+ RIGID NATURE ( ! SMALL FAMILY UNIT4 

,! MY/IQUE ( BIOLOGICAL P>5?OOD RESULTS 9 SOME C\PLES LIV+ 9 DESP]ATE UNHAPP9ESS BECAUSE ( !IR 9F]TILITY :ILE O!RS HAVE *ILDR5 :O >E NEGLECT$ & UNWANT$4 ,IT ALSO GIVES RISE TO ! COMMON SITUATION ( P>5TS CL++ TO !IR *ILDR5 BECAUSE !Y HAVE SUNK SO MU* ( !IR EMOTIONAL CAPITAL 9 !M :ILE ! *ILDR5 DESP]ATELY WANT TO GET AWAY FROM !IR POSSESSIVE LOVE4 0,A SECURE HOME01 WRITES ,JOHN ,H>TWELL1 0(T5 MEANS A /IFL+ ATMOSPH]E :]E HUMAN RELATION%IPS >E TURN$ 9TO A P>ODY & :]E SIGNS ( CREATIVITY >E CRU%$ AS EVID5CE ( DEVIANCY40.<#i#b.> ,WE >E V]Y F> FROM ! K9D ( COMMUNITY 9 :I* *ILDR5 C\LD *OOSE :I* ( ! LOCAL P>5T-FIGURES !Y W\LD LIKE TO ATTA* !MSELVES TO BUT A NUMB] ( 9T]E/+ SUGGE/IONS >E 9 ! AIR1 ALL AIM+ AT LOOS5+ FAMILY TIES 9 ! 9T]E/S ( BO? P>5TS & *ILDR54 ,!RE IS ! IDEA ( ,PAUL & ,JEAN ,RITT] ( A NEI<BORHOOD 0*ILDR5'S H\SE0 S]V+ TW5TY-FIVE TO =TY FAMILIES1.<#i#c.> !RE IS ,PAUL ,GOODMAN'S NOTION ( A ,Y\? ,H\SE ON ! ANALOGY ( ?IS 9/ITUTION 9 SOME 0PRIMITIVE0 CULTURES1 & !RE IS ,T$DY ,GOLD'S SUGGE/$ ,MULTIPLE ,FAMILY ,H\S+ ,UNIT4.<#i#d.> ,!SE IDEAS >E NOT BAS$ ON ANY REJECTION ( \R RESPONSIBILITY T[>DS ! Y\NG2 !Y 9VOLVE %>+ ?IS RESPONSIBILITY ?R\<\T ! COMMUNITY & ACCEPT+ ! PR9CIPLE ?AT1 AS ,KROPOTK9 PUT IT1 ALL *ILDR5 >E \R *ILDR54 ,!Y ALSO IMPLY GIV+ *ILDR5 !MSELVES RESPONSIBILITIES NOT ONLY = !MSELVES BUT TO ! COMMUNITY1 :I* IS EXACTLY :AT \R FAMILY /RUCTURE FAILS TO DO4 

,P]SONAL NE$S & ASPIRATIONS V>Y SO GREATLY ?AT IT IS AS FATU\S TO SUGGE/ /]EOTYP$ ALT]NATIVES AS IT IS TO RECOMM5D UNIV]SAL CON=MITY TO ! EXI/+ PATT]N4 ,AT ONE 5D ( ! SCALE IS ! W>P+ ( ! *ILD BY ! ACCID5T ( P>5?OOD1 EI!R BY POSSESSIV5ESS OR BY ! P]PETUATION ( A FAMILY SYNDROME ( 9ADEQUACY & 9COMPET5CE4 ,AT ! O!R 5D IS ! EMOTIONAL /ULTIFICATION ( ! *ILD ?R\< A LACK ( P]SONAL ATTA*M5TS 9 9/ITUTIONAL *ILD C>E4 ,WE ALL KN[ CONV5TIONAL H\SEHOLDS P]MEAT$ ) CASUAL AFFECTION :]E DOME/IC *ORES & RESPONSIBILITIES >E %>$1 :ILE WE CAN READILY IMAG9E A COMMUNAL H\SEHOLD 9 :I* ! WOM5 W]E DRUDGES COLLECTIVELY 9/EAD ( 9DIVIDUALLY & 9 :I* A *ILD :O WAS NOT V]Y ATTRACTIVE OR ASS]TIVE WAS NOT SO MU* LEFT ALONE AS NEGLECT$4 ,MORE IMPORTANT ?AN ! /RUCTURE ( ! FAMILY >E ! EXPECTATIONS ?AT PEOPLE HAVE ( !IR ROLES 9 IT4 ,! DOME/IC TYRANT ( ! ,VICTORIAN FAMILY WAS ABLE TO EX]CISE HIS TYRANNY ONLY BECAUSE ! O!RS W]E PREP>$ TO PUT UP ) IT4 

,!RE IS AN OLD SLOGAN AMONG PROGRESSIVE $UCATORS1 ,HAVE'EM1 ,LOVE'EM & ,LEAVE' EM ,ALONE4 ,?IS AGA9 IS NOT URG+ NEGLECT1 BUT IT DOES EMPHASIZE ?AT HALF ! P]SONAL MIS]IES & FRU/RATIONS ( ADOLESC5TS & ( ! ADULTS !Y BECOME >E DUE TO ! 9SIDI\S PRESSURES ON ! 9DIVIDUAL TO DO :AT O!R PEOPLE ?9K IS APPROPRIATE = HIM4 ,AT ! SAME TIME ! CONT9UAL EXT5SION ( ! PROCESSES ( =MAL $UCATION DELAYS EV5 FUR!R ! GRANT+ ( REAL RESPONSIBILITY TO ! Y\NG4 ,ANY TEA*] 9 FUR!R $UCATION WILL TELL Y\ ( ! DIFF]5CE BETWE5 SIXTE5-YE>-OLDS :O >E AT WORK & ATT5D P>T-TIME VOCATIONAL C\RSES & ?OSE ( ! SAME AGE :O >E /ILL 9 FULL-TIME $UCATION4 ,9 ?OSE B5I<T$ C\NTRIES :]E Y\NG *ILDR5 >E /ILL ALL[$ TO WORK Y\ NOTICE NOT ONLY ! ELEM5T ( EXPLOITATION BUT ALSO ! MATURITY ?AT GOES ) UND]TAK+ FUNCTIONAL RESPONSIBILITIES 9 ! REAL WORLD4 

,! Y\NG >E CAU<T 9 A T5D] TRAP3 ! AGE ( PUB]TY & ! AGE ( M>RIAGE 7S9CE \R SOCIETY DOES NOT READILY P]MIT EXP]IM5TAL ALT]NATIVES YET7 GO D[N :ILE1 AT ! SAME TIME1 ACCEPTANCE 9TO ! ADULT WORLD IS CONT9UALLY DEF]R$ -- DESPITE ! L[]+ ( ! =MAL AGE ( MAJORITY4 ,NO WOND] MANY ADULTS APPE> TO BE CA/ 9 A MOLD ( IMMATURITY4 ,9 FAMILY LIFE WE HAVE NOT YET DEVELOP$ A G5U9ELY P]MISSIVE SOCIETY BUT SIMPLY ONE 9 :I* IT IS DIFFICULT TO GR[ UP4 ,ON ! O!R H&1 ! FACT ?AT = A M9ORITY ( Y\NG PEOPLE -- A M9ORITY :I* IS 9CREAS+ ! /]EOTYPES ( SEXUAL BEHAVIOR & SEXUAL ROLES :I* CONF9$ & OPPRESS$ !IR ELD]S = C5TURIES HAVE SIMPLY BECOME IRRELEVANT1 WILL C]TA9LY BE SE5 9 ! FUTURE AS ONE ( ! POSITIVE A*IEVEM5TS ( \R AGE4 

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