,ASSORT$ ,LETT]S #agih ,PEOPLE 3 ,AU?OR 3 ,M>Y ,WOLL/ONECRAFT ,SECTIONS 7,T,O,C7 3 O ,PREFACE #c ,WORDS2 #a1#g#i#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #a #aa ,WORDS2 #fgf ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #b #bea ,WORDS2 #a1#d#h#c ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #c #cg ,WORDS2 #b1#i#g ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #d #dhe ,WORDS2 #b1#h#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #e #cfb ,WORDS2 #b1#b#f#c ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #f #cgd ,WORDS2 #b1#a#e#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #g #cca ,WORDS2 #b1#a#b#f ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #h #dhg ,WORDS2 #c1#f#c ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #i #aei ,WORDS2 #icf ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #a #ebb ,WORDS2 #b1#i#i#f ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #aa #dad ,WORDS2 #b1#c#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ab #big ,WORDS2 #a1#f#e#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ac #ccd ,WORDS2 #a1#i#c ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ad #cdb ,WORDS2 #a1#i#d#a ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ae #cdd ,WORDS2 #b1#a#h ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #af #aii ,WORDS2 #a1#a#c#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ag #b ,WORDS2 #a1#a#f#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ah #afi ,WORDS2 #ieg ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ai #abc ,WORDS2 #gc ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #b #eba ,WORDS2 #c1#a#g#f ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ba #dd ,WORDS2 #b1#e#c#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bb #cga ,WORDS2 #b1#b#d#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bc #dcg ,WORDS2 #b1#e#f#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bd #ecc ,WORDS2 #c1#c#a ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #be #cff ,WORDS2 #b1#h#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bf #ecf ,WORDS2 #c1#i#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bg #dgb ,WORDS2 #b1#h#c#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bh #de ,WORDS2 #b1#c#e#d ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bi #efh ,WORDS2 #c1#c#f#g ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #c #ebc ,WORDS2 #b1#i#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ca #fa ,WORDS2 #c1#c#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cb #eab ,WORDS2 #c1#d#c ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cc #cd ,WORDS2 #a1#g#f#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cd #bha ,WORDS2 #a1#g#i#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ce #fce ,WORDS2 #c1#f#c#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cf #fb ,WORDS2 #c1#c#i#a ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cg #$h ,WORDS2 #c1#f ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #* #d ,WORDS2 #b1#b#e#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ci #aee ,WORDS2 #hhf ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #d #*h ,WORDS2 #b1#c#e#f ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #da #ii ,WORDS2 #fac ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #db #bfh ,WORDS2 #a1#e#f#h ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dc #ab ,WORDS2 #hhi ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dd #a1#a#c ,WORDS2 #f1#e#i#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #de #dba ,WORDS2 #b1#d#c#g ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #df #ahc ,WORDS2 #a1#a#a#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dg #be ,WORDS2 #a1#d#d#i ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dh #cfc ,WORDS2 #b1#a#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #di #c* ,WORDS2 #a1#i#b#a ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #e #cbg ,WORDS2 #a1#i#e#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ea #aid ,WORDS2 #a1#a#c#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #eb #bbg ,WORDS2 #a1#c#c#a ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ec #bah ,WORDS2 #a1#b#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #$ #bhf ,WORDS2 #a1#g#c ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ee #ehb ,WORDS2 #c1#d#f#b ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ef #cdg ,WORDS2 #b1#a ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #eg #bg ,WORDS2 #a1#b#d#g ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #eh #*f ,WORDS2 #b1#a#i#h ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ei #acb ,WORDS2 #if ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #f #eba ,WORDS2 #c1#a#h#g ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fa #bdb ,WORDS2 #a1#e#b#h ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fb #cih ,WORDS2 #b1#b#g#g ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fc #abd ,WORDS2 #gdc ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fd #df ,WORDS2 #b1#g#e#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fe #$c ,WORDS2 #c1#b#c#h ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ff #abh ,WORDS2 #gdc ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #b1 ,LETT] #fg #fhh ,WORDS2 #c1#i#c#e ,*>ACT]S O ,VOLUME #b1 ,LETT] #fh #eca ,WORDS2 #b1#i#g#g ,*>ACT]S ,SECTIONS 7,CONT5T7 3 O ,PREFACE ,! FOLL[+ ,LETT]S MAY POSSIBLY BE F\ND TO CONTA9 ! F9E/ EXAMPLES ( ! LANGUAGE ( S5TIM5T & PASSION EV] PRES5T$ TO ! WORLD4 ,!Y BE> A /RIK+ RESEMBLANCE TO ! CELEBRAT$ ROMANCE ( ,W]T]1 ?\< ! 9CID5TS TO :I* !Y RELATE >E ( A V]Y DIFF]5T CA/4 ,PROBABLY ! READ]S TO :OM ,W]T] IS 9CAPABLE ( AF=D+ PLEASURE1 WILL RECEIVE NO DELIISON1 !SE ,LETT]S WILL BE ADMITT$ TO HAVE ! SUP]IORITY OV] ! FICTION ( ,GOE!4 ,!Y >E ! (FSPR+ ( A GL[+ IMAG9ATION1 & A HE>T P5ETRAT$ ) ! PASSION IT ESSAYS TO DESCRIBE4 ,TO ! S]IES ( LETT]S CON/ITUT+ ! PR9CIPAL >TICLE 9 !SE TWO VOLUMES1 >E ADD$ V>I\S PIECES1 NONE ( :I*1 IT IS HOP$1 WILL BE F\ND DISCR$ITABLE TO ! TAL5TS ( ! AU?OR4 ,! SLI$ TO BE AT ONCE A JU/ MONUM5T TO ! S9C]ITY ( HIS FRI5D%IP1 & A VALUABLE & 9T]E/+ SPECIM5 ( ! M9D ( ! WRIT]4 ,! ,LETT] ON ! ,PRES5T ,*>ACT] ( ! ,FR5* ,NATION1 ! ,EXTRACT ( ! ,CAVE ( ,FANCY1 A ,TALE1 & ! ,H9TS = ! ,SECOND ,P>T ( ! ,RI$ 9 ! ,MON?LY ,MAGAZ9E = ,APRIL LA/1 & IS ! ONLY PIECE 9 ?IS COLLECTION :I* HAS PREVI\SLY F\ND ITS WAY TO ! PRESS4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #a ,TWO O',CLOCK4 ,MY DE> LOVE1 AFT] MAK+ MY >RANGEM5TS = \R SNUG D9N] TO-DAY1 ,I HAVE BE5 TAK5 BY /ORM1 & OBLIG$ TO PROMISE TO D9E1 AT AN E>LY H\R1 ) ! ,MISS ----S1 ! ONLY DAY !Y 9T5D TO PASS H]E4 ,I %ALL H[EV] LEAVE ! KEY 9 ! DOOR1 & HOPE TO F9D Y\ AT MY FIRE-SIDE :5 ,I RETURN1 AB\T EI ,I OBEY AN EMOTION ( MY HE>T1 :I* MADE ME ?9K ( WI%+ !E1 MY LOVE1 GOOD-NICELY IMAG9E ) :AT PLEASURE ,I ANTICIPATE ! DAY1 :5 WE >E TO BEG9 ALMO/ TO LIVE TOGE!R2 & Y\ W\LD SMILE TO HE> H[ MANY PLANS ( EMPLOYM5T ,I HAVE 9 MY HEAD1 N[ ?AT ,I AM CONFID5T MY HE>T HAS F\ND PEACE 9 Y\R BOSOM4--,*]I% ME ) ?AT DIGNIFI$ T5D]NESS1 :I* ,I HAVE ONLY F\ND 9 Y\2 & Y\R [N DE> GIRL WILL TRY TO KEEP UND] A QUICKNESS ( FEEL+1 ?AT HAS SOMETIMES GIV5 Y\ PA9--,YES1 ,I WILL BE GOOD1 ?AT ,I MAY DES]VE TO BE HAPPY2 & :IL/ Y\ LOVE ME1 ,I CANNOT AGA9 FALL 9TO ! MIS]ABLE /ATE1 :I* R5D]$ LIFE A BURD5 ALMO/ TOO HEAVY TO BE BORNE4 ,BUT1 GOOD-NIGA91 GL[+ ) GRATITUDE TO ,HEAV51 & AFFECTION TO Y\4 ,I LIKE ! WORD AFFECTION1 BECAUSE IT SIGNIFIES SOME?+ HABITUAL2 & WE >E SOON TO MEET1 TO TRY :E!R WE HAVE M9D 5\< TO KEEP \R HE>TS W>M4 "9 "9 "9 "9 ,I WILL BE AT ! B>RI] A LITTLE AFT] T5 O'CLOCK TO-MORR[.<#d-,A.>4--,Y\RS-- O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #c ,W$NESDAY ,MORN+4 ,Y\ HAVE (T5 CALL$ ME1 DE> GIRL1 BUT Y\ W\LD N[ SAY GOOD1 DID Y\ KN[ H[ V]Y ATT5TIVE ,I HAVE BE5 TO ! ---- EV] S9CE ,I CAME TO ,P>IS4 ,I AM NOT H[EV] GO+ TO TR\BLE Y\ ) ! ACC\NT1 BECAUSE ,I LIKE TO SEE Y\R EYES PRAISE ME2 &1 ,MILTON 9S9UATES1 ?AT1 DUR+ SU* RECITALS1 !RE >E 9T]RUPTIONS1 NOT UNGRATEFUL TO ! HE>T1 :5 ! HONEY ?AT DROPS FROM ! LIPS IS NOT M]ELY WORDS4 ,YET1 ,I %ALL NOT 7LET ME TELL Y\ BE=E !SE PEOPLE 5T]1 TO =CE ME TO HUDDLE AWAY MY LETT]7 BE CONT5T ) ONLY A KISS ( DUTY--Y\ MU/ BE GLAD TO SEE ME--BECAUSE Y\ >E GLAD--OR ,I WILL MAKE LOVE TO ! %ADE ( ,MIRABEAU1 TO :OM MY HE>T CONT9UALLY TURN$1 :IL/ ,I WAS TALK+ ) ,MADAME ----1 =CIBLY TELL+ ME1 ?AT IT WILL EV] HAVE SUFFICI5T W>M? TO LOVE1 :E!R ,I WILL OR NOT1 S5TIM5T1 ?\< ,I SO HI FROM IT--&1 IF ,I HAD NOT BEGUN TO =M A NEW !ORY RESPECT+ M51 ,I %\LD1 9 ! VANITY ( MY HE>T1 HAVE IMAG9$ ?AT ,I C\LD HAVE MADE SOME?+ ( HIS----IT WAS COMPOS$ ( SU* MAT]IALS--,HU%6 H]E !Y COME--& LOVE FLIES AWAY 9 ! TW9KL+ ( AN EYE1 LEAV+ A LITTLE BRU% ( HIS W+ ON MY PALE *EEKS4 ,I HOPE TO SEE ,DR4 ---- ?IS MORN+2 ,I AM GO+ TO ,MR4 ----'S TO MEET HIM4 ----1 & SOME O!RS1 >E 9VIT$ TO D9E ) US TO-DAY2 & TO-MORR[ ,I AM TO SP5D ! DAY ) ----4 ,I %ALL PROBABLY NOT BE ABLE TO RETURN TO ---- TO-MORR[2 BUT IT IS NO MATT]1 BECAUSE ,I MU/ TAKE A C>RIAGE1 ,I HAVE SO MANY BOOKS1 ?AT ,I IMM$IATELY WANT1 TO TAKE ) ME4--,ON ,FRIDAY !N ,I %ALL EXPECT Y\ TO D9E ) ME--&1 IF Y\ COME A LITTLE BE=E D9N]1 IT IS SO LONG S9CE ,I HAVE SE5 Y\1 Y\ WILL NOT BE SCOLD$ BY Y\RS AFFECTIONATELY O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #d ,FRIDAY ,MORN+ .<,SEPTEMB]4.>.<#g-,A.> ,A MAN1 :OM A LETT] FROM ,MR4 ---- PREVI\SLY ANN\NC$1 CALL$ H]E YE/]DAY = ! PAYM5T ( A DRAFT2 &1 AS HE SEEM$ DISAPPO9T$ AT NOT F9D+ Y\ AT HOME1 ,I S5T HIM TO ,MR4 ----4 ,I HAVE S9CE SE5 HIM1 & HE TELLS ME ?AT HE HAS SETTL$ ! BUS9ESS4 ,SO MU* = BUS9ESS6--,MAY ,I V5TURE TO TALK A LITTLE LONG] AB\T LESS WEIE Y\8--,I HAVE BE5 FOLL[+ Y\ ALL ALONG ! ROAD ?IS COM=TLESS WEA!R2 =1 :5 ,I AM ABS5T FROM ?OSE ,I LOVE1 MY IMAG9ATION IS AS LIVELY1 AS IF MY S5SES HAD NEV] BE5 GRATIFI$ BY !IR PRES5CE--,I WAS GO+ TO SAY C>ESSES--& :Y %\LD ,I NOT8 ,I HAVE F\ND \T ?AT ,I HAVE MORE M9D ?AN Y\1 9 ONE RESPECT2 BECAUSE ,I CAN1 )\T ANY VIOL5T EF=T ( REASON1 F9D FOOD = LOVE 9 ! SAME OBJECT1 MU* LONG] ?AN Y\ CAN4--,! WAY TO MY S5SES IS ?R\< MY HE>T2 BUT1 =GIVE ME6 ,I ?9K !RE IS SOMETIMES A %ORT] CUT TO Y\RS4 ,) N9ETY-N9E M5 \T ( A HUNDR$1 A V]Y SUFFICI5T DA% ( FOLLY IS NECESS>Y TO R5D] A WOMAN PIQUANTE1 A S(T WORD = DESIRABLE2 &1 BEYOND !SE CASUAL EBULLITIONS ( SYMPA?Y1 FEW LOOK = 5JOYM5T BY FO/]+ A PASSION 9 !IR HE>TS4 ,ONE REASON1 9 %ORT1 :Y ,I WI% MY :OLE SEX TO BECOME WIS]1 IS1 ?AT ! FOOLI% ONES MAY NOT1 BY !IR PRETTY FOLLY1 ROB ?OSE :OSE S5SIBILITY KEEPS D[N !IR VANITY1 ( ! FEW ROSES ?AT AF=D !M SOME SOLACE 9 ! ?ORNY ROAD ( LIFE4 ,I DO NOT KN[ H[ ,I FELL 9TO !SE REFLECTIONS1 EXCEPT+ ONE ?\ATIONS W]E NECESS>Y TO W>M Y\R AFFECTION4--,( LATE1 WE >E ALWAYS SEP>AT+4--,CRACK6--CRACK6--& AWAY Y\ GO4--,?IS JOKE WE>S ! SALL[ CA/ ( ?\S HAVE F\ND !IR WAY 9TO MY EYES1 ?AT L+] !RE1 :IL/ A GL[ ( T5D]NESS AT MY HE>T :ISP]S ?AT Y\ >E ONE ( ! BE/ CREATURES 9 ! WORLD4--,P>DON !N ! VAG>IES ( A M9D1 ?AT HAS BE5 ALMO/ 0CRAZ$ BY C>E10 AS WELL AS 0CROSS$ 9 HAPLESS LOVE10 & BE> ) ME A LITTLE LONG]6--,:5 WE >E SETTL$ 9 ! C\NTRY TOGE!R1 MORE DUTIES WILL OP5 BE=E ME1 & MY HE>T1 :I* N[1 TREMBL+ 9TO PEACE1 IS AGITAT$ BY EV]Y EMOTION ?AT AWAK5S ! REMEMBRANCE ( OLD GRIEFS1 WILL LE>N TO RE/ ON Y\RS1 ) ?AT DIGNITY Y\R *>ACT]1 NOT TO TALK ( MY [N1 DEM&S4 ,TAKE C>E ( Y\RSELF--& WRITE SOON TO Y\R [N GIRL 7Y\ MAY ADD DE>1 IF Y\ PLEASE7 :O S9C]ELY LOVES Y\1 & WILL TRY TO CONV9CE Y\ ( IT1 BY BECOM+ HAPPI]4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #e ,SUNDAY ,NIT AFFECTIONATE4 ,EV] S9CE Y\ LA/ SAW ME 9CL9$ TO FA9T1 ,I HAVE FELT SOME G5TLE TWIT*ES1 :I* MAKE ME BEG9 TO ?9K1 ?AT ,I AM N\RI%+ A CREATURE :O WILL SOON BE S5SIBLE ( MY C>E4--,?IS ?\E TO HAVE A MUTUAL 9T]E/1 Y\ KN[4 ,YE/]DAY--DO NOT SMILE6--F9D+ ?AT ,I HAD HURT MYSELF BY LIFT+ PRECIPITATELY A L>GE LOG ( WOOD1 ,I SAT D[N 9 AN AGONY1 TILL ,I FELT ?OSE SAID TWIT*ES AGA94 ,>E Y\ V]Y BUSY8 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,SO Y\ MAY RECKON ON ITS BE+ F9I%$ SOON1 ?\< NOT BE=E Y\ COME HOME1 UNLESS Y\ >E DETA9$ LONG] ?AN ,I N[ ALL[ MYSELF TO BELIEVE Y\ WILL4-- ,BE ?AT AS IT MAY1 WRITE TO ME1 MY BE/ LOVE1 & BID ME BE PATI5T--K9DLY--& ! EXPRESSIONS ( K9DNESS WILL AGA9 BEGUILE ! TIME1 AS SWEETLY AS !Y HAVE DONE TO-NIE ( Y\RSELF1 & REMEMB] ) T5D]NESS Y\R AFFECTIONATE "9 "9 "9 "9 ,I AM GO+ TO RE/ V]Y HAPPY1 & Y\ HAVE MADE ME SO4--,?IS IS ! K9DE/ GOOD-NITICUL> ACC\NT4-- ,YET ,I AM NOT ANGRY ) !E1 MY LOVE1 = ,I ?9K ?AT IT IS A PRO( ( /UPIDITY1 & LIKEWISE ( A MILK-&-WAT] AFFECTION1 :I* COMES TO ! SAME ?+1 :5 ! TEMP] IS GOV]N$ BY A SQU>E & COMPASS4--,!RE IS NO?+ PICTURESQUE 9 ?IS /RAIT B\ND TO !E2 BUT1 IT IS NOT TO ?Y MONEY-GETT+ FACE1 ?\< ,I CANNOT BE S]I\SLY DISPLEAS$ ) ! EX]TION :I* 9CREASES MY E/EEM1 OR RA!R IS :AT ,I %\LD HAVE EXPECT$ FROM ?Y *>ACT]4--,NO2 ,I HAVE ?Y HONE/ C\NT5ANCE BE=E ME--,POP--RELAX$ BY T5D]NESS2 A LITTLE--LITTLE W\ND$ BY MY :IMS2 & ?Y EYES GLI/5+ ) SYMPA?Y4--,?Y LIPS !N FEEL S(T] ?AN S(T--& ,I RE/ MY *EEK ON ?9E1 =GETT+ ALL ! WORLD4--,I HAVE NOT LEFT ! HUE ( LOVE \T ( ! PICTURE--! ROSY GL[2 & FANCY HAS SPREAD IT OV] MY [N *EEKS1 ,I BELIEVE1 = ,I FEEL !M BURN+1 :IL/ A DELICI\S TE> TREMBLES 9 MY EYE1 ?AT W\LD BE ALL Y\R [N1 IF A GRATEFUL EMOTION DIRECT$ TO ! ,FA!R ( NATURE1 :O HAS MADE ME ?US ALIVE TO HAPP9ESS1 DID NOT GIVE MORE W>M? TO ! S5TIM5T IT DIVIDES--,I MU/ PAUSE A MOM5T4 ,NE$ ,I TELL Y\ ?AT ,I AM TRANQUIL AFT] WRIT+ ?US8--,I DO NOT KN[ :Y1 BUT ,I HAVE MORE CONFID5CE 9 Y\R AFFECTION1 :5 ABS5T1 ?AN PRES5T2 NAY1 ,I ?9K ?AT Y\ MU/ LOVE ME1 =1 9 ! S9C]ITY ( MY HE>T LET ME SAY IT1 ,I BELIEVE ,I DES]VE Y\R T5D]NESS1 BECAUSE ,I AM TRUE1 & HAVE A DEGREE ( S5SIBILITY ?AT Y\ CAN SEE & RELI%4 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #g ,SUNDAY ,MORN+ .<,DECEMB] #b#i4.> ,Y\ SEEM TO HAVE TAK5 UP Y\R ABODE AT ,H----4 ,PRAY SIR6 :5 DO Y\ ?9K ( COM+ HOME8 OR1 TO WRITE V]Y CONSID]ATELY1 :5 WILL BUS9ESS P]MIT Y\8 ,I %ALL EXPECT 7AS ! C\NTRY PEOPLE SAY 9 ,5GL&7 ?AT Y\ WILL MAKE A P[] ( MONEY TO 9DEMNIFY ME = Y\R ABS5CE4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,WELL6 BUT1 MY LOVE1 TO ! OLD /ORY--AM ,I TO SEE Y\ ?IS WEEK1 OR ?IS MON?8--,I DO NOT KN[ :AT Y\ >E AB\T--=1 AS Y\ DID NOT TELL ME1 ,I W\LD NOT ASK ,MR4 ----1 :O IS G5]ALLY PRETTY COMMUNICATIVE4 ,I LONG TO SEE ,MRS4 ------2 NOT TO HE> FROM Y\1 SO DO NOT GIVE Y\RSELF AIRS1 BUT TO GET A LETT] FROM ,MR4 ----4 ,& ,I AM HALF ANGRY ) Y\ = NOT 9=M+ ME :E!R %E HAD BR\E NOT ! H&SOME/ ( !IR K9D4 ,BE NOT TOO ANXI\S TO GET MONEY6--= NO?+ WOR? HAV+ IS TO BE PUR*AS$4 ,GOD BLESS Y\4 ,Y\RS AFFECTIONATELY O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #h ,MONDAY ,NI ,MY BE/ LOVE1 Y\R LETT] TO-NITICUL>LY GRATEFUL TO MY HE>T1 DEPRESS$ BY ! LETT]S ,I RECEIV$ BY ----1 = HE BR\CEL ( BOOKS DIRECT$ TO ,MR4 ------ WAS = ME4 ,MR4 ------'S LETT] WAS LONG & V]Y AFFECTIONATE2 BUT ! ACC\NT HE GIVES ME ( HIS [N AFFAIRS1 ?\< HE OBVI\SLY MAKES ! BE/ ( !M1 HAS VEX$ ME4 ,A MELAN*OLY LETT] FROM MY SI/] ------ HAS ALSO H>RASS$ MY M9D--?AT FROM MY BRO!R W\LD HAVE GIV5 ME S9C]E PLEASURE2 BUT = -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,!RE IS A SPIRIT ( 9DEP5D5CE 9 HIS LETT]1 ?AT WILL PLEASE Y\2 & Y\ %ALL SEE IT1 :5 WE >E ONCE MORE OV] ! FIRE TOGE!R4--,I ?9K ?AT Y\ W\LD HAIL HIM AS A BRO!R1 ) ONE ( Y\R T5D] LOOKS1 :5 Y\R HE>T NOT ONLY GIVES A LU/] TO Y\R EYE1 BUT A DANCE ( PLAYFULNESS1 ?AT HE W\LD MEET ) A GL[ HALF MADE UP ( BA%FULNESS1 & A DESIRE TO PLEASE !----:]E %ALL ,I F9D A WORD TO EXPRESS ! RELATION%IP :I* SUBSI/S BETWE5 US8--,%ALL ,I ASK ! LITTLE TWIT*]8--,BUT ,I HAVE DROPT HALF ! S5T5CE ?AT WAS TO TELL Y\ H[ MU* HE W\LD BE 9CL9$ TO LOVE ! MAN LOV$ BY HIS SI/]4 ,I HAVE BE5 FANCY+ MYSELF SITT+ BETWE5 Y\1 EV] S9CE ,I BEGAN TO WRITE1 & MY HE>T HAS LEAP$ AT ! ?\ATION1 IF Y\ DID NOT LOVE ?OSE ,I LOVE4 ,!RE WAS SO MU* CONSID]ATE T5D]NESS 9 Y\R EPI/LE TO-NI] TO ME1 IT HAS MADE ME =CIBLY FEEL H[ V]Y DE> Y\ >E TO ME1 BY *>M+ AWAY HALF MY C>ES4 ,Y\RS AFFECTIONATELY O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #i ,TUESDAY ,MORN+ .<,DECEMB] #c#a4.> ,?\< ,I HAVE JU/ S5T A LETT] (F1 YET1 AS CAPTA9 ---- (F]S TO TAKE ONE1 ,I AM NOT WILL+ TO LET HIM GO )\T A K9D GREET+1 BECAUSE TRIFLES ( ?IS SORT1 )\T HAV+ ANY EFFECT ON MY M9D1 DAMP MY SPIRITS3--& Y\1 ) ALL Y\R /RUGGLES TO BE MANLY1 HAVE SOME ( ?IS SAME S5SIBILITY4--,DO NOT BID IT BEGONE1 = ,I LOVE TO SEE IT /RIV+ TO MA/] Y\R FEATURES2 BESIDES1 !SE K9D ( SYMPA?IES >E ! LIFE ( AFFECTION3 & :Y1 9 CULTIVAT+ \R UND]/&+S1 %\LD WE TRY TO DRY UP !SE SPR+S ( PLEASURE1 :I* GU% \T TO GIVE A FRE%NESS TO DAYS BR[N$ BY C>E6 ,! BOOKS S5T TO ME >E SU* AS WE MAY READ TOGE!R2 SO ,I %ALL NOT LOOK 9TO !M TILL Y\ RETURN2 :5 Y\ %ALL READ1 :IL/ ,I M5D MY /OCK+S4 ,Y\RS TRULY O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #a ,W$NESDAY ,NIY #a4.> ,AS ,I HAVE BE51 Y\ TELL ME1 ?REE DAYS )\T WRIT+1 ,I \T BE ORGANIZ$ FROM M9E6 ,Y\ WILL TELL ME1 ?AT EX]TIONS >E NECESS>Y3 ,I AM WE>Y ( !M6 ,! FACE ( ?+S1 PUBLIC & PRIVATE1 VEXES ME4 ,! 0PEACE0 & CLEM5CY :I* SEEM$ TO BE DAWN+ A FEW DAYS AGO1 DISAPPE> AGA94 0,I AM FALL510 AS ,MILTON SAID1 0ON EVIL DAYS20 = ,I REALLY BELIEVE ?AT ,EUROPE WILL BE 9 A /ATE ( CONVULSION1 DUR+ HALF A C5TURY AT LEA/4 ,LIFE IS BUT A LABOR ( PATI5CE3 IT IS ALWAYS ROLL+ A GREAT /ONE UP A HILL2 =1 BE=E A P]SON CAN F9D A RE/+-PLACE1 IMAG9+ IT IS LODG$1 D[N IT COMES AGA91 & ALL ! WORK IS TO BE DONE OV] ANEW6 ,%\LD ,I ATTEMPT TO WRITE ANY MORE1 ,I C\LD NOT *ANGE ! /RA94 ,MY HEAD A*ES1 & MY HE>T IS HEAVY4 ,! WORLD APPE>S AN 0UNWE$$ G>D510 :]E 0?+S RANK & VILE0 FL\RI% BE/4 ,IF Y\ DO NOT RETURN SOON--OR1 :I* IS NO SU* MIE6 & ------1 & ------1 NAY1 ALL ! WORLD1 MAY KN[ IT = AUE6--,YET ,I WI% TO AVOID ------'S CO>SE JOKES4 ,CONSID]+ ! C>E & ANXIETY A WOMAN MU/ HAVE AB\T A *ILD BE=E IT COMES 9TO ! WORLD1 IT SEEMS TO ME1 BY A NATURAL RIY TO CONT9UE OR PRODUCE LIFE6--,>E !SE ! PRIVILEGES ( REASON8 ,AMONG ! FEA!R$ RACE1 :IL/ ! H5 KEEPS ! Y\NG W>M1 H] MATE /AYS BY TO *E] H]2 BUT IT IS SUFFICI5T = MAN TO CONDESC5D TO GET A *ILD1 9 ORD] TO CLAIM IT4--,A MAN IS A TYRANT6 ,Y\ MAY N[ TELL ME1 ?AT1 IF IT W]E NOT = ME1 Y\ W\LD BE LAU<+ AWAY ) SOME HONE/ FELL[S 9 ,L--N4 ,! CASUAL EX]CISE ( SOCIAL SYMPA?Y W\LD NOT BE SUFFICI5T = ME--,I %\LD NOT ?9K SU* AN HE>TLESS LIFE WOR? PRES]V+4--,IT IS NECESS>Y TO BE 9 GOOD-HUMOR ) Y\1 TO BE PLEAS$ ) ! WORLD4 ,?URSDAY ,MORN+4 ,I WAS V]Y L[-SPIRIT$ LA/ NIREL ) Y\R *E]FUL TEMP]1 :I* MAKES ABS5CE EASY TO Y\4--,&1 :Y %\LD ,I M9CE ! ! MATT]8 ,I WAS (F5D$ AT Y\R NOT EV5 M5TION+ IT4--,I DO NOT WANT TO BE LOV$ LIKE A GODDESS2 BUT ,I WI% TO BE NECESS>Y TO Y\4 ,GOD BLESS Y\.<#b#g-,A.>6 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #aa ,MONDAY ,NIT BE /ILL1 BY SAY+ ?AT Y\ =GAVE ME4 ,) EYES OV]FL[+ ) TE>S1 & 9 ! HUMBLE/ ATTITUDE1 ,I 9TREAT Y\4--,DO NOT TURN FROM ME1 = 9DE$ ,I LOVE Y\ FONDLY1 & HAVE BE5 V]Y WRET*$1 S9CE ! NILY TO SLEEP8 ,I AM READY TO ASK AS MANY QUE/IONS AS ,VOLTAIRE'S ,MAN ( ,=TY ,CR[NS4 ,AH6 DO NOT CONT9UE TO BE ANGRY ) ME6 ,Y\ P]CEIVE ?AT ,I AM ALREADY SMIL+ ?R\< MY TE>S--,Y\ HAVE LIT1 & MY FROZ5 SPIRITS >E MELT+ 9TO PLAYFULNESS4 ,WRITE ! MOM5T Y\ RECEIVE ?IS4 ,I %ALL C\NT ! M9UTES4 ,BUT DROP NOT AN ANGRY WORD--,I CANNOT N[ BE> IT4 ,YET1 IF Y\ ?9K ,I DES]VE A SCOLD+ 7IT DOES NOT ADMIT ( A QUE/ION1 ,I GRANT71 WAIT TILL Y\ COME BACK--& !N1 IF Y\ >E ANGRY ONE DAY1 ,I %ALL BE SURE ( SEE+ Y\ ! NEXT4 ------ DID NOT WRITE TO Y\1 ,I SUPPOSE1 BECAUSE HE TALK$ ( GO+ TO ,H----4 ,HE>+ ?AT ,I WAS ILL1 HE CALL$ V]Y K9DLY ON ME1 NOT DREAM+ ?AT IT WAS SOME WORDS ?AT HE 9CAUTI\SLY LET FALL1 :I* R5D]$ ME SO4 ,GOD BLESS Y\1 MY LOVE2 DO NOT %UT Y\R HE>T AGA9/ A RETURN ( T5D]NESS2 &1 AS ,I N[ 9 FANCY CL+ TO Y\1 BE MORE ?AN EV] MY SUPPORT4--,FEEL BUT AS AFFECTIONATE :5 Y\ READ ?IS LETT]1 AS ,I DID WRIT+ IT1 & Y\ WILL MAKE HAPPY1 Y\R O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ab ,W$NESDAY ,MORN+4 ,I WILL NEV]1 IF ,I AM NOT 5TIRELY CUR$ ( QU>REL+1 BEG9 TO 5C\RAGE 0QUICK-COM+ FANCIES10 :5 WE >E SEP>AT$4 ,YE/]DAY1 MY LOVE1 ,I C\LD NOT OP5 Y\R LETT] = SOME TIME2 &1 ?\< IT WAS NOT HALF AS SEV]E AS ,I M]IT$1 IT ?REW ME 9TO SU* A FIT ( TREMBL+1 AS S]I\SLY AL>M$ ME4 ,I DID NOT1 AS Y\ MAY SUPPOSE1 C>E = A LITTLE PA9 ON MY [N ACC\NT2 BUT ALL ! FE>S :I* ,I HAVE HAD = A FEW DAYS PA/1 RETURN$ ) FRE% =CE4 ,?IS MORN+ ,I AM BETT]2 WILL Y\ NOT BE GLAD TO HE> IT8 ,Y\ P]CEIVE ?AT SORR[ HAS ALMO/ MADE A *ILD ( ME1 & ?AT ,I WANT TO BE SOO!D TO PEACE4 ,ONE ?+ Y\ MI/AKE 9 MY *>ACT]1 & IMAG9E ?AT TO BE COLDNESS :I* IS JU/ ! CONTR>Y4 ,=1 :5 ,I AM HURT BY ! P]SON MO/ DE> TO ME1 ,I MU/ LET \T A :OLE TORR5T ( EMOTIONS1 9 :I* T5D]NESS W\LD BE UPP]MO/1 OR /IFLE !M ALTOGE!R2 & IT APPE>S TO ME ALMO/ A DUTY TO /IFLE !M1 :5 ,I IMAG9E ?AT ,I AM TREAT$ ) COLDNESS4 ,I AM AFRAID ?AT ,I HAVE VEX$ Y\1 MY [N ----4 ,I KN[ ! QUICKNESS ( Y\R FEEL+S--& LET ME1 9 ! S9C]ITY ( MY HE>T1 ASSURE Y\1 !RE IS NO?+ ,I W\LD NOT SUFF] TO MAKE Y\ HAPPY4 ,MY [N HAPP9ESS :OLLY DEP5DS ON Y\--&1 KN[+ Y\1 :5 MY REASON IS NOT CL\D$1 ,I LOOK =W>D TO A RATIONAL PROSPECT ( AS MU* FELICITY AS ! E>? AF=DS--) A LITTLE DA% ( RAPTURE 9TO ! B>GA91 IF Y\ WILL LOOK AT ME1 :5 WE MEET AGA91 AS Y\ HAVE SOMETIMES GREET$1 Y\R HUMBL$1 YET MO/ AFFECTIONATE "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ac ,?URSDAY ,NIT SMOTE H] TO ?9K ?AT Y\ W]E /ILL TO RECEIVE ANO!R COLD ONE4--,BURN IT ALSO1 MY ----2 YET DO NOT =GET ?AT EV5 ?OSE LETT]S W]E FULL ( LOVE2 & ,I %ALL EV] RECOLLECT1 ?AT Y\ DID NOT WAIT TO BE MOLLIFI$ BY MY P5IT5CE1 BE=E Y\ TOOK ME AGA9 TO Y\R HE>T4 ,I HAVE BE5 UNWELL1 & W\LD NOT1 N[ ,I AM RECOV]+1 TAKE A J\RNEY1 BECAUSE ,I HAVE BE5 S]I\SLY AL>M$ & ANGRY ) MYSELF1 DREAD+ CONT9UALLY ! FATAL CONSEQU5CE ( MY FOLLY4--,BUT1 %\LD Y\ ?9K IT RIE ( MYSELF1 AS ,I HAVE DONE S9CE Y\ RE/OR$ MY PEACE ( M9D4 ,! GIRL IS COME TO W>M MY B$--SO ,I WILL T5D]LY SAY1 GOOD NIELESS ( EV]Y ?+4 ,I WILL N[ SALLY =? 7Y\ WILL GO ) ME 9 MY HE>T7 & TRY :E!R ?IS F9E BRAC+ AIR WILL NOT GIVE ! VIGOR TO ! POOR BABE1 IT HAD1 BE=E ,I SO 9CONSID]ATELY GAVE WAY TO ! GRIEF ?AT D]ANG$ MY B[ELS1 & GAVE A TURN TO MY :OLE SY/EM4 ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ad ,SATURDAY ,MORN+4 ,! TWO OR ?REE LETT]S1 :I* ,I HAVE WRITT5 TO Y\ LATELY1 MY LOVE1 WILL S]VE AS AN ANSW] TO Y\R EXPLANATORY ONE4 ,I CANNOT BUT RESPECT Y\R MOTIVES & CONDUCT4 ,I ALWAYS RESPECT$ !M2 & WAS ONLY HURT1 BY :AT SEEM$ TO ME A WANT ( CONFID5CE1 & CONSEQU5TLY AFFECTION4--,I ?\DON--& ,I WILL BE C>EFUL NOT TO TORM5T Y\ ) MY QU]UL\S HUMORS1 AT LEA/1 TILL ,I SEE Y\ AGA94 ,ACT AS CIRCUM/ANCES DIRECT1 & ,I WILL NOT 9QUIRE :5 !Y WILL P]MIT Y\ TO RETURN1 CONV9C$ ?AT Y\ WILL HA/5 TO Y\R "9 "9 "9 "91 :5 Y\ HAVE ATTA9$ 7OR LO/ SIT ON ?IS R\ND NUMB]4 ,I AM GO+ TO D9E ) ,MRS4 ----4 ,I HAVE NOT BE5 TO VISIT H] S9CE ! FIR/ DAY %E CAME TO ,P>IS4 ,I WI% 9DE$ TO BE \T 9 ! AIR AS MU* AS ,I CAN2 = ! EX]CISE ,I HAVE TAK5 !SE TWO OR ?REE DAYS PA/1 HAS BE5 ( SU* S]VICE TO ME1 ?AT ,I HOPE %ORTLY TO TELL Y\1 ?AT ,I AM QUITE WELL4 ,I HAVE SC>CELY SLEPT BE=E LA/ NI+ FROM ME1 AFT] HAV+ TALK$ ( ILLNESS & APPREH5SIONS4 ,I CANNOT BOA/ ( BE+ QUITE RECOV]$1 YET ,I AM 7,I MU/ USE MY ,YORK%IRE PHRASE2 =1 :5 MY HE>T IS W>M1 POP COME ! EXPRESSIONS ( *ILDHOOD 9TO MY HEAD7 SO LIT1 ,I ASSURE Y\2 = ,I AM URG$ ON1 NOT ONLY BY AN 5LIV5$ AFFECTION = Y\1 BUT BY A NEW-BORN T5D]NESS ?AT PLAYS *E]LY R\ND MY DILAT+ HE>T4 ,I WAS !RE=E1 9 DEFIANCE ( COLD & DIRT1 \T 9 ! AIR ! GREAT] P>T ( YE/]DAY2 &1 IF ,I GET OV] ?IS EV5+ )\T A RETURN ( ! FEV] ?AT HAS TORM5T$ ME1 ,I %ALL TALK NO MORE ( ILLNESS4 ,I HAVE PROMIS$ ! LITTLE CREATURE1 ?AT ITS MO!R1 :O \DON ME2 &1 S9CE ,I C\LD NOT HUG EI!R IT OR Y\ TO MY BREA/1 ,I HAVE TO MY HE>T4--,I AM AFRAID TO READ OV] ?IS PRATTLE--BUT IT IS ONLY = Y\R EYE4 ,I HAVE BE5 S]I\SLY VEX$1 TO F9D ?AT1 :IL/ Y\ W]E H>RASS$ BY IMP$IM5TS 9 Y\R UND]TAK+S1 ,I WAS GIV+ Y\ ADDITIONAL UNEAS9ESS4--,IF Y\ CAN MAKE ANY ( Y\R PLANS ANSW]--IT IS WELL1 ,I DO NOT ?9K A LITTLE MONEY 9CONV5I5T2 BUT1 %\LD !Y FAIL1 WE WILL /RUGGLE *E]FULLY TOGE!R--DRAWN CLOS] BY ! P9*+ BLA/S ( POV]TY4 ,ADIEU1 MY LOVE6 ,WRITE (T5 TO Y\R POOR GIRL1 & WRITE LONG LETT]S2 = ,I NOT ONLY LIKE !M = BE+ LONG]1 BUT BECAUSE MORE HE>T /EALS 9TO !M2 & ,I AM HAPPY TO CAT* Y\R HE>T :5EV] ,I CAN4 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #af ,TUESDAY ,MORN+4 ,I SEIZE ?IS OPPORTUNITY TO 9=M Y\1 ?AT ,I AM TO SET \T ON ,?URSDAY ) ,MR4 ------1 & HOPE TO TELL Y\ SOON 7ON Y\R LIPS7 H[ GLAD ,I %ALL BE TO SEE Y\4 ,I HAVE JU/ GOT MY PASSPORT1 SO ,I DO NOT =ESEE ANY IMP$IM5T TO MY REA*+ ,H----1 TO BID Y\ GOOD-NITM5T--:]E ,I AM TO MEET Y\ & LOVE1 9 SPITE ( C>E1 TO SMILE ME TO SLEEP--= ,I HAVE NOT CAUT$4 ,Y\ HAVE1 BY Y\R T5D]NESS & WOR?1 TWI/$ Y\RSELF MORE >TFULLY R\ND MY HE>T1 ?AN ,I SUPPOS$ POSSIBLE4--,LET ME 9DULGE ! ?\ASITE-PLANT1 ,I AM WILL+ TO RECEIVE ! PRO(S ( AFFECTION1 ?AT EV]Y PULSE REPLIES TO1 :5 ,I ?9K ( BE+ ONCE MORE 9 ! SAME H\SE ) Y\4--,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ag ,W$NESDAY ,MORN+4 ,I ONLY S5D ?IS AS AN AVANT-C\REUR1 )\T JACK-BOOTS1 TO TELL Y\1 ?AT ,I AM AGA9 ON ! W+1 & HOPE TO BE ) Y\ A FEW H\RS AFT] Y\ RECEIVE IT4 ,I %ALL F9D Y\ WELL1 & COMPOS$1 ,I AM SURE2 OR1 MORE PROP]LY SPEAK+1 *E]FUL4--,:AT IS ! REASON ?AT MY SPIRITS >E NOT AS MANAGEABLE AS Y\RS8 ,YET1 N[ ,I ?9K ( IT1 ,I WILL NOT ALL[ ?AT Y\R TEMP] IS EV51 ?\< ,I HAVE PROMIS$ MYSELF1 9 ORD] TO OBTA9 MY [N =GIV5ESS1 ?AT ,I WILL NOT RUFFLE IT = A LONG1 LONG TIME--,I AM AFRAID TO SAY NEV]4 ,F>EWELL = A MOM5T6--,DO NOT =GET ?AT ,I AM DRIV+ T[>DS Y\ 9 P]SON6 ,MY M9D1 UNFETT]$1 HAS FL[N TO Y\ LONG S9CE1 OR RA!R HAS NEV] LEFT Y\4 ,I AM WELL1 & HAVE NO APPREH5SION ?AT ,I %ALL F9D ! J\RNEY TOO FATIGU+1 :5 ,I FOLL[ ! LEAD ( MY HE>T4--,) MY FACE TURN$ TO ,H-- MY SPIRITS WILL NOT S9K--& MY M9D HAS ALWAYS HI!RTO 5ABL$ MY BODY TO DO :ATEV] ,I WI%$4 ,Y\RS AFFECTIONATELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ah ,H--1 ,?URSDAY ,MORN+1 ,M>* #a#b4 ,WE >E SU* CREATURES ( HABIT1 MY LOVE1 ?AT1 ?\< ,I CANNOT SAY ,I WAS SORRY1 *ILDI%LY SO1 = Y\R GO+1 :5 ,I KNEW ?AT Y\ W]E TO /AY SU* A %ORT TIME1 & ,I HAD A PLAN ( EMPLOYM5T2 YET ,I C\LD NOT SLEEP4--,I TURN$ TO Y\R SIDE ( ! B$1 & TRI$ TO MAKE ! MO/ ( ! COM=T ( ! PILL[1 :I* Y\ US$ TO TELL ME ,I WAS *URLI% AB\T2 BUT ALL W\LD NOT DO4--,I TOOK NEV]!LESS MY WALK BE=E BREAKFA/1 ?\< ! WEA!R WAS NOT V]Y 9VIT+--& H]E ,I AM1 WI%+ Y\ A F9] DAY1 & SEE+ Y\ PEEP OV] MY %\LD]1 AS ,I WRITE1 ) ONE ( Y\R K9DE/ LOOKS--:5 Y\R EYES GLI/51 & A SUFFUSION CREEPS OV] Y\R RELAX+ FEATURES4 ,BUT ,I DO NOT MEAN TO DALLY ) Y\ ?IS MORN+--,SO ,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,TAKE C>E ( Y\RSELF--& SOMETIMES FOLD TO Y\R HE>T Y\R AFFECTIONATE "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ai ,D,O NOT CALL ME /UPID1 = LEAV+ ON ! TABLE ! LITTLE BIT ( PAP] ,I WAS TO 5CLOSE4--,?IS COMES ( BE+ 9 LOVE AT ! FAG-5D ( A LETT] ( BUS9ESS4--,Y\ KN[1 Y\ SAY1 !Y WILL NOT *IME TOGE!R4--,I HAD GOT Y\ BY ! FIRE-SIDE1 ) ! GIGOT SMOK+ ON ! BO>D1 TO L>D Y\R POOR B>E RIBS--& BEHOLD1 ,I CLOS$ MY LETT] )\T TAK+ ! PAP] UP1 ?AT WAS DIRECTLY UND] MY EYES6--,:AT HAD ,I GOT 9 !M TO R5D] ME SO BL9D8--,I GIVE Y\ LEAVE TO ANSW] ! QUE/ION1 IF Y\ WILL NOT SCOLD2 = ,I AM ,Y\RS MO/ AFFECTIONATELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #b ,SUNDAY1 ,AUGU/ #a#g4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,I HAVE PROMIS$ ------ TO GO ) HIM TO HIS C\NTRY-H\SE1 :]E HE IS N[ P]MITT$ TO D9E--,I1 & ! LITTLE D>L+1 TO BE SURE.<#d#g-,A.>--:OM ,I CANNOT HELP KISS+ ) MORE FONDNESS1 S9CE Y\ LEFT US4 ,I ?9K ,I %ALL 5JOY ! F9E PROSPECT1 & ?AT IT WILL RA!R 5LIV51 ?AN SATIATE MY IMAG9ATION4 ,I HAVE CALL$ ON ,MRS4 ------4 ,%E HAS ! MANN]S ( A G5TLEWOMAN1 ) A DA% ( ! EASY ,FR5* COQUETRY1 :I* R5D]S H] PIQUANTE4--,BUT ,MONSIEUR H] HUSB&1 :OM NATURE NEV] DREAM$ ( CA/+ 9 EI!R ! MOLD ( A G5TLEMAN OR LOV]1 MAKES BUT AN AUKW>D FIGURE 9 ! =EGR\ND ( ! PICTURE4 ,! ,H----S >E V]Y UGLY1 )\T D\BT--& ! H\SE SMELT ( COMM]CE FROM TOP TO TOE--SO ?AT HIS ABORTIVE ATTEMPT TO DISPLAY TA/E1 ONLY PROV$ IT TO BE ONE ( ! ?+S NOT TO BE B\1 TO A FAT-BOTTOM$ ,CUPID 7SAV+ Y\R PRES5CE71 :O WAS KICK+ HIS HEELS 9 ! AIR4--,AH6 KICK ON1 ?\E1 5ABLES US TO CAT* A HA/Y DRAFT ( ! RUNN+ /REAM ( DELIE-HEAD$ MONEY-GETT]S ALONE4--,PEACE TO !M6 ?\< NONE ( ! SOCIAL SPRITES 7& !RE >E NOT A FEW ( DIFF]5T DESCRIPTIONS1 :O SPORT AB\T ! V>I\S 9LETS TO MY HE>T7 GAVE ME A TWIT* TO RE/RA9 MY P54 ,I HAVE BE5 WRIT+ ON1 EXPECT+ POOR ------ TO COME2 =1 :5 ,I BEGAN1 ,I M]ELY ?\CELY WOR? HAV+1 EV5 ) A GIGOT EV]Y DAY1 & A PUDD+ ADD$ !REUNTO1 ,I WILL ALL[ Y\ TO CULTIVATE MY JUDGM5T1 IF Y\ WILL P]MIT ME TO KEEP ALIVE ! S5TIM5TS 9 Y\R HE>T1 :I* MAY BE T]M$ ROMANTIC1 BECAUSE1 ! (FSPR+ ( ! S5SES & ! IMAG9ATION1 !Y RESEMBLE ! MO!R MORE ?AN ! FA!R.<#e-,A.>1 :5 !Y PRODUCE ! SUFFUSION ,I ADMIRE4--,9 SPITE ( ICY AGE1 ,I HOPE /ILL TO SEE IT1 IF Y\ HAVE NOT DET]M9$ ONLY TO EAT & DR9K1 & BE /UPIDLY USEFUL TO ! /UPID-- ,Y\RS "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ba ,H--1 ,AUGU/ #a#i1 ,TUESDAY4 ,I RECEIV$ BO? Y\R LETT]S TO-DAY--,I HAD RECKON$ ON HE>+ FROM Y\ YE/]DAY1 !RE=E WAS DISAPPO9T$1 ?\< ,I IMPUT$ Y\R SIL5CE TO ! RINE/ DESIRE ,I HAVE %[N TO KEEP MY PLACE1 OR GA9 MORE GR\ND 9 Y\R HE>T1 IS A SURE PRO( H[ NECESS>Y Y\R AFFECTION IS TO MY HAPP9ESS4--,/ILL ,I DO NOT ?9K IT FALSE DELICACY1 OR FOOLI% PRIDE1 TO WI% ?AT Y\R ATT5TION TO MY HAPP9ESS %\LD >ISE AS MU* FROM LOVE1 :I* IS ALWAYS RA!R A SELFI% PASSION1 AS REASON--?AT IS1 ,I WANT Y\ TO PROMOTE MY FELICITY1 BY SEEK+ Y\R [N4--,=1 :ATEV] PLEASURE IT MAY GIVE ME TO DISCOV] Y\R G5]OSITY ( S\L1 ,I W\LD NOT BE DEP5D5T = Y\R AFFECTION ON ! V]Y QUALITY ,I MO/ ADMIRE4 ,NO2 !RE >E QUALITIES 9 Y\R HE>T1 :I* DEM& MY AFFECTION2 BUT1 UNLESS ! ATTA*M5T APPE>S TO ME CLE>LY MUTUAL1 ,I %ALL LABOR ONLY TO E/EEM Y\R *>ACT]1 9/EAD ( *]I%+ A T5D]NESS = Y\R P]SON4 ,I WRITE 9 A HURRY1 BECAUSE ! LITTLE ONE1 :O HAS BE5 SLEEP+ A LONG TIME1 BEG9S TO CALL = ME4 ,POOR ?+6 :5 ,I AM SAD1 ,I LAM5T ?AT ALL MY AFFECTIONS GR[ ON ME1 TILL !Y BECOME TOO /RONG = MY PEACE1 ?\< !Y ALL AF=D ME SNAT*ES ( EXQUISITE 5JOYM5T--,?IS = \R LITTLE GIRL WAS AT FIR/ V]Y REASONABLE--MORE ! EFFECT ( REASON1 A S5SE ( DUTY1 ?AN FEEL+--N[1 %E HAS GOT 9TO MY HE>T & IMAG9ATION1 & :5 ,I WALK \T )\T H]1 H] LITTLE FIGURE IS EV] DANC+ BE=E ME4 ,Y\ TOO HAVE SOMEH[ CLUNG R\ND MY HE>T--,I F\ND ,I C\LD NOT EAT MY D9N] 9 ! GREAT ROOM--&1 :5 ,I TOOK UP ! L>GE KNIFE TO C>VE = MYSELF1 TE>S RU%$ 9TO MY EYES4--,DO NOT H[EV] SUPPOSE ?AT ,I AM MELAN*OLY--=1 :5 Y\ >E FROM ME1 ,I NOT ONLY WOND] H[ ,I CAN F9D FAULT ) Y\--BUT H[ ,I CAN D\BT Y\R AFFECTION4 ,I WILL NOT MIX ANY COMM5TS ON ! 5CLOS$ 7IT R\S$ MY 9DIGNATION7 ) ! EFFUSION ( T5D]NESS1 ) :I* ,I ASSURE Y\1 ?AT Y\ >E ! FRI5D ( MY BOSOM1 & ! PROP ( MY HE>T4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bb ,H--1 ,AUGU/ #b4 ,I WANT TO KN[ :AT /EPS Y\ HAVE TAK5 RESPECT+ ----4 ,KNAV]Y ALWAYS R\SES MY 9DIGNATION--,I %\LD BE GRATIFI$ TO HE> ?AT ! LAW HAD *A/IS$ ------ SEV]ELY2 BUT ,I DO NOT WI% Y\ TO SEE HIM1 BECAUSE ! BUS9ESS DOES NOT N[ ADMIT ( PEACEFUL DISCUSSION1 & ,I DO NOT EXACTLY KN[ H[ Y\ W\LD EXPRESS Y\R CONTEMPT4 ,PRAY ASK SOME QUE/IONS AB\T ,TALLI5--,I AM /ILL PLEAS$ ) ! DIGNITY ( HIS CONDUCT4--,! O!R DAY1 9 ! CAUSE ( HUMANITY1 HE MADE USE ( A DEGREE ( ADDRESS1 :I* ,I ADMIRE--& MEAN TO PO9T \T TO Y\1 AS ONE ( ! FEW 9/ANCES ( ADDRESS :I* DO CR$IT TO ! ABILITIES ( ! MAN1 )\T TAK+ AWAY FROM ?AT CONFID5CE 9 HIS OP5NESS ( HE>T1 :I* IS ! TRUE BASIS ( BO? PUBLIC & PRIVATE FRI5D%IP4 ,DO NOT SUPPOSE ?AT ,I MEAN TO ALLUDE TO A LITTLE RES]VE ( TEMP] 9 Y\1 ( :I* ,I HAVE SOMETIMES COMPLA9$6 ,Y\ HAVE BE5 US$ TO A CUNN+ WOMAN1 & Y\ ALMO/ LOOK = CUNN+--,NAY1 9 MANAG+ MY HAPP9ESS1 Y\ N[ & !N W\ND$ MY S5SIBILITY1 CONCEAL+ Y\RSELF1 TILL HONE/ SYMPA?Y1 GIV+ Y\ TO ME )\T DISGUISE1 LETS ME LOOK 9TO A HE>T1 :I* MY HALF-BROK5 ONE WI%ES TO CREEP 9TO1 TO BE REVIV$ & *]I%$4----,Y\ HAVE FRANKNESS ( HE>T1 BUT NOT (T5 EXACTLY ?AT OV]FL[+ 7EPAN*EM5T DE COEUR71 :I* BECOM+ ALMO/ *ILDI%1 APPE>S A WEAKNESS ONLY TO ! WEAK4 ,BUT ,I HAVE LEFT POOR ,TALLI54 ,I WANT$ Y\ TO 9QUIRE LIKEWISE :E!R1 AS A MEMB] DECL>$ 9 ! CONV5TION1 ,ROBESPI]RE REALLY MA9TA9$ A NUMB] ( MI/RESSES4--,%\LD IT PROVE SO1 ,I SUSPECT ?AT !Y RA!R FLATT]$ HIS VANITY ?AN HIS S5SES4 ,H]E IS A *ATT+1 DESULTORY EPI/LE6 ,BUT DO NOT SUPPOSE ?AT ,I MEAN TO CLOSE IT )\T M5TION+ ! LITTLE DAMSEL--:O HAS BE5 ALMO/ SPR++ \T ( MY >M--%E C]TA9LY LOOKS V]Y LIKE Y\--BUT ,I DO NOT LOVE H] ! LESS = ?AT1 :E!R ,I AM ANGRY OR PLEAS$ ) Y\4-- ,Y\RS AFFECTIONATELY O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bc ,SEPTEMB] #b#b4.<#e#h-,A.> ,I HAVE JU/ WRITT5 TWO LETT]S1 ?AT >E GO+ BY O!R CONVEYANCES1 & :I* ,I RECKON ON Y\R RECEIV+ LONG BE=E ?IS4 ,I !RE=E M]ELY WRITE1 BECAUSE ,I KN[ ,I %\LD BE DISAPPO9T$ AT SEE+ ANY ONE :O HAD LEFT Y\1 IF Y\ DID NOT S5D A LETT]1 W]E IT EV] SO %ORT1 TO TELL ME :Y Y\ DID NOT WRITE A LONG]--& Y\ WILL WANT TO BE TOLD1 OV] & OV] AGA91 ?AT \R LITTLE ,H]CULES IS QUITE RECOV]$4 ,BESIDES LOOK+ AT ME1 !RE >E ?REE O!R ?+S1 :I* DELILET WAI/COAT1 & HE> L\D MUSIC--YE/]DAY1 AT ! FETE1 %E 5JOY$ ! TWO LATT]2 BUT1 TO HONOR ,J4 ,J4 ,R\SSEAU1 ,I 9T5D TO GIVE H] A SA%1 ! FIR/ %E HAS EV] HAD R\ND H]--& :Y NOT8--= ,I HAVE ALWAYS BE5 HALF 9 LOVE ) HIM4 ,WELL1 ?IS Y\ WILL SAY IS TRIFL+--%ALL ,I TALK AB\T ALUM OR SOAP8 ,!RE IS NO?+ PICTURESQUE 9 Y\R PRES5T PURSUITS2 MY IMAG9ATION !N RA!R *USES TO RAMBLE BACK TO ! B>RI] ) Y\1 OR TO SEE Y\ COM+ TO MEET ME1 & MY BASKET ( GRAPES4--,) :AT PLEASURE DO ,I RECOLLECT Y\R LOOKS & WORDS1 :5 ,I HAVE BE5 SITT+ ON ! W9D[1 REG>D+ ! WAV+ CORN6 ,BELIEVE ME1 SAGE SIR1 Y\ HAVE NOT SUFFICI5T RESPECT = ! IMAG9ATION--,I C\LD PROVE TO Y\ 9 A TRICE ?AT IT IS ! MO!R ( S5TIM5T1 ! GREAT DI/9CTION ( \R NATURE1 ! ONLY PURIFI] ( ! PASSIONS--ANIMALS HAVE A PORTION ( REASON1 & EQUAL1 IF NOT MORE EXQUISITE1 S5SES2 BUT NO TRACE ( IMAG9ATION1 OR H] (FSPR+ TA/E1 APPE>S 9 ANY ( !IR ACTIONS4 ,! IMPULSE ( ! S5SES1 PASSIONS1 IF Y\ WILL1 & ! CONCLUSIONS ( REASON1 DRAW M5 TOGE!R2 BUT ! IMAG9ATION IS ! TRUE FIRE1 /OL5 FROM HEAV51 TO ANIMATE ?IS COLD CREATURE ( CLAY1 PRODUC+ ALL ?OSE F9E SYMPA?IES ?AT LEAD TO RAPTURE1 R5D]+ M5 SOCIAL BY EXP&+ !IR HE>TS1 9/EAD ( LEAV+ !M LEISURE TO CALCULATE H[ MANY COM=TS SOCIETY AF=DS4 ,IF Y\ CALL !SE OBS]VATIONS ROMANTIC1 A PHRASE 9 ?IS PLACE :I* W\LD BE TANTAM\NT TO NONS5SICAL1 ,I %ALL BE APT TO RETORT1 ?AT Y\ >E EMBRUT$ BY TRADE1 & ! VULG> 5JOYM5TS ( LIFE--,BR+ ME !N BACK Y\R B>RI]-FACE1 OR Y\ %ALL HAVE NO?+ TO SAY TO MY B>RI]-GIRL2 & ,I %ALL FLY FROM Y\1 TO *]I% ! REMEMBRANCES ?AT WILL EV] BE DE> TO ME2 = ,I AM Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bd ,EV5+1 ,SEPT4 #b#c4 ,I HAVE BE5 PLAY+ & LAU<+ ) ! LITTLE GIRL SO LONG1 ?AT ,I CANNOT TAKE UP MY P5 TO ADDRESS Y\ )\T EMOTION4 ,PRESS+ H] TO MY BOSOM1 %E LOOK$ SO LIKE Y\ 75TRE N\S1 Y\R BE/ LOOKS1 = ,I DO NOT ADMIRE Y\R COMM]CIAL FACE7 EV]Y N]VE SEEM$ TO VIBRATE TO ! T\*1 & ,I BEGAN TO ?9K ?AT !RE WAS SOME?+ 9 ! ASS]TION ( MAN & WIFE BE+ ONE--= Y\ SEEM$ TO P]VADE MY :OLE FRAME1 QUICK5+ ! BEAT ( MY HE>T1 & L5D+ ME ! SYMPA!TIC TE>S Y\ EXCIT$4 ,HAVE ,I ANY ?+ MORE TO SAY TO Y\8 ,NO2 NOT = ! PRES5T--! RE/ IS ALL FL[N AWAY2 &1 9DULG+ T5D]NESS = Y\1 ,I CANNOT N[ COMPLA9 ( SOME PEOPLE H]E1 :O HAVE RUFFL$ MY TEMP] = TWO OR ?REE DAYS PA/4 ,MORN+4 ,YE/]DAY ,B---- S5T TO ME = MY PACKET ( LETT]S4 ,HE CALL$ ON ME BE=E2 & ,I LIKE HIM BETT] ?AN ,I DID--?AT IS1 ,I HAVE ! SAME OP9ION ( HIS UND]/&+1 BUT ,I ?9K ) Y\1 HE HAS MORE T5D]NESS & REAL DELICACY ( FEEL+ ) RESPECT TO WOM51 ?AN >E COMMONLY TO BE MET )4 ,HIS MANN] TOO ( SPEAK+ ( HIS LITTLE GIRL1 AB\T ! AGE ( M9E1 9T]E/$ ME4 ,I GAVE HIM A LETT] = MY SI/]1 & REQUE/$ HIM TO SEE H]4 ,I HAVE BE5 9T]RUPT$4 ,MR4 ---- ,I SUPPOSE WILL WRITE AB\T BUS9ESS4 ,PUBLIC AFFAIRS ,I DO NOT DESCANT ON1 EXCEPT TO TELL Y\ ?AT !Y WRITE N[ ) GREAT FRE$OM & TRU?1 & ?IS LIB]TY ( ! PRESS WILL OV]?R[ ! ,JACOB9S1 ,I PLA9LY P]CEIVE4 ,I HOPE Y\ TAKE C>E ( Y\R HEAL?4 ,I HAVE GOT A HABIT ( RE/LESSNESS AT NIISES1 ,I BELIEVE1 FROM ACTIVITY ( M9D2 =1 :5 ,I AM ALONE1 ?AT IS1 NOT NE> ONE TO :OM ,I CAN OP5 MY HE>T1 ,I S9K 9TO REV]IES & TRA9S ( ?9K+1 :I* AGITATE & FATIGUE ME4 ,?IS IS MY ?IRD LETT]2 :5 AM ,I TO HE> FROM Y\8 ,I NE$ NOT TELL Y\1 ,I SUPPOSE1 ?AT ,I AM N[ WRIT+ ) SOMEBODY 9 ! ROOM ) ME1 & ---- IS WAIT+ TO C>RY ?IS TO ,MR4 ----'S4 ,I WILL !N KISS ! GIRL = Y\1 & BID Y\ ADIEU4 ,I DESIR$ Y\1 9 ONE ( MY O!R LETT]S1 TO BR+ BACK TO ME Y\R B>RI]-FACE--OR ?AT Y\ %\LD NOT BE LOV$ BY MY B>RI]-GIRL4 ,I KN[ ?AT Y\ WILL LOVE H] MORE & MORE1 = %E IS A LITTLE AFFECTIONATE1 9TELLIG5T CREATURE1 ) AS MU* VIVACITY1 ,I %\LD ?9K1 AS Y\ C\LD WI% =4 ,I WAS GO+ TO TELL Y\ ( TWO OR ?REE ?+S :I* DISPLEASE ME H]E2 BUT !Y >E NOT ( SUFFICI5T CONSEQU5CE TO 9T]RUPT PLEAS+ S5SATIONS4 ,I HAVE RECEIV$ A LETT] FROM ,MR4 ----4 ,I WANT Y\ TO BR+ ---- ) Y\4 ,MADAME ,S---- IS BY ME1 READ+ A ,G]MAN TRANSLATION ( Y\R LETT]S--%E DESIRES ME TO GIVE H] LOVE TO Y\1 ON ACC\NT ( :AT Y\ SAY ( ! NEGROES4 ,Y\RS MO/ AFFECTIONATELY1 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #be ,P>IS1 ,SEPT4 #b#h4 ,I HAVE WRITT5 TO Y\ ?REE OR F\R LETT]S2 BUT DIFF]5T CAUSES HAVE PREV5T$ MY S5D+ !M BY ! P]SONS :O PROMIS$ TO TAKE OR =W>D !M4 ,! 5CLOS$ IS ONE ,I WROTE TO GO BY ,B----2 YET1 F9D+ ?AT HE WILL NOT >RIVE1 BE=E ,I HOPE1 & BELIEVE1 Y\ WILL HAVE SET \T ON Y\R RETURN1 ,I 5CLOSE IT TO Y\1 & %ALL GIVE IT 9 *>GE TO ----1 AS ,MR4 ---- IS DETA9$1 TO :OM ,I ALSO GAVE A LETT]4 ,I CANNOT HELP BE+ ANXI\S TO HE> FROM Y\2 BUT ,I %ALL NOT H>RASS Y\ ) ACC\NTS ( 9QUIETUDES1 OR ( C>ES ?AT >ISE FROM PECULI> CIRCUM/ANCES4--,I HAVE HAD SO MANY LITTLE PLAGUES H]E1 ?AT ,I HAVE ALMO/ LAM5T$ ?AT ,I LEFT ,H----4 ----1 :O IS AT BE/ A MO/ HELPLESS CREATURE1 IS N[1 ON ACC\NT ( H] PREGNANCY1 MORE TR\BLE ?AN USE TO ME1 SO ?AT ,I /ILL CONT9UE TO BE ALMO/ A SLAVE TO ! *ILD4--,%E 9DE$ REW>DS ME1 = %E IS A SWEET LITTLE CREATURE2 =1 SETT+ ASIDE A MO!R'S FONDNESS 7:I*1 BY ! BYE1 IS GR[+ ON ME1 H] LITTLE 9TELLIG5T SMILES S9K+ 9TO MY HE>T71 %E HAS AN A/ONI%+ DEGREE ( S5SIBILITY & OBS]VATION4 ,! O!R DAY BY ,B----'S *ILD1 A F9E ONE1 %E LOOK$ LIKE A LITTLE SPRITE4--,%E IS ALL LIFE & MOTION1 & H] EYES >E NOT ! EYES ( A FOOL--,I WILL SWE>4 ,I SLEPT AT ,/4 ,G]MA9'S1 9 ! V]Y ROOM 7IF Y\ HAVE NOT =GOT7 9 :I* Y\ PRESS$ ME V]Y T5D]LY TO Y\R HE>T4--,I DID NOT =GET TO FOLD MY D>L+ TO M9E1 ) S5SATIONS ?AT >E ALMO/ TOO SACR$ TO BE ALLUD$ TO4 ,ADIEU1 MY LOVE6 ,TAKE C>E ( Y\RSELF1 IF Y\ WI% TO BE ! PROTECTOR ( Y\R *ILD1 & ! COM=T ( H] MO!R4 ,I HAVE RECEIV$1 = Y\1 LETT]S FROM --------4 ,I WANT TO HE> H[ ?AT AFFAIR F9I%ES1 ?\< ,I DO NOT KN[ :E!R ,I HAVE MO/ CONTEMPT = HIS FOLLY OR KNAV]Y4 ,Y\R [N "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bf ,OCTOB] #a4 ,IT IS A HE>TLESS TASK TO WRITE LETT]S1 )\T KN[+ :E!R !Y WILL EV] REA* Y\4--,I HAVE GIV5 TWO TO ----1 :O HAS BE5 A-GO+1 A-GO+1 EV]Y DAY1 = A WEEK PA/2 & ?REE O!RS1 :I* W]E WRITT5 9 A L[-SPIRIT$ /RA91 A LITTLE QU]UL\S OR SO1 ,I HAVE NOT BE5 ABLE TO =W>D BY ! OPPORTUNITIES ?AT W]E M5TION$ TO ME4 ,TANT MIEUX6 Y\ WILL SAY1 & ,I WILL NOT SAY NAY2 = ,I %\LD BE SORRY ?AT ! CONT5TS ( A LETT]1 :5 Y\ >E SO F> AWAY1 %\LD DAMP ! PLEASURE ?AT ! SIE !N A DE> AFFECTIONATE CREATURE1 & ,I WILL NOT PLAGUE Y\4 ,! LETT] :I* Y\ *ANCE TO RECEIVE1 :5 ! ABS5CE IS SO LONG1 \S ( T5D]NESS1 )\T ANY BITT] ALLOY1 9TO Y\R EYES4 ,AFT] Y\R RETURN ,I HOPE 9DE$1 ?AT Y\ WILL NOT BE SO IMM]S$ 9 BUS9ESS1 AS DUR+ ! LA/ ?REE OR F\R MON?S PA/--= EV5 MONEY1 TAK+ 9TO ! ACC\NT ALL ! FUTURE COM=TS IT IS TO PROCURE1 MAY BE GA9$ AT TOO DE> A RATE1 IF PA9FUL IMPRESSIONS >E LEFT ON ! M9D4--,!SE IMPRESSIONS W]E MU* MORE LIVELY1 SOON AFT] Y\ W5T AWAY1 ?AN AT PRES5T--= A ?\S& T5D] RECOLLECTIONS EFFACE ! MELAN*OLY TRACES !Y LEFT ON MY M9D--& EV]Y EMOTION IS ON ! SAME SIDE AS MY REASON1 :I* ALWAYS WAS ON Y\RS4--,SEP>AT$1 IT W\LD BE ALMO/ IMPI\S TO DWELL ON REAL OR IMAG9>Y IMP]FECTIONS ( *>ACT]4--,I FEEL ?AT ,I LOVE Y\2 &1 IF ,I CANNOT BE HAPPY ) Y\1 ,I WILL SEEK IT NO :]E ELSE4 ,MY LITTLE D>L+ GR[S EV]Y DAY MORE DE> TO ME--& %E (T5 HAS A KISS1 :5 WE >E ALONE TOGE!R1 :I* ,I GIVE H] = Y\1 ) ALL MY HE>T4 ,I HAVE BE5 9T]RUPT$--& MU/ S5D (F MY LETT]4 ,! LIB]TY ( ! PRESS WILL PRODUCE A GREAT EFFECT H]E--! CRY ( BLOOD WILL NOT BE VA96--,SOME MORE MON/]S WILL P]I%--& ! ,JACOB9S >E CONQU]$4--,YET ,I ALMO/ FE> ! LA/ SLAP ( ! TAIL ( ! BEA/4 ,I HAVE HAD SEV]AL TRIFL+ TEAZ+ 9CONV5I5CIES H]E1 :I* ,I %ALL NOT N[ TR\BLE Y\ ) A DETAIL (4--,I AM S5D+ ---- BACK2 H] PREGNANCY R5D]$ H] USELESS4 ,! GIRL ,I HAVE GOT HAS MORE VIVACITY1 :I* IS BETT] = ! *ILD4 ,I LONG TO HE> FROM Y\4--,BR+ A COPY ( ---- & ---- ) Y\4 ---- IS /ILL H]E3 HE IS A LO/ MAN4--,HE REALLY LOVES HIS WIFE1 & IS ANXI\S AB\T HIS *ILDR52 BUT HIS 9DISCRIM9ATE HOSPITALITY & SOCIAL FEEL+S HAVE GIV5 HIM AN 9VET]ATE HABIT ( DR9K+1 ?AT DE/ROYS HIS HEAL?1 AS WELL AS R5D]S HIS P]SON DISGU/+4--,IF HIS WIFE HAD MORE S5SE1 OR DELICACY1 %E MI LOVE1 ,I BEGAN TO WI% SO E>NE/LY TO HE> FROM Y\1 ?AT ! SIL+1 IS BECOME A MO/ 9TELLIG5T LITTLE CREATURE1 & AS GAY AS A L>K1 & ?AT 9 ! MORN+ TOO1 :I* ,I DO NOT F9D QUITE SO CONV5I5T4 ,I ONCE TOLD Y\1 ?AT ! S5SATIONS BE=E %E WAS BORN1 & :5 %E IS SUCK+1 W]E PLEASANT2 BUT !Y DO NOT DES]VE TO BE COMP>$ TO ! EMOTIONS ,I FEEL1 :5 %E /OPS TO SMILE UPON ME1 OR LAUGE MY DUTY TO H]1 )\T BE+ ! SLAVE ( IT4 ,I HAVE !RE=E EMPLOY$ & AMUS$ MYSELF S9CE ,I GOT RID ( ----1 & AM MAK+ A PROGRESS 9 ! LANGUAGE AMONG O!R ?+S4 ,I HAVE ALSO MADE SOME NEW ACQUA9TANCE4 ,I HAVE ALMO/ *>M$ A JUDGE ( ! TRIBUNAL1 ,R----1 :O1 ?\< ,I %\LD NOT HAVE ?\SEILLAISE1 :O IS A H&SOME MAN1 A LITTLE TOO BROAD-FAC$ OR SO1 & PLAYS SWEETLY ON ! VIOL94 ,:AT DO Y\ SAY TO ?IS ?REAT8--:Y1 5TRE N\S1 ,I LIKE TO GIVE WAY TO A SPRIT LONGS = Y\R RETURN1 MY LOVE1 & ONLY LOOKS =1 & SEEKS HAPP9ESS ) Y\2 YET DO NOT IMAG9E ?AT ,I *ILDI%LY WI% Y\ TO COME BACK1 BE=E Y\ HAVE >RANG$ ?+S 9 SU* A MANN]1 ?AT IT WILL NOT BE NECESS>Y = Y\ TO LEAVE US SOON AGA92 OR TO MAKE EX]TIONS :I* 9JURE Y\R CON/ITUTION4 ,Y\RS MO/ TRULY & T5D]LY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,P4,S4 0,Y\ W\LD OBLIGE ME BY DELIV]+ ! 5CLOS$ TO ,MR4 ----1 & PRAY CALL = AN ANSW]4--,IT IS = A P]SON UNCOM=TABLY SITUAT$4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bh ,DEC4 #b#f4 ,I HAVE BE51 MY LOVE1 = SOME DAYS TORM5T$ BY FE>S1 ?AT ,I W\LD NOT ALL[ TO ASSUME A =M--,I HAD BE5 EXPECT+ Y\ DAILY--& ,I HE>D ?AT MANY VESSELS HAD BE5 DRIV5 ON %ORE DUR+ ! LATE GALE4--,WELL1 ,I N[ SEE Y\R LETT]--& F9D ?AT Y\ >E SAFE2 ,I WILL NOT REGRET !N ?AT Y\R EX]TIONS HAVE HI!RTO BE5 SO UNAVAIL+4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,BE ?AT AS IT MAY1 RETURN TO ME :5 Y\ HAVE >RANG$ ! O!R MATT]S1 :I* ---- HAS BE5 CR[D+ ON Y\4 ,I WANT TO BE SURE ?AT Y\ >E SAFE--& NOT SEP>AT$ FROM ME BY A SEA ?AT MU/ BE PASS$4 ,=1 FEEL+ ?AT ,I AM HAPPI] ?AN ,I EV] WAS1 DO Y\ WOND] AT MY SOMETIMES DREAD+ ?AT FATE HAS NOT DONE P]SECUT+ ME8 ,COME TO ME1 MY DE>E/ FRI5D1 HUSB&1 FA!R ( MY *ILD6--,ALL !SE FOND TIES GL[ AT MY HE>T AT ?IS MOM5T1 & DIM MY EYES4--,) Y\ AN 9DEP5D5CE IS DESIRABLE2 & IT IS ALWAYS )9 \R REA*1 IF AFFLU5CE ESCAPES US--)\T Y\ ! WORLD AGA9 APPE>S EMPTY TO ME4 ,BUT ,I AM RECURR+ TO SOME ( ! MELAN*OLY ?\L+ IS 9DE$ A SWEET *ILD2 & ,I AM SORRY ?AT Y\ >E NOT H]E1 TO SEE H] LITTLE M9D UNFOLD ITSELF4 ,Y\ TALK ( 0DALLIANCE20 BUT C]TA9LY NO LOV] WAS EV] MORE ATTA*$ TO HIS MI/RESS1 ?AN %E IS TO ME4 ,H] EYES FOLL[ ME EV]Y :]E1 & BY AFFECTION ,I HAVE ! MO/ DESPOTIC P[] OV] H]4 ,%E IS ALL VIVACITY OR S(TNESS--YES2 ,I LOVE H] MORE ?AN ,I ?\T2 = ,I AM TRULY & AFFECTIONATELY ,Y\RS "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #bi ,DECEMB] #b#h4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,I DO1 MY LOVE1 9DE$ S9C]ELY SYMPA?IZE ) Y\ 9 ALL Y\R DISAPPO9TM5TS4--,YET1 KN[+ ?AT Y\ >E WELL1 & ?9K ( ME ) AFFECTION1 ,I ONLY LAM5T O!R DISAPPO9TM5TS1 BECAUSE ,I AM SORRY ?AT Y\ %\LD ?US EX]T Y\RSELF 9 VA91 & ?AT Y\ >E KEPT FROM ME4 ------1 ,I KN[1 URGES Y\ TO /AY1 & IS CONT9UALLY BRAN*+ \T 9TO NEW PROJECTS1 BECAUSE HE HAS ! IDLE DESIRE TO AMASS A L>GE =TUNE1 RA!R AN IMM5SE ONE1 M]ELY TO HAVE ! CR$IT ( HAV+ MADE IT4 ,BUT WE :O >E GOV]N$ BY O!R MOTIVES1 \RIVE AT ! SAME 5D4 ,IT APPE>S TO ME ABSURD TO WA/E LIFE 9 PREP>+ TO LIVE4 ,W\LD IT NOT N[ BE POSSIBLE TO >RANGE Y\R BUS9ESS 9 SU* A MANN] AS TO AVOID ! 9QUIETUDES1 ( :I* ,I HAVE HAD MY %>E S9CE Y\R DEP>TURE8 ,IS IT NOT POSSIBLE TO 5T] 9TO BUS9ESS1 AS AN EMPLOYM5T NECESS>Y TO KEEP ! FACULTIES AWAKE1 & 7TO S9K A LITTLE 9 ! EXPRESSIONS7 ! POT BOIL+1 )\T SUFF]+ :AT MU/ EV] BE CONSID]$ AS A SECOND>Y OBJECT1 TO 5GROSS ! M9D1 & DRIVE S5TIM5T & AFFECTION \T ( ! HE>T8 ,I AM 9 A HURRY TO GIVE ?IS LETT] TO ! P]SON :O HAS PROMIS$ TO =W>D IT ) ------'S4 ,I WI% !N TO C\NT]ACT1 9 SOME MEASURE1 :AT HE HAS D\BTLESS RECOMM5D$ MO/ W>MLY4 ,/AY1 MY FRI5D1 :IL/ IT IS ABSOLUTELY NECESS>Y4--,I WILL GIVE Y\ NO T5D]] NAME1 ?\< IT GL[S AT MY HE>T1 UNLESS Y\ COME ! MOM5T ! SETTL+ ! PRES5T OBJECTS P]MIT4--,I DO NOT CONS5T TO Y\R TAK+ ANY O!R J\RNEY--OR ! LITTLE WOMAN & ,I WILL BE (F1 ! ,LORD KN[S :]E4 ,BUT1 AS ,I HAD RA!R [E EV]Y ?+ TO Y\R AFFECTION1 &1 ,I MAY ADD1 TO Y\R REASON1 7= ?IS IMMOD]ATE DESIRE ( WEAL?1 :I* MAKES ------ SO EAG] TO HAVE Y\ REMA91 IS CONTR>Y TO Y\R PR9CIPLES ( ACTION71 ,I WILL NOT IMPORTUNE Y\4--,I WILL ONLY TELL Y\1 ?AT ,I LONG TO SEE Y\--&1 BE+ AT PEACE ) Y\1 ,I %ALL BE HURT1 RA!R ?AN MADE ANGRY1 BY DELAYS4--,HAV+ SUFF]$ SO MU* 9 LIFE1 DO NOT BE SURPRIS$ IF ,I SOMETIMES1 :5 LEFT TO MYSELF1 GR[ GLOOMY1 & SUPPOSE ?AT IT WAS ALL A DREAM1 & ?AT MY HAPP9ESS IS NOT TO LA/4 ,I SAY HAPP9ESS1 BECAUSE REMEMBRANCE RETR5*ES ALL ! D>K %ADES ( ! PICTURE4 ,MY LITTLE ONE BEG9S TO %[ H] TEE?1 & USE H] LEGS--,%E WANTS Y\ TO BE> Y\R P>T 9 ! NURS+ BUS9ESS1 = ,I AM FATIGU$ ) DANC+ H]1 & YET %E IS NOT SATISFI$--%E WANTS Y\ TO ?ANK H] MO!R = TAK+ SU* C>E ( H]1 AS Y\ ONLY CAN4 ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #c ,DECEMB] #b#i4 ,?\< ,I SUPPOSE Y\ HAVE LAT] 9TELLIG5CE1 YET1 AS ------ HAS JU/ 9=M$ ME ?AT HE HAS AN OPPORTUNITY ( S5D+ IMM$IATELY TO Y\1 ,I TAKE ADVANTAGE ( IT TO 5CLOSE Y\ -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,H[ ,I HATE ?IS CROOK$ BUS9ESS6 ,?IS 9T]C\RSE ) ! WORLD1 :I* OBLIGES ONE TO SEE ! WOR/ SIDE ( HUMAN NATURE6 ,:Y CANNOT Y\ BE CONT5T ) ! OBJECT Y\ HAD FIR/ 9 VIEW1 :5 Y\ 5T]$ 9TO ?IS WE>ISOME LABYR9?8--,I KN[ V]Y WELL ?AT Y\ HAVE IMP]CEPTIBLY BE5 DRAWN ON2 YET :Y DOES ONE PROJECT1 SUCCESSFUL OR ABORTIVE1 ONLY GIVE PLACE TO TWO O!RS8 ,IS IT NOT SUFFICI5T TO AVOID POV]TY8--,I AM CONT5T$ TO DO MY P>T2 &1 EV5 H]E1 SUFFICI5T TO ESCAPE FROM WRET*$NESS IS NOT DIFFICULT TO OBTA94 ,&1 LET ME TELL Y\1 ,I HAVE MY PROJECT ALSO--&1 IF Y\ DO NOT SOON RETURN1 ! LITTLE GIRL & ,I WILL TAKE C>E ( \RSELVES2 WE WILL NOT ACCEPT ANY ( Y\R COLD K9DNESS--Y\R DI/ANT CIVILITIES--NO2 NOT WE4 ,?IS IS BUT HALF JE/+1 = ,I AM REALLY TORM5T$ BY ! DESIRE :I* ------ MANIFE/S TO HAVE Y\ REMA9 :]E Y\ >E4--,YET :Y DO ,I TALK TO Y\8--,IF HE CAN P]SUADE Y\--LET HIM6--=1 IF Y\ >E NOT HAPPI] ) ME1 & Y\R [N WI%ES DO NOT MAKE Y\ ?R[ ASIDE !SE ET]NAL PROJECTS1 ,I AM ABOVE US+ ANY >GUM5TS1 ?\< REASON AS WELL AS AFFECTION SEEMS TO (F] !M--IF \R AFFECTION BE MUTUAL1 !Y WILL OCCUR TO Y\--& Y\ WILL ACT ACCORD+LY4 ,S9CE MY >RIVAL H]E1 ,I HAVE F\ND ! ,G]MAN LADY1 ( :OM Y\ HAVE HE>D ME SPEAK4 ,H] FIR/ *ILD DI$ 9 ! MON?2 BUT %E HAS ANO!R1 AB\T ! AGE ( MY ------1 A F9E LITTLE CREATURE4 ,!Y >E /ILL BUT CONTRIV+ TO LIVE----E>N+ !IR DAILY BREAD--YET1 ?\< !Y >E BUT JU/ ABOVE POV]TY1 ,I 5VY !M4--,%E IS A T5D]1 AFFECTIONATE MO!R--FATIGU$ EV5 BY H] ATT5TION4--,H[EV] %E HAS AN AFFECTIONATE HUSB& 9 H] TURN1 TO R5D] H] C>E LIE H] PLEASURE4 ,I WILL [N TO Y\ ?AT1 FEEL+ EXTREME T5D]NESS = MY LITTLE GIRL1 ,I GR[ SAD V]Y (T5 :5 ,I AM PLAY+ ) H]1 ?AT Y\ >E NOT H]E1 TO OBS]VE ) ME H[ H] M9D UNFOLDS1 & H] LITTLE HE>T BECOMES ATTA*$6--,!SE APPE> TO ME TO BE TRUE PLEASURES--& /ILL Y\ SUFF] !M TO ESCAPE Y\1 9 SE>* ( :AT WE MAY NEV] 5JOY4--,IT IS Y\R [N MAXIM TO 0LIVE 9 ! PRES5T MOM5T40--,IF Y\ DO--/AY1 = ,GOD'S SAKE2 BUT TELL ME ! TRU?--IF NOT1 TELL ME :5 ,I MAY EXPECT TO SEE Y\1 & LET ME NOT BE ALWAYS VA9LY LOOK+ = Y\1 TILL ,I GR[ SICK AT HE>T4 ,ADIEU6 ,I AM A LITTLE HURT4--,I MU/ TAKE MY D>L+ TO MY BOSOM TO COM=T ME4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ca ,DECEMB] #c4 ,%\LD Y\ RECEIVE ?REE OR F\R ( ! LETT]S AT ONCE :I* ,I HAVE WRITT5 LATELY1 DO NOT ?9K ( ,SIR ,JOHN ,BRUTE1 = ,I DO NOT MEAN TO WIFE Y\4 ,I ONLY TAKE ADVANTAGE ( EV]Y OCCASION1 ?AT ONE \T ( ?REE ( MY EPI/LES MAY REA* Y\R H&S1 & 9=M Y\ ?AT ,I AM NOT ( ------'S OP9ION1 :O TALKS TILL HE MAKES ME ANGRY1 ( ! NECESSITY ( Y\R /AY+ TWO OR ?REE MON?S LONG]4 ,I DO NOT LIKE ?IS LIFE ( CONT9UAL 9QUIETUDE--&1 5TRE N\S1 ,I AM DET]M9$ TO TRY TO E>N SOME MONEY H]E MYSELF1 9 ORD] TO CONV9CE Y\ ?AT1 IF Y\ *USE TO RUN AB\T ! WORLD TO GET A =TUNE1 IT IS = Y\RSELF--= ! LITTLE GIRL & ,I WILL LIVE )\T Y\R ASSI/ANCE1 UNLESS Y\ >E ) US4 ,I MAY BE T]M$ PR\D--,BE IT SO--BUT ,I WILL NEV] AB&ON C]TA9 PR9CIPLES ( ACTION4 ,! COMMON RUN ( M5 HAVE SU* AN IGNOBLE WAY ( ?9K+1 ?AT1 IF !Y DEBAU* !IR HE>TS1 & PRO/ITUTE !IR P]SONS1 FOLL[+ P]HAPS A GU/ ( 9EBRIATION1 !Y SUPPOSE ! WIFE1 SLAVE RA!R1 :OM !Y MA9TA91 HAS NO RIMS1 ?\< HIS HAVE BE5 POLLUT$ BY HALF AN HUNDR$ PROMISCU\S AM\RS DUR+ HIS ABS5CE4 ,I CONSID] FIDELITY & CON/ANCY AS TWO DI/9CT ?+S2 YET ! =M] IS NECESS>Y1 TO GIVE LIFE TO ! O!R--& SU* A DEGREE ( RESPECT DO ,I ?9K DUE TO MYSELF1 ?AT1 IF ONLY PROBITY1 :I* IS A GOOD ?+ 9 ITS PLACE1 BR+S Y\ BACK1 NEV] RETURN6--=1 IF A W&]+ ( ! HE>T1 OR EV5 A CAPRICE ( ! IMAG9ATION DETA9S Y\--!RE IS AN 5D ( ALL MY HOPES ( HAPP9ESS--,I C\LD NOT =GIVE IT1 IF ,I W\LD4 ,I HAVE GOTT5 9TO A MELAN*OLY MOOD1 Y\ P]CEIVE4 ,Y\ KN[ MY OP9ION ( M5 9 G5]AL2 Y\ KN[ ?AT ,I ?9K !M SY/EMATIC TYRANTS1 & ?AT IT IS ! R>E/ ?+ 9 ! WORLD1 TO MEET ) A MAN ) SUFFICI5T DELICACY ( FEEL+ TO GOV]N DESIRE4 ,:5 ,I AM ?US SAD1 ,I LAM5T ?AT MY LITTLE D>L+1 FONDLY AS ,I DOAT ON H]1 IS A GIRL4--,I AM SORRY TO HAVE A TIE TO A WORLD ?AT = ME IS EV] S[N ) ?ORNS4 ,Y\ WILL CALL ?IS AN ILL-HUMOR$ LETT]1 :51 9 FACT1 IT IS ! /RONGE/ PRO( ( AFFECTION ,I CAN GIVE1 TO DREAD TO LOSE Y\4 ------ HAS TAK5 SU* PA9S TO CONV9CE ME ?AT Y\ MU/ & \$1 ?AT TWO PEOPLE1 :O MEAN TO LIVE TOGE!R1 \AT$4--,IF C]TA9 ?+S >E MORE NECESS>Y TO Y\ ?AN ME--SE>* = !M--,SAY BUT ONE WORD1 & Y\ %ALL NEV] HE> ( ME MORE4--,IF NOT--= ,GOD'S SAKE1 LET US /RUGGLE ) POV]TY--) ANY EVIL1 BUT !SE CONT9UAL 9QUIETUDES ( BUS9ESS1 :I* ,I HAVE BE5 TOLD W]E TO LA/ BUT A FEW MON?S1 ?\< EV]Y DAY ! 5D APPE>S MORE DI/ANT6 ,?IS IS ! FIR/ LETT] 9 ?IS /RA9 ?AT ,I HAVE DET]M9$ TO =W>D TO Y\2 ! RE/ LIE BY1 BECAUSE ,I WAS UNWILL+ TO GIVE Y\ PA91 & ,I %\LD NOT N[ WRITE1 IF ,I DID NOT ?9K ?AT !RE W\LD BE NO CONCLUSION TO ! S*EMES1 :I* DEM&1 AS ,I AM TOLD1 Y\R PRES5CE4 "9 "9 "9 "9.<#i#a-,A.> O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cb ,JANU>Y #i4 ,I JU/ N[ RECEIV$ ONE ( Y\R HA/Y NOTES2 = BUS9ESS SO 5TIRELY OCCUPIES Y\1 ?AT Y\ HAVE NOT TIME1 OR SUFFICI5T COMM& ( ?\E6 Y\ SEEM TO BE GOT 9TO A :IRL ( PROJECTS & S*EMES1 :I* >E DRAW+ Y\ 9TO A GULPH1 ?AT1 IF IT DO NOT ABSORB Y\R HAPP9ESS1 WILL 9FALLIBLY DE/ROY M9E4 ,FATIGU$ DUR+ MY Y\? BY ! MO/ >DU\S /RUGGLES1 NOT ONLY TO OBTA9 9DEP5D5CE1 BUT TO R5D] MYSELF USEFUL1 NOT M]ELY PLEASURE1 = :I* ,I HAD ! MO/ LIVELY TA/E1 ,I MEAN ! SIMPLE PLEASURES ?AT FL[ FROM PASSION & AFFECTION1 ESCAP$ ME1 BUT ! MO/ MELAN*OLY VIEWS ( LIFE W]E IMPRESS$ BY A DISAPPO9T$ HE>T ON MY M9D4 ,S9CE ,I KNEW Y\1 ,I HAVE BE5 5DEAVOR+ TO GO BACK TO MY =M] NATURE1 & HAVE ALL[$ SOME TIME TO GLIDE AWAY1 W+$ ) ! DELIM8 ,I AM REALLY UNABLE TO BE> ! CONT9UAL 9QUIETUDE :I* Y\R & ------'S NEV]-5D+ PLANS PRODUCE4 ,?IS Y\ MAY T]M WANT ( FIRMNESS--BUT Y\ >E MI/AK5--,I HAVE /ILL SUFFICI5T FIRMNESS TO PURSUE MY PR9CIPLE ( ACTION4 ,! PRES5T MIS]Y1 ,I CANNOT F9D A S(T] WORD TO DO JU/ICE TO MY FEEL+S1 APPE>S TO ME UNNECESS>Y--& !RE=E ,I HAVE NOT FIRMNESS TO SUPPORT IT AS Y\ MAY ?9K ,I \M--,MY ,GOD6 ANY ?+1 BUT !SE CONT9UAL ANXIETIES--ANY ?+ BUT COMM]CE1 :I* DEBASES ! M9D1 & ROOTS \T AFFECTION FROM ! HE>T4 ,I DO NOT MEAN TO COMPLA9 ( SUBORD9ATE 9CONV5I5CES----YET ,I WILL SIMPLY OBS]VE1 ?AT1 L$ TO EXPECT Y\ EV]Y WEEK1 ,I DID NOT MAKE ! >RANGEM5TS REQUIR$ BY ! PRES5T CIRCUM/ANCES1 TO PROCURE ! NECESS>IES ( LIFE4 ,9 ORD] TO HAVE !M1 A S]VANT1 = ?AT PURPOSE ONLY1 IS 9DISP5SIBLE--,! WANT ( WOOD1 HAS MADE ME CAT* ! MO/ VIOL5T COLD ,I EV] HAD2 & MY HEAD IS SO DI/URB$ BY CONT9UAL C\<+1 ?AT ,I AM UNABLE TO WRITE )\T /OPP+ FREQU5TLY TO RECOLLECT MYSELF4--,?IS H[EV] IS ONE ( ! COMMON EVILS :I* MU/ BE BORNE )----BODILY PA9 DOES NOT T\* ! HE>T1 ?\< IT FATIGUES ! SPIRITS4 ,/ILL AS Y\ TALK ( Y\R RETURN1 EV5 9 ,FEBRU>Y1 D\BT+LY1 ,I HAVE DET]M9$1 ! MOM5T ! WEA!R *ANGES1 TO WEAN MY *ILD4--,IT IS TOO SOON = H] TO BEG9 TO DIVIDE SORR[6--,& AS ONE HAS WELL SAID1 0DESPAIR IS A FREEMAN10 WE WILL GO & SEEK \R =TUNE TOGE!R4 ,?IS IS NOT A CAPRICE ( ! MOM5T--= Y\R ABS5CE HAS GIV5 NEW WEIY OBJECT4--,IF Y\R FEEL+S W]E 9 UNISON ) M9E1 Y\ W\LD NOT SACRIFICE SO MU* TO VISION>Y PROSPECTS ( FUTURE ADVANTAGE4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cc ,JAN4 #a#e4 ,I WAS JU/ GO+ TO BEG9 MY LETT] ) ! FAG 5D ( A SONG1 :I* W\LD ONLY HAVE TOLD Y\1 :AT ,I MAY AS WELL SAY SIMPLY1 ?AT IT IS PLEASANT TO =GIVE ?OSE WE LOVE4 ,I HAVE RECEIV$ Y\R TWO LETT]S1 DAT$ ! #b#f? & #b#h? ( ,DECEMB]1 & MY ANG] DI$ AWAY4 ,Y\ CAN SC>CELY CONCEIVE ! EFFECT SOME ( Y\R LETT]S HAVE PRODUC$ ON ME4 ,AFT] LONG+ TO HE> FROM Y\ DUR+ A T$I\S 9T]VAL ( SUSP5SE1 ,I HAVE SE5 A SUP]SCRIPTION WRITT5 BY Y\4--,PROMIS+ MYSELF PLEASURE1 & FEEL+ EMOTION1 ,I HAVE LAID IT BY ME1 TILL ! P]SON :O BR\D A CRU/ = TWO H\RS2 &1 AFT] FIX+ H] EYE ON AN OBJECT = SOME TIME1 D>T ON IT ) AN AIM AS SURE AS A BIRD ( PREY--NO?+ CAN EQUAL H] LIFE & SPIRITS4 ,I SUFF] FROM A COLD2 BUT IT DOES NOT AFFECT H]4 ,ADIEU6 DO NOT =GET TO LOVE US--& COME SOON TO TELL US ?AT Y\ DO4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cd ,JAN4 #c4 ,FROM ! PURPORT ( Y\R LA/ LETT]S1 ,I W\LD SUPPOSE ?AT ?IS WILL SC>CELY REA* Y\2 & ,I HAVE ALREADY WRITT5 SO MANY LETT]S1 ?AT Y\ HAVE EI!R NOT RECEIV$1 OR NEGLECT$ TO ACKN[L$GE1 ,I DO NOT F9D IT PLEASANT1 OR RA!R ,I HAVE NO 9CL9ATION1 TO GO OV] ! SAME GR\ND AGA94 ,IF Y\ HAVE RECEIV$ !M1 & >E /ILL DETA9$ BY NEW PROJECTS1 IT IS USELESS = ME TO SAY ANY MORE ON ! SUBJECT4 ,I HAVE DONE ) IT = EV]--YET ,I \Y 9T]E/ SUFF]S BY Y\R ABS5CE4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,= MY P>T1 MY HEAD IS TURN$ GIDDY1 BY ONLY HE>+ ( PLANS TO MAKE MONEY1 & MY CONTEMPTU\S FEEL+S HAVE SOMETIMES BUR/ \T4 ,I !RE=E WAS GLAD ?AT A VIOL5T COLD GAVE ME A PRETEXT TO /AY AT HOME1 LE/ ,I %\LD HAVE UTT]$ UNSEASONABLE TRU?S4 ,MY *ILD IS WELL1 & ! SPR+ WILL P]HAPS RE/ORE ME TO MYSELF4--,I HAVE 5DUR$ MANY 9CONV5I5CES ?IS W9T]1 :I* %\LD ,I BE A%AM$ TO M5TION1 IF !Y HAD BE5 UNAVOIDABLE4 0,! SECOND>Y PLEASURES ( LIFE10 Y\ SAY1 0>E V]Y NECESS>Y TO MY COM=T30 IT MAY BE SO2 BUT ,I HAVE EV] CONSID]$ !M AS SECOND>Y4 ,IF !RE=E Y\ ACCUSE ME ( WANT+ ! RESOLUTION NECESS>Y TO BE> ! COMMON.<#a-,A.> EVILS ( LIFE2 ,I %\LD ANSW]1 ?AT ,I HAVE NOT FA%ION$ MY M9D TO SU/A9 !M1 BECAUSE ,I W\LD AVOID !M1 CO/ :AT IT W\LD---- ,ADIEU6 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ce ,FEBRU>Y #i4 ,! MELAN*OLY PRES5TIM5T HAS = SOME TIME HUNG ON MY SPIRITS1 ?AT WE W]E P>T$ = EV]2 & ! LETT]S ,I RECEIV$ ?IS DAY1 BY ,MR4 ----1 CONV9CE ME ?AT IT WAS NOT )\T F\NDATION4 ,Y\ ALLUDE TO SOME O!R LETT]S1 :I* ,I SUPPOSE HAVE MISC>RI$2 = MO/ ( ?OSE ,I HAVE GOT1 W]E ONLY A FEW HA/Y L9ES1 CALCULAT$ TO W\ND ! T5D]NESS ! SIE /RUGGL+ = UTT]ANCE1 & AGITAT+ A HE>T ALMO/ BUR/+ ) ANGUI%1 ?AT ,I F9D IT V]Y DIFFICULT TO WRITE ) ANY DEGREE ( COH]5CE4 ,Y\ LEFT ME 9DISPOS$1 ?\< Y\ HAVE TAK5 NO NOTICE ( IT2 & ! MO/ FATIGU+ J\RNEY ,I EV] HAD1 CONTRIBUT$ TO CONT9UE IT4 ,H[EV]1 ,I RECOV]$ MY HEAL?2 BUT A NEGLECT$ COLD1 & CONT9UAL 9QUIETUDE DUR+ ! LA/ TWO MON?S1 HAVE R$UC$ ME TO A /ATE ( WEAKNESS ,I NEV] BE=E EXP]I5C$4 ,?OSE :O DID NOT KN[ ?AT ! CANK]-WORM WAS AT WORK AT ! CORE1 CAUTION$ ME AB\T SUCKL+ MY *ILD TOO LONG4--,GOD PRES]VE ?IS POOR *ILD1 & R5D] H] HAPPI] ?AN H] MO!R6 ,BUT ,I AM W&]+ FROM MY SUBJECT3 9DE$ MY HEAD TURNS GIDDY1 :5 ,I ?9K ?AT ALL ! CONFID5CE ,I HAVE HAD 9 ! AFFECTION ( O!RS IS COME TO ?IS4 ,I DID NOT EXPECT ?IS BL[ FROM Y\4 ,I HAVE DONE MY DUTY TO Y\ & MY *ILD2 & IF ,I AM NOT TO HAVE ANY RETURN ( AFFECTION TO REW>D ME1 ,I HAVE ! SAD CONSOLATION ( KN[+ ?AT ,I DES]V$ A BETT] FATE4 ,MY S\L IS WE>Y--,I AM SICK AT HE>T2 &1 BUT = ?IS LITTLE D>L+1 ,I W\LD CEASE TO C>E AB\T A LIFE1 :I* IS N[ /RIPP$ ( EV]Y *>M4 ,Y\ SEE H[ /UPID ,I AM1 UTT]+ DECLAMATION1 :5 ,I MEANT SIMPLY TO TELL Y\1 ?AT ,I CONSID] Y\R REQUE/+ ME TO COME TO Y\1 AS M]ELY DICTAT$ BY HONOR4--,9DE$1 ,I SC>CELY UND]/& Y\4--,Y\ REQUE/ ME TO COME1 & !N TELL ME1 ?AT Y\ HAVE NOT GIV5 UP ALL ?\E POV]TY ) Y\1 BUT ,I TURN ) AFFRIE 5T]+4--,I HAVE C]TA9 PR9CIPLES ( ACTION3 ,I KN[ :AT ,I LOOK = TO F\ND MY HAPP9ESS ON4--,IT IS NOT MONEY4--,) Y\ ,I WI%$ = SUFFICI5T TO PROCURE ! COM=TS ( LIFE--AS IT IS1 LESS WILL DO4--,I CAN /ILL EX]T MYSELF TO OBTA9 ! NECESS>IES ( LIFE = MY *ILD1 & %E DOES NOT WANT MORE AT PRES5T4--,I HAVE TWO OR ?REE PLANS 9 MY HEAD TO E>N \R SUBSI/5CE2 = DO NOT SUPPOSE ?AT1 NEGLECT$ BY Y\1 ,I WILL LIE UND] OBLIGATIONS ( A PECUNI>Y K9D TO Y\6--,NO2 ,I W\LD SOON] SUBMIT TO M5IAL S]VICE4--,I WANT$ ! SUPPORT ( Y\R AFFECTION--?AT GONE1 ALL IS OV]6--,I DID NOT ?9K1 :5 ,I COMPLA9$ ( ----'S CONTEMPTIBLE AVIDITY TO ACCUMULATE MONEY1 ?AT HE W\LD HAVE DRAGG$ Y\ 9TO HIS S*EMES4 ,I CANNOT WRITE4--,I 5CLOSE A FRAGM5T ( A LETT]1 WRITT5 SOON AFT] Y\R DEP>TURE1 & ANO!R :I* T5D]NESS MADE ME KEEP BACK :5 IT WAS WRITT54--,Y\ WILL SEE !N ! S5TIM5TS ( A CALM]1 ?\< NOT A MORE DET]M9$1 MOM5T4--,DO NOT 9SULT ME BY SAY+1 ?AT 0\R BE+ TOGE!R IS P>AM\NT TO EV]Y O!R CONSID]ATION60 ,W]E IT1 Y\ W\LD NOT BE RUNN+ AFT] A BUBBLE1 AT ! EXP5CE ( MY PEACE ( M9D4 ,P]HAPS ?IS IS ! LA/ LETT] Y\ WILL EV] RECEIVE FROM ME4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cf ,FEB4 #a4 ,Y\ TALK ( 0P]MAN5T VIEWS & FUTURE COM=T0--NOT = ME1 = ,I AM DEAD TO HOPE4 ,! 9QUIETUDES ( ! LA/ W9T] HAVE F9I%$ ! BUS9ESS1 & MY HE>T IS NOT ONLY BROK51 BUT MY CON/ITUTION DE/ROY$4 ,I CONCEIVE MYSELF 9 A GALLOP+ CONSUMPTION1 & ! CONT9UAL ANXIETY ,I FEEL AT ! ?\D ME M5TION6 ,%E HAS A *ILD ( ! SAME AGE1 & !Y MAY BE BR\GU$ AB\T ! PROPRIETY ( Y\R REMA9+ :]E Y\ >E2 & IT IS NO MATT]1 ,I HAVE DRUNK TOO DEEP ( ! BITT] CUP TO C>E AB\T TRIFLES4 ,:5 Y\ FIR/ 5T]$ 9TO !SE PLANS1 Y\ B\ND$ Y\R VIEWS TO ! GA9+ ( A ?\S& P\NDS4 ,IT WAS SUFFICI5T TO HAVE PROCUR$ A F>M 9 ,AM]ICA1 :I* W\LD HAVE BE5 AN 9DEP5D5CE4 ,Y\ F9D N[ ?AT Y\ DID NOT KN[ Y\RSELF1 & ?AT A C]TA9 SITUATION 9 LIFE IS MORE NECESS>Y TO Y\ ?AN Y\ IMAG9$--MORE NECESS>Y ?AN AN UNCORRUPT$ HE>T--,= A YE> OR TWO1 Y\ MAY PROCURE Y\RSELF :AT Y\ CALL PLEASURE2 EAT+1 DR9K+1 & WOM52 BUT1 9 ! SOLITUDE ( DECL9+ LIFE1 ,I %ALL BE REMEMB]$ ) REGRET--,I WAS GO+ TO SAY ) REMORSE1 BUT *ECK$ MY P54 ,AS ,I HAVE NEV] CONCEAL$ ! NATURE ( MY CONNECTION ) Y\1 Y\R REPUTATION WILL NOT SUFF]4 ,I %ALL NEV] HAVE A CONFID5T3 ,I AM CONT5T ) ! APPROBATION ( MY [N M9D2 &1 IF !RE BE A SE>*] ( HE>TS1 M9E WILL NOT BE DESPIS$4 ,READ+ :AT Y\ HAVE WRITT5 RELATIVE TO ! DES]TION ( WOM51 ,I HAVE (T5 WOND]$ H[ !ORY & PRACTICE C\LD BE SO DIFF]5T1 TILL ,I RECOLLECT$1 ?AT ! S5TIM5TS ( PASSION1 & ! RESOLVES ( REASON1 >E V]Y DI/9CT4 ,AS TO MY SI/]S1 AS Y\ >E SO CONT9UALLY HURRI$ ) BUS9ESS1 Y\ NE$ NOT WRITE TO !M--,I %ALL1 :5 MY M9D IS CALM]4 ,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,ADIEU6 "9 "9 "9 "9 ,?IS HAS BE5 SU* A P]IOD ( B>B>ITY & MIS]Y1 ,I \E4 ,I WI% ONE MOM5T ?AT ,I HAD NEV] HE>D ( ! CRUELTIES ?AT HAVE BE5 PRACTIC$ H]E1 & ! NEXT 5VY ! MO!RS :O HAVE BE5 KILL$ ) !IR *ILDR54 ,SURELY ,I HAD SUFF]$ 5\< 9 LIFE1 NOT TO BE CURS$ ) A FONDNESS1 ?AT BURNS UP ! VITAL /REAM ,I AM IMP>T+4 ,Y\ WILL ?9K ME MAD3 ,I W\LD ,I W]E SO1 ?AT ,I C\LD =GET MY MIS]Y--SO ?AT MY HEAD OR HE>T W\LD BE /ILL4---- O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #cg ,FEB4 #a#i4 ,:5 ,I FIR/ RECEIV$ Y\R LETT]1 PUTT+ (F Y\R RETURN TO AN 9DEF9ITE TIME1 ,I FELT SO HURT1 ?AT ,I KN[ NOT :AT ,I WROTE4 ,I AM N[ CALM]1 ?\< IT WAS NOT ! K9D ( W\ND OV] :I* TIME HAS ! QUICKE/ EFFECT2 ON ! CONTR>Y1 ! MORE ,I ?9K1 ! SADD] ,I GR[4 ,SOCIETY FATIGUES ME 9EXPRESSIBLY--,SO MU* SO1 ?AT F9D+ FAULT ) EV]Y ONE1 ,I HAVE ONLY REASON 5\<1 TO DISCOV] ?AT ! FAULT IS 9 MYSELF4 ,MY *ILD ALONE 9T]E/S ME1 &1 BUT = H]1 ,I %\LD NOT TAKE ANY PA9S TO RECOV] MY HEAL?4 ,AS IT IS1 ,I %ALL WEAN H]1 & TRY IF BY ?AT /EP 7TO :I* ,I FEEL A REPUGNANCE1 = IT IS MY ONLY SOLACE7 ,I CAN GET RID ( MY C\<4 ,PHYSICIANS TALK MU* ( ! DANG] ATT5D+ ANY COMPLA9T ON ! LUNGS1 AFT] A WOMAN HAS SUCKL$ = SOME MON?S4 ,!Y LAY A /RESS ALSO ON ! NECESSITY ( KEEP+ ! M9D TRANQUIL--&1 MY ,GOD6 H[ HAS M9E BE5 H>RASS$6 ,BUT :IL/ ! CAPRICES ( O!R WOM5 >E GRATIFI$1 0! W9D ( HEAV5 NOT SUFF]$ TO VISIT !M TOO RUDELY10 ,I HAVE NOT F\ND A GU>DIAN ANGEL1 9 HEAV5 OR ON E>?1 TO W>D (F SORR[ OR C>E FROM MY BOSOM4 ,:AT SACRIFICES HAVE Y\ NOT MADE = A WOMAN Y\ DID NOT RESPECT6--,BUT ,I WILL NOT GO OV] ?IS GR\ND--,I WANT TO TELL Y\ ?AT ,I DO NOT UND]/& Y\4 ,Y\ SAY ?AT Y\ HAVE NOT GIV5 UP ALL ?\Y--NAY1 IS4 ,I CANNOT EXPLA9 MYSELF2 BUT IF Y\ HAVE NOT LO/ Y\R MEMORY1 Y\ WILL EASILY DIV9E MY MEAN+4 ,:AT6 IS \R LIFE !N ONLY TO BE MADE UP ( SEP>ATIONS8 & AM ,I ONLY TO RETURN TO A C\NTRY1 ?AT HAS NOT M]ELY LO/ ALL *>MS = ME1 BUT = :I* ,I FEEL A REPUGNANCE ?AT ALMO/ AM\NTS TO HORROR1 ONLY TO BE LEFT !RE A PREY TO IT6 ,:Y IS IT SO NECESS>Y ?AT ,I %\LD RETURN8--BR\T1 ,I C\LD COMPLA9 ) REASON1 ?AT ,I AM LEFT H]E DEP5D5T ON A MAN1 :OSE AVIDITY TO ACQUIRE A =TUNE HAS R5D]$ HIM CALL\S TO EV]Y S5TIM5T CONNECT$ ) SOCIAL OR AFFECTIONATE EMOTIONS4--,) A BRUTAL 9S5SIBILITY1 HE CANNOT HELP DISPLAY+ ! PLEASURE Y\R DET]M9ATION TO /AY GIVES HIM1 9 SPITE ( ! EFFECT IT IS VISIBLE IT HAS HAD ON ME4 ,TILL ,I CAN E>N MONEY1 ,I %ALL 5DEAVOR TO BORR[ SOME1 = ,I WANT TO AVOID ASK+ HIM CONT9UALLY = ! SUM NECESS>Y TO MA9TA9 ME4--,DO NOT MI/AKE ME1 ,I HAVE NEV] BE5 REFUS$4--,YET ,I HAVE GONE HALF A DOZ5 TIMES TO ! H\SE TO ASK = IT1 & COME AWAY )\T SPEAK+----Y\ MU/ GUESS :Y--,BESIDES1 ,I WI% TO AVOID HE>+ ( ! ET]NAL PROJECTS TO :I* Y\ HAVE SACRIFIC$ MY PEACE--NOT REMEMB]+--BUT ,I WILL BE SIL5T = EV]4---- O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #* ,APRIL #g4 ,H]E ,I AM AT ,H----1 ON ! W+ T[>DS Y\1 & ,I WRITE N[1 ONLY TO TELL Y\1 ?AT Y\ MAY EXPECT ME 9 ! C\RSE ( ?REE OR F\R DAYS2 = ,I %ALL NOT ATTEMPT TO GIVE V5T TO ! DIFF]5T EMOTIONS :I* AGITATE MY HE>T--,Y\ MAY T]M A FEEL+1 :I* APPE>S TO ME TO BE A DEGREE ( DELICACY ?AT NATURALLY >ISES FROM S5SIBILITY1 PRIDE--,/ILL ,I CANNOT 9DULGE ! V]Y AFFECTIONATE T5D]NESS :I* GL[S 9 MY BOSOM1 )\T TREMBL+1 TILL ,I SEE1 BY Y\R EYES1 ?AT IT IS MUTUAL4 ,I SIT1 LO/ 9 ?\S RU% 9TO MY EYES1 :5 ,I F9D ?AT ,I AM *]I%+ ANY FOND EXPECTATIONS4--,I HAVE 9DE$ BE5 SO UNHAPPY ?IS W9T]1 ,I F9D IT AS DIFFICULT TO ACQUIRE FRE% HOPES1 AS TO REGA9 TRANQUILITY4--,5\< ( ?IS--LIE /ILL1 FOOLI% HE>T6--,BUT = ! LITTLE GIRL1 ,I C\LD ALMO/ WI% ?AT IT %\LD CEASE TO BEAT1 TO BE NO MORE ALIVE TO ! ANGUI% ( DISAPPO9TM5T4 ,SWEET LITTLE CREATURE6 ,I DEPRIV$ MYSELF ( MY ONLY PLEASURE1 :5 ,I WEAN$ H]1 AB\T T5 DAYS AGO4--,I AM H[EV] GLAD ,I CONQU]$ MY REPUGNANCE4--,IT WAS NECESS>Y IT %\LD BE DONE SOON1 & ,I DID NOT WI% TO EMBITT] ! R5EWAL ( Y\R ACQUA9TANCE ) H]1 BY PUTT+ IT (F TILL WE MET4--,IT WAS A PA9FUL EX]TION TO ME1 & ,I ?\RIVE1 = ,I DO NOT SEE ANY NECESSITY = Y\R COM+ TO ME4--,PRAY 9=M ,MR4 ------1 ?AT ,I HAVE HIS LITTLE FRI5D ) ME4--,MY WI%+ TO OBLIGE HIM1 MADE ME PUT MYSELF TO SOME 9CONV5I5CE----& DELAY MY DEP>TURE2 :I* WAS IRKSOME TO ME1 :O HAVE NOT QUITE AS MU* PHILOSOPHY1 ,I W\LD NOT = ! WORLD SAY 9DIFF]5CE1 AS Y\4 ,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,Y\RS TRULY1 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ci ,BRIE1 MY LOVE1 & MEAN TO SET \T E>LY 9 ! MORN+2 &1 IF ,I CAN F9D Y\1 ,I HOPE TO D9E ) Y\ TO-MORR[4--,I %ALL DRIVE TO ------'S HOTEL1 :]E ------ TELLS ME Y\ HAVE BE5--&1 IF Y\ HAVE LEFT IT1 ,I HOPE Y\ WILL TAKE C>E TO BE !RE TO RECEIVE US4 ,I HAVE BR\E ( \R LITTLE D>L+--NOT ON ! WAY1 = ?AT FELL TO MY %>E4--,BUT :Y DO ,I WRITE AB\T TRIFLES8--OR ANY ?+8--,>E WE NOT TO MEET SOON8--,:AT DOES Y\R HE>T SAY6 ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,I HAVE WEAN$ MY ------1 & %E IS N[ EAT+ AWAY AT ! :ITE BREAD4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #d ,LONDON1 ,FRIDAY1 ,MAY #b#b4 ,I HAVE JU/ RECEIV$ Y\R AFFECTIONATE LETT]1 & AM DI/RESS$ TO ?9K ?AT ,I HAVE ADD$ TO Y\R EMB>RASSM5TS AT ?IS TR\BLESOME JUNCTURE1 :5 ! EX]TION ( ALL ! FACULTIES ( Y\R M9D APPE>S TO BE NECESS>Y1 TO EXTRICATE Y\ \T ( Y\R PECUNI>Y DIFFICULTIES4 ,I SUPPOSE IT WAS SOME?+ RELATIVE TO ! CIRCUM/ANCE Y\ HAVE M5TION$1 :I* MADE ------ REQUE/ TO SEE ME TO-DAY1 TO CONV]SE AB\T A MATT] ( GREAT IMPORTANCE4 ,BE ?AT AS IT MAY1 HIS LETT] 7SU* IS ! /ATE ( MY SPIRITS7 9CONCEIVABLY AL>M$ ME1 & R5D]$ ! LA/ NIE >GUM5TS :I* CONV9CE ! REASON1 :IL/ !Y C>RY DEA? TO ! HE>T4--,WE HAVE HAD TOO MANY CRUEL EXPLANATIONS1 ?AT NOT ONLY CL\D EV]Y FUTURE PROSPECT2 BUT EMBITT] ! REMEMBRANCES :I* ALONE GIVE LIFE TO AFFECTION4--,LET ! SUBJECT NEV] BE REVIV$6 ,IT SEEMS TO ME ?AT ,I HAVE NOT ONLY LO/ ! HOPE1 BUT ! P[] ( BE+ HAPPY4--,EV]Y EMOTION IS N[ %>P5$ BY ANGUI%4--,MY S\L HAS BE5 %OOK1 & MY TONE ( FEEL+S DE/ROY$4--,I HAVE GONE \T--& S\ FRI5D--EXAM9E Y\RSELF WELL--,I AM \T ( ! QUE/ION2 =1 ALAS6 ,I AM NO?+--& DISCOV] :AT Y\ WI% TO DO--:AT WILL R5D] Y\ MO/ COM=TABLE--OR1 TO BE MORE EXPLICIT--:E!R Y\ DESIRE TO LIVE ) ME1 OR P>T = EV]8 ,:5 Y\ CAN ONCE ASC]TA9 IT1 TELL ME FRANKLY1 ,I CONJURE Y\6--=1 BELIEVE ME1 ,I HAVE V]Y 9VOLUNT>ILY 9T]RUPT$ Y\R PEACE4 ,I %ALL EXPECT Y\ TO D9N] ON ,MONDAY1 & WILL 5DEAVOR TO ASSUME A *E]FUL FACE TO GREET Y\--AT ANY RATE ,I WILL AVOID CONV]SATIONS1 :I* ONLY T5D TO H>RASS Y\R FEEL+S1 BECAUSE ,I AM MO/ AFFECTIONATELY Y\RS1 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #da ,W$NESDAY4 ,I 5CLOSE Y\ ! LETT]1 :I* Y\ DESIR$ ME TO =W>D1 & ,I AM TEMPT$ V]Y LACONICALLY TO WI% Y\ A GOOD MORN+--NOT BECAUSE ,I AM ANGRY1 OR HAVE NO?+ TO SAY2 BUT TO KEEP D[N A W\ND$ SPIRIT4--,I %ALL MAKE EV]Y EF=T TO CALM MY M9D--YET A /RONG CONVICTION SEEMS TO :IRL R\ND 9 ! V]Y C5T] ( MY BRA91 :I*1 LIKE ! FIAT ( FATE1 EMPHATICALLY ASSURES ME1 ?AT GRIEF HAS A FIRM HOLD ( MY HE>T4 ,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #db --1 ,W$NESDAY1 ,TWO O',CLOCK4 ,WE >RIV$ H]E AB\T AN H\R AGO4 ,I AM EXTREMELY FATIGU$ ) ! *ILD1 :O W\LD NOT RE/ QUIET ) ANY BODY BUT ME1 DUR+ ! NIE H]E 9 A COM=TLESS1 DAMP ROOM1 9 A SORT ( A TOMB-LIKE H\SE4 ,?IS H[EV] ,I %ALL QUICKLY REM$Y1 =1 :5 ,I HAVE F9I%$ ?IS LETT]1 7:I* ,I MU/ DO IMM$IATELY1 BECAUSE ! PO/ GOES \T E>LY71 ,I %ALL SALLY =?1 & 9QUIRE AB\T A VESSEL & AN 9N4 ,I WILL NOT DI/RESS Y\ BY TALK+ ( ! DEPRESSION ( MY SPIRITS1 OR ! /RUGGLE ,I HAD TO KEEP ALIVE MY DY+ HE>T4--,IT IS EV5 N[ TOO FULL TO ALL[ ME TO WRITE ) COMPOSURE4--"9"9"9"9"91--DE> "9"9"9"9"91 --AM ,I ALWAYS TO BE TOSS$ AB\T ?US8--%ALL ,I NEV] F9D AN ASYLUM TO RE/ CONT5T$ 98 ,H[ CAN Y\ LOVE TO FLY AB\T CONT9UALLY--DROPP+ D[N1 AS IT W]E1 9 A NEW WORLD--COLD & /RANGE6--EV]Y O!R DAY8 ,:Y DO Y\ NOT ATTA* ?OSE T5D] EMOTIONS R\ND ! IDEA ( HOME1 :I* EV5 N[ DIM MY EYES8--,?IS ALONE IS AFFECTION--EV]Y ?+ ELSE IS ONLY HUMANITY1 ELECTRIFI$ BY SYMPA?Y4 ,I WILL WRITE TO Y\ AGA9 TO-MORR[1 :5 ,I KN[ H[ LONG ,I AM TO BE DETA9$--& HOPE TO GET A LETT] QUICKLY FROM Y\1 TO *E] Y\RS S9C]ELY & AFFECTIONATELY "9 "9 "9 "9 ------ IS PLAY+ NE> ME 9 HI< SPIRITS4 ,%E WAS SO PLEAS$ ) ! NOISE ( ! MAIL-HORN1 %E HAS BE5 CONT9UALLY IMITAT+ IT4----,ADIEU6 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dc ,?URSDAY4 ,A LADY HAS JU/ S5T TO (F] TO TAKE ME TO ------4 ,I HAVE !N ONLY A MOM5T TO EXCLAIM AGA9/ ! VAGUE MANN] 9 :I* PEOPLE GIVE 9=MATION -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,BUT :Y TALK ( 9CONV5I5CES1 :I* >E 9 FACT TRIFL+1 :5 COMP>$ ) ! S9K+ ( ! HE>T ,I HAVE FELT6 ,I DID NOT 9T5D TO T\* ?IS PA9FUL /R+--,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,Y\RS TRULY1 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dd ,FRIDAY1 ,JUNE #a#b4 ,I HAVE JU/ RECEIV$ Y\RS DAT$ ! #i?1 :I* ,I SUPPOSE WAS A MI/AKE1 = IT C\LD SC>CELY HAVE LOIT]$ SO LONG ON ! ROAD4 ,! G5]AL OBS]VATIONS :I* APPLY TO ! /ATE ( Y\R [N M9D1 APPE> TO ME JU/1 AS F> AS !Y GO2 & ,I %ALL ALWAYS CONSID] IT AS ONE ( ! MO/ S]I\S MIS=TUNES ( MY LIFE1 ?AT ,I DID NOT MEET Y\1 BE=E SATIETY HAD R5D]$ Y\R S5SES SO FA/IDI\S1 AS ALMO/ TO CLOSE UP EV]Y T5D] AV5UE ( S5TIM5T & AFFECTION ?AT LEADS TO Y\R SYMPA!TIC HE>T4 ,Y\ HAVE A HE>T1 MY FRI5D1 YET1 HURRI$ AWAY BY ! IMPETUOSITY ( 9F]IOR FEEL+S1 Y\ HAVE S\ EXCESSES1 = ?AT GRATIFICATION :I* ONLY ! HE>T CAN BE/[4 ,! COMMON RUN ( M51 ,I KN[1 ) /RONG HEAL? & GROSS APPETITES1 MU/ HAVE V>IETY TO BANI% 5NUI1 BECAUSE ! IMAG9ATION NEV] L5DS ITS MAGIC W&1 TO CONV]T APPETITE 9TO LOVE1 CEM5T$ BY ACCORD+ REASON4--,AH6 MY FRI5D1 Y\ KN[ NOT ! 9EFFABLE DELIISES FROM A UNISON ( AFFECTION & DESIRE1 :5 ! :OLE S\L & S5SES >E AB&ON$ TO A LIVELY IMAG9ATION1 ?AT R5D]S EV]Y EMOTION DELICATE & RAPTUR\S4 ,YES2 !SE >E EMOTIONS1 OV] :I* SATIETY HAS NO P[]1 & ! RECOLLECTION ( :I*1 EV5 DISAPPO9TM5T CANNOT DIS5*ANT2 BUT !Y DO NOT EXI/ )\T SELF-D5IAL4 ,!SE EMOTIONS1 MORE OR LESS /RONG1 APPE> TO ME TO BE ! DI/9CTIVE *>ACT]I/IC ( G5IUS1 ! F\NDATION ( TA/E1 & ( ?AT EXQUISITE RELI% = ! BEAUTIES ( NATURE1 ( :I* ! COMMON H]D ( EAT]S & DR9K]S & *ILD-BEGET]S1 C]TA9LY HAVE NO IDEA4 ,Y\ WILL SMILE AT AN OBS]VATION ?AT HAS JU/ OCCURR$ TO ME3--,I CONSID] ?OSE M9DS AS ! MO/ /RONG & ORIG9AL1 :OSE IMAG9ATION ACTS AS ! /IMULUS TO !IR S5SES4 ,WELL6 Y\ WILL ASK1 :AT IS ! RESULT ( ALL ?IS REASON+8 ,:Y ,I CANNOT HELP ?9K+ ?AT IT IS POSSIBLE = Y\1 HAV+ GREAT /R5G? ( M9D1 TO RETURN TO NATURE1 & REGA9 A SANITY ( CON/ITUTION1 & PURITY ( FEEL+--:I* W\LD OP5 Y\R HE>T TO ME4--,I W\LD FA9 RE/ !RE6 ,YET1 CONV9C$ MORE ?AN EV] ( ! S9C]ITY & T5D]NESS ( MY ATTA*M5T TO Y\1 ! 9VOLUNT>Y HOPES1 :I* A DET]M9ATION TO LIVE HAS REVIV$1 >E NOT SUFFICI5TLY /RONG TO DISSIPATE ! CL\D1 ?AT DESPAIR HAS SPREAD OV] FUTURITY4 ,I HAVE LOOK$ AT ! SEA1 & AT MY *ILD1 H>DLY D>+ TO [N TO MYSELF ! SECRET WI%1 ?AT IT MIT1 /ILL SO ALIVE TO ANGUI%1 MIT1 & OBSCURE MY SIE WE EV] TO MEET AGA98 & WILL Y\ 5DEAVOR TO R5D] ?AT MEET+ HAPPI] ?AN ! LA/8 ,WILL Y\ 5DEAVOR TO RE/RA9 Y\R CAPRICES1 9 ORD] TO GIVE VIGOR TO AFFECTION1 & TO GIVE PLAY TO ! *ECK$ S5TIM5TS ?AT NATURE 9T5D$ %\LD EXP& Y\R HE>T8 ,I CANNOT 9DE$1 )\T AGONY1 ?9K ( Y\R BOSOM'S BE+ CONT9UALLY CONTAM9AT$2 & BITT] >E ! TE>S :I* EXHAU/ MY EYES1 :5 ,I RECOLLECT :Y MY *ILD & ,I >E =C$ TO /RAY FROM ! ASYLUM1 9 :I*1 AFT] SO MANY /ORMS1 ,I HAD HOP$ TO RE/1 SMIL+ AT ANGRY FATE4--,!SE >E NOT COMMON SORR[S2 NOR CAN Y\ P]HAPS CONCEIVE1 H[ MU* ACTIVE =TITUDE IT REQUIRES TO LABOR P]PETUALLY TO BLUNT ! %AFTS ( DISAPPO9TM5T4 ,EXAM9E N[ Y\RSELF1 & ASC]TA9 :E!R Y\ CAN LIVE 9 SOME?+-LIKE A SETTL$ /ILE4 ,LET \R CONFID5CE 9 FUTURE BE UNB\ND$2 CONSID] :E!R Y\ F9D IT NECESS>Y TO SACRIFICE ME TO :AT Y\ T]M 0! ZE/ ( LIFE20 &1 :5 Y\ HAVE ONCE A CLE> VIEW ( Y\R [N MOTIVES1 ( Y\R [N 9C5TIVE TO ACTION1 DO NOT DECEIVE ME6 ,! TRA9 ( ?\T4 ,SATURDAY ,MORN+4 ,Y\R SECOND LETT] REA*$ ME AB\T AN H\R AGO4 ,Y\ W]E C]TA9LY WRONG1 9 SUPPOS+ ?AT ,I DID NOT M5TION Y\ ) RESPECT2 ?\<1 )\T MY BE+ CONSCI\S ( IT1 SOME SP>KS ( RES5TM5T MAY HAVE ANIMAT$ ! GLOOM ( DESPAIR--,YES2 ) LESS AFFECTION1 ,I %\LD HAVE BE5 MORE RESPECTFUL4 ,H[EV] ! REG>D :I* ,I HAVE = Y\1 IS SO UNEQUIVOCAL TO MYSELF1 ,I IMAG9E ?AT IT MU/ BE SUFFICI5TLY OBVI\S TO EV]Y BODY ELSE4 ,BESIDES1 ! ONLY LETT] ,I 9T5D$ = ! PUBLIC EYE WAS TO ----1 & ?AT ,I DE/ROY$ FROM DELICACY BE=E Y\ SAW !M1 BECAUSE IT WAS ONLY WRITT5 7( C\RSE W>MLY 9 Y\R PRAISE7 TO PREV5T ANY ODIUM BE+ ?R[N ON Y\.<#a#c#c-,A.>4 ,I AM H>RASS$ BY Y\R EMB>RASSM5TS1 & %ALL C]TA9LY USE ALL MY EF=TS1 TO MAKE ! BUS9ESS T]M9ATE TO Y\R SATISFACTION 9 :I* ,I AM 5GAG$4 ,MY FRI5D--MY DE>E/ FRI5D--,I FEEL MY FATE UNIT$ TO Y\RS BY ! MO/ SACR$ PR9CIPLES ( MY S\L1 & ! YE>NS (--YES1 ,I WILL SAY IT--A TRUE1 UNSOPHI/ICAT$ HE>T4 ,Y\RS MO/ TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,IF ! W9D BE FAIR1 ! CAPTA9 TALKS ( SAIL+ ON ,MONDAY2 BUT ,I AM AFRAID ,I %ALL BE DETA9$ SOME DAYS LONG]4 ,AT ANY RATE1 CONT9UE TO WRITE1 7,I WANT ?IS SUPPORT7 TILL Y\ >E SURE ,I AM :]E ,I CANNOT EXPECT A LETT]2 &1 IF ANY %\LD >RIVE AFT] MY DEP>TURE1 A G5TLEMAN 7NOT ,MR4 ----'S FRI5D1 ,I PROMISE Y\7 FROM :OM ,I HAVE RECEIV$ GREAT CIVILITIES1 WILL S5D !M AFT] ME4 ,DO WRITE BY EV]Y OCCASION6 ,I AM ANXI\S TO HE> H[ Y\R AFFAIRS GO ON2 &1 /ILL MORE1 TO BE CONV9C$ ?AT Y\ >E NOT SEP>AT+ Y\RSELF FROM US4 ,= MY LITTLE D>L+ IS CALL+ PAPA1 & ADD+ H] P>ROT WORD--,COME1 ,COME6 ,& WILL Y\ NOT COME1 & LET US EX]T \RSELVES8--,I %ALL RECOV] ALL MY 5]GY1 :5 ,I AM CONV9C$ ?AT MY EX]TIONS WILL DRAW US MORE CLOSELY TOGE!R4 ,ONE MORE ADIEU6 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #de ,SUNDAY1 ,JUNE #a#d4 ,I RA!R EXPECT$ TO HE> FROM Y\ TO-DAY--,I WI% Y\ W\LD NOT FAIL TO WRITE TO ME = A LITTLE TIME1 BECAUSE ,I AM NOT QUITE WELL--,:E!R ,I HAVE ANY GOOD SLEEP OR NOT1 ,I WAKE 9 ! MORN+ 9 VIOL5T FITS ( TREMBL+--&1 9 SPITE ( ALL MY EF=TS1 ! *ILD--EV]Y ?+--FATIGUES ME1 9 :I* ,I SEEK = SOLACE OR AMUSEM5T4 ,MR4 ---- =C$ ON ME A LETT] TO A PHYSICIAN ( ?IS PLACE2 IT WAS =TUNATE1 = ,I %\LD O!RWISE HAVE HAD SOME DIFFICULTY TO OBTA9 ! NECESS>Y 9=MATION4 ,HIS WIFE IS A PRETTY WOMAN 7,I CAN ADMIRE1 Y\ KN[1 A PRETTY WOMAN1 :5 ,I AM ALONE7 & HE AN 9TELLIG5T & RA!R 9T]E/+ MAN4--,!Y HAVE BEHAV$ TO ME ) GREAT HOSPITALITY2 & POOR ------ WAS NEV] SO HAPPY 9 H] LIFE1 AS AMONG !IR Y\NG BROOD4 ,!Y TOOK ME 9 !IR C>RIAGE TO ------1 & ,I RAN OV] MY FAVORITE WALKS1 ) A VIVACITY ?AT W\LD HAVE A/ONI%$ Y\4--,! T[N DID NOT PLEASE ME QUITE SO WELL AS =M]LY--,IT APPE>$ SO DIM9UTIVE2 &1 :5 ,I F\ND ?AT MANY ( ! 9HABITANTS HAD LIV$ 9 ! SAME H\SES EV] S9CE ,I LEFT IT1 ,I C\LD NOT HELP WOND]+ H[ !Y C\LD ?US HAVE VEGETAT$1 :IL/ ,I WAS RUNN+ OV] A WORLD ( SORR[1 SNAT*+ AT PLEASURE1 & ?R[+ (F PREJUDICES4 ,! PLACE :]E ,I AT PRES5T AM1 IS MU* IMPROV$2 BUT IT IS A/ONI%+ :AT /RIDES >I/OCRACY & FANATICISM HAVE MADE1 S9CE ,I RESID$ 9 ?IS C\NTRY4 ,! W9D DOES NOT APPE> 9CL9$ TO *ANGE1 SO ,I AM /ILL =C$ TO L+]--,:5 DO Y\ ?9K ?AT Y\ %ALL BE ABLE TO SET \T = ,FRANCE8 ,I DO NOT 5TIRELY LIKE ! ASPECT ( Y\R AFFAIRS1 & /ILL LESS Y\R CONNECTIONS ON EI!R SIDE ( ! WAT]4 ,(T5 DO ,I SI<1 :5 ,I ?9K ( Y\R 5TANGLEM5TS 9 BUS9ESS1 & Y\R EXTREME RE/LESSNESS ( M9D4--,EV5 N[ ,I AM ALMO/ AFRAID TO ASK Y\1 :E!R ! PLEASURE ( BE+ FREE1 DOES NOT OV]-BALANCE ! PA9 Y\ FELT AT P>T+ ) ME8 ,SOMETIMES ,I 9DULGE ! HOPE ?AT Y\ WILL FEEL ME NECESS>Y TO Y\--OR :Y %\LD WE MEET AGA98--BUT1 ! MOM5T AFT]1 DESPAIR DAMPS MY RIS+ SPIRITS1 AGGRAVAT$ BY ! EMOTIONS ( T5D]NESS1 :I* \ES ( LIFE4----,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY & AFFECTIONATELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #df ,JUNE #a#e4 ,I WANT TO KN[ H[ Y\ HAVE SETTL$ ) RESPECT TO ------4 ,9 %ORT1 BE V]Y P>TICUL> 9 Y\R ACC\NT ( ALL Y\R AFFAIRS--LET \R CONFID5CE1 MY DE>1 BE UNB\ND$4--,! LA/ TIME WE W]E SEP>AT$1 WAS A SEP>ATION 9DE$ ON Y\R P>T--,N[ Y\ HAVE ACT$ MORE +5U\SLY1 LET ! MO/ AFFECTIONATE 9T]*ANGE ( S5TIM5TS FILL UP ! A*+ VOID ( DISAPPO9TM5T4 ,I ALMO/ DREAD ?AT Y\R PLANS WILL PROVE ABORTIVE--YET %\LD ! MO/ UNLUCKY TURN S5D Y\ HOME TO US1 CONV9C$ ?AT A TRUE FRI5D IS A TREASURE1 ,I %\LD NOT MU* M9D HAV+ TO /RUGGLE ) ! WORLD AGA94 ,ACCUSE ME NOT ( PRIDE--YET SOMETIMES1 :5 NATURE HAS OP5$ MY HE>T TO ITS AU?OR1 ,I HAVE WOND]$ ?AT Y\ DID NOT SET A HI<] VALUE ON MY HE>T4 ,RECEIVE A KISS FROM ------1 ,I WAS GO+ TO ADD1 IF Y\ WILL NOT TAKE ONE FROM ME1 & BELIEVE ME Y\RS ,S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,! W9D /ILL CONT9UES 9 ! SAME QU>T]4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dg ,TUESDAY ,MORN+4 ,! CAPTA9 HAS JU/ S5T TO 9=M ME1 ?AT ,I MU/ BE ON BO>D 9 ! C\RSE ( A FEW H\RS4--,I WI%$ TO HAVE /AY$ TILL TO-MORR[4 ,IT W\LD HAVE BE5 A COM=T TO ME TO HAVE RECEIV$ ANO!R LETT] FROM Y\--,%\LD ONE >RIVE1 IT WILL BE S5T AFT] ME4 ,MY SPIRITS >E AGITAT$1 ,I SC>CELY KN[ :Y----,! QUITT+ ,5GL& SEEMS TO BE A FRE% P>T+4--,SURELY Y\ WILL NOT =GET ME4--,A ?\S& WEAK =EBOD+S ASSAULT MY S\L1 & ! /ATE ( MY HEAL? R5D]S ME S5SIBLE TO EV]Y ?+4 ,IT IS SURPRIS+ ?AT 9 ,LONDON1 9 A CONT9UAL CONFLICT ( M9D1 ,I WAS /ILL GR[+ BETT]--:IL/ H]E1 B[$ D[N BY ! DESPOTIC H& ( FATE1 =C$ 9TO RESIGNATION BY DESPAIR1 ,I SEEM TO BE FAD+ AWAY--P]I%+ B5EA? A CRUEL BLIT ?AT HAS BE5 AS IT W]E A M>K = MIS]Y1 ,I DREAD TO MEET WRET*$NESS 9 SOME NEW %APE4--,WELL1 LET IT COME--,I C>E NOT6--:AT HAVE ,I TO DREAD1 :O HAVE SO LITTLE TO HOPE =6 ,GOD BLESS Y\--,I AM MO/ AFFECTIONATELY & S9C]ELY Y\RS "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #dh ,W$NESDAY ,MORN+4 ,I WAS HURRI$ ON BO>D YE/]DAY AB\T ?REE O'CLOCK1 ! W9D HAV+ *ANG$4 ,BUT BE=E EV5+ IT VE]$ R\ND TO ! OLD PO9T2 & H]E WE >E1 9 ! MID/ ( MI/S & WAT]1 ONLY TAK+ ADVANTAGE ( ! TIDE TO ADVANCE A FEW MILES4 ,Y\ WILL SC>CELY SUPPOSE ?AT ,I LEFT ! T[N ) RELUCTANCE--YET IT WAS EV5 SO--= ,I WI%$ TO RECEIVE ANO!R LETT] FROM Y\1 & ,I FELT PA9 AT P>T+1 = EV] P]HAPS1 FROM ! AMIABLE FAMILY1 :O HAD TREAT$ ME ) SO MU* HOSPITALITY & K9DNESS4 ,!Y WILL PROBABLY S5D ME Y\R LETT]1 IF IT >RIVES ?IS MORN+2 = H]E WE >E LIKELY TO REMA91 ,I AM AFRAID TO ?9K H[ LONG4 ,! VESSEL IS V]Y COMMODI\S1 & ! CAPTA9 A CIVIL1 OP5-HE>T$ K9D ( MAN4 ,!RE BE+ NO O!R PASS5G]S1 ,I HAVE ! CAB9 TO MYSELF1 :I* IS PLEASANT2 & ,I HAVE BR\9ESS2 BUT ,I SEEM 9CL9$1 RA!R TO EMPLOY ! DEAD MOM5TS ( SUSP5CE 9 WRIT+ SOME EFFUSIONS1 ?AN 9 READ+4 ,:AT >E Y\ AB\T8 ,H[ >E Y\R AFFAIRS GO+ ON8 ,IT MAY BE A LONG TIME BE=E Y\ ANSW] !SE QUE/IONS4 ,MY DE> FRI5D1 MY HE>T S9KS )9 ME6--,:Y AM ,I =C$ ?US TO /RUGGLE CONT9UALLY ) MY AFFECTIONS & FEEL+S8--,AH6 :Y >E ?OSE AFFECTIONS & FEEL+S ! S\RCE ( SO MU* MIS]Y1 :5 !Y SEEM TO HAVE BE5 GIV5 TO VIVIFY MY HE>T1 & EXT5D MY USEFULNESS6 ,BUT ,I MU/ NOT DWELL ON ?IS SUBJECT4--,WILL Y\ NOT 5DEAVOR TO *]I% ALL ! AFFECTION Y\ CAN = ME8 ,:AT AM ,I SAY+8--,RA!R =GET ME1 IF Y\ CAN--IF O!R GRATIFICATIONS >E DE>] TO Y\4--,H[ IS EV]Y REMEMBRANCE ( M9E EMBITT]$ BY DISAPPO9TM5T8 ,:AT A WORLD IS ?IS6--,!Y ONLY SEEM HAPPY1 :O NEV] LOOK BEYOND S5SUAL OR >TIFICIAL 5JOYM5TS4--,ADIEU6 ------ BEG9S TO PLAY ) ! CAB9-BOY1 & IS AS GAY AS A L>K4--,I WILL LABOR TO BE TRANQUIL2 & AM 9 EV]Y MOOD1 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #di ,?URSDAY4 ,H]E ,I AM /ILL--& ,I HAVE JU/ RECEIV$ Y\R LETT] ( ,MONDAY BY ! PILOT1 :O PROMIS$ TO BR+ IT TO ME1 IF WE W]E DETA9$1 AS HE EXPECT$1 BY ! W9D4--,IT IS 9DE$ WE>ISOME TO BE ?US TOSS$ AB\T )\T GO+ =W>D4--,I HAVE A VIOL5T HEAD-A*E--YET ,I AM OBLIG$ TO TAKE C>E ( ! *ILD1 :O IS A LITTLE TORM5T$ BY H] TEE?1 BECAUSE ------ IS UNABLE TO DO ANY ?+1 %E IS R5D]$ SO SICK BY ! MOTION ( ! %IP1 AS WE RIDE AT AN*OR4 ,!SE >E H[EV] TRIFL+ 9CONV5I5CES1 COMP>$ ) ANGUI% ( M9D--COMP>$ ) ! S9K+ ( A BROK5 HE>T4--,TO TELL Y\ ! TRU?1 ,I NEV] SUFF]$ 9 MY LIFE SO MU* FROM DEPRESSION ( SPIRITS--FROM DESPAIR4--,I DO NOT SLEEP--OR1 IF ,I CLOSE MY EYES1 IT IS TO HAVE ! MO/ T]RIFY+ DREAMS1 9 :I* ,I (T5 MEET Y\ ) DIFF]5T CA/S ( C\NT5ANCE4 ,I WILL NOT1 MY DE> ------1 TORM5T Y\ BY DWELL+ ON MY SUFF]+S--& WILL USE ALL MY EF=TS TO CALM MY M9D1 9/EAD ( DEAD5+ IT--AT PRES5T IT IS MO/ PA9FULLY ACTIVE4 ,I F9D ,I AM NOT EQUAL TO !SE CONT9UAL /RUGGLES--YET Y\R LETT] ?IS MORN+ HAS AF=D$ ME SOME COM=T--& ,I WILL TRY TO REVIVE HOPE4 ,ONE ?+ LET ME TELL Y\--:5 WE MEET AGA9--SURELY WE >E TO MEET6--IT MU/ BE TO P>T NO MORE4 ,I MEAN NOT TO HAVE SEAS BETWE5 US--IT IS MORE ?AN ,I CAN SUPPORT4 ,! PILOT IS HURRY+ ME--,GOD BLESS Y\4 ,9 SPITE ( ! COMMODI\SNESS ( ! VESSEL1 EV]Y ?+ H]E W\LD DISGU/ MY S5SES1 HAD ,I NO?+ ELSE TO ?9K (--0,:5 ! M9D'S FREE1 ! BODY'S DELICATE20--M9E HAS BE5 TOO MU* HURT TO REG>D TRIFLES4 ,Y\RS MO/ TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #e ,SATURDAY4 ,?IS IS ! FIF? DRE>Y DAY ,I HAVE BE5 IMPRISON$ BY ! W9D1 ) EV]Y \TW>D OBJECT TO DISGU/ ! S5SES1 & UNABLE TO BANI% ! REMEMBRANCES ?AT SADD5 MY HE>T4 ,H[ AM ,I ALT]$ BY DISAPPO9TM5T6--,:5 GO+ TO ----1 T5 YE>S AGO1 ! ELA/ICITY ( MY M9D WAS SUFFICI5T TO W>D (F WE>9ESS--& ! IMAG9ATION /ILL C\LD DIP H] BRU% 9 ! RA9B[ ( FANCY1 & SKET* FUTURITY 9 SMIL+ COLORS4 ,N[ ,I AM GO+ T[>DS ! ,NOR? 9 SE>* ( SUNBEAMS6--,WILL ANY EV] W>M ?IS DESOLAT$ HE>T8 ,ALL NATURE SEEMS TO FR[N--OR RA!R M\RN ) ME4--,EV]Y ?+ IS COLD--COLD AS MY EXPECTATIONS6 ,BE=E ,I LEFT ! %ORE1 TORM5T$1 AS ,I N[ AM1 BY !SE ,NOR? EA/ *ILL]S1 ,I C\LD NOT HELP EXCLAIM+--,GIVE ME1 GRACI\S ,HEAV56 AT LEA/1 G5IAL WEA!R1 IF ,I AM NEV] TO MEET ! G5IAL AFFECTION ?AT /ILL W>MS ?IS AGITAT$ BOSOM--COMPELL+ LIFE TO L+] !RE4 ,I AM N[ GO+ ON %ORE ) ! CAPTA91 ?\< ! WEA!R BE R\<1 TO SEEK = MILK1 @&C4 AT A LITTLE VILLAGE1 & TO TAKE A WALK--AFT] :I* ,I HOPE TO SLEEP--=1 CONF9$ H]E1 SURR\ND$ BY DISAGREEABLE SMELLS1 ,I HAVE LO/ ! LITTLE APPETITE ,I HAD2 & ,I LIE AWAKE1 TILL ?9K+ ALMO/ DRIVES ME TO ! BR9K ( MADNESS--ONLY TO ! BR9K1 = ,I NEV] =GET1 EV5 9 ! FEV]I% SLUMB]S ,I SOMETIMES FALL 9TO1 ! MIS]Y ,I AM LABOR+ TO BLUNT ! ! S5SE (1 BY EV]Y EX]TION 9 MY P[]4 ,POOR ------ /ILL CONT9UES SICK1 & ------ GR[S WE>Y :5 ! WEA!R WILL NOT ALL[ H] TO REMA9 ON DECK4 ,I HOPE ?IS WILL BE ! LA/ LETT] ,I %ALL WRITE FROM ,5GL& TO Y\-->E Y\ NOT TIR$ ( ?IS L+]+ ADIEU8 ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ea ,SUNDAY ,MORN+4 ,! CAPTA9 LA/ NID AGA91 = ! W9D HAS *ANG$4 ,I HALF EXPECT$ TO F9D A LETT] FROM Y\ H]E4 ,HAD Y\ WRITT5 ONE HAPHAZ>D1 IT W\LD HAVE BE5 K9D & CONSID]ATE--Y\ MIT4 ,!SE >E ATT5TIONS1 MORE GRATEFUL TO ! HE>T ?AN (F]S ( S]VICE--,BUT :Y DO ,I FOOLI%LY CONT9UE TO LOOK = !M8 ,ADIEU6 ADIEU6 ,MY FRI5D--Y\R FRI5D%IP IS V]Y COLD--Y\ SEE ,I AM HURT4--,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,I MAY P]HAPS BE1 SOME TIME OR O!R1 9DEP5D5T 9 EV]Y S5SE ( ! WORD--,AH6 !RE IS BUT ONE S5SE ( IT ( CONSEQU5CE4 ,I WILL BREAK OR B5D ?IS WEAK HE>T--YET EV5 N[ IT IS FULL4 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,! *ILD IS WELL2 ,I DID NOT LEAVE H] ON BO>D4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #eb ,JUNE #b#g1 ,SATURDAY4 ,I >RIV$ 9 ------ ?IS AFT]NOON1 AFT] VA9LY ATTEMPT+ TO L& AT ----4 ,I HAVE N[ BUT A MOM5T1 BE=E ! PO/ GOES \T1 TO 9=M Y\ WE HAVE GOT H]E2 ?\< NOT )\T CONSID]ABLE DIFFICULTY1 = WE W]E SET A%ORE 9 A BOAT ABOVE TW5TY MILES BEL[4 ,:AT ,I SUFF]$ 9 ! VESSEL ,I WILL NOT N[ DESCANT UPON--NOR M5TION ! PLEASURE ,I RECEIV$ FROM ! SIRIAGE ?AT WAS TO TRANSPORT US TO ?IS PLACE1 ,I FELL1 )\T ANY PREVI\S W>N+1 S5SELESS ON ! ROCKS--& H[ ,I ESCAP$ ) LIFE ,I CAN SC>CELY GUESS4 ,I WAS 9 A /UP\R = A QU>T] ( AN H\R2 ! SUFFUSION ( BLOOD AT LA/ RE/OR$ ME TO MY S5SES--! CONTUSION IS GREAT1 & MY BRA9 CONFUS$4 ,! *ILD IS WELL4 ,TW5TY MILES RIDE 9 ! RA91 AFT] MY ACCID5T1 HAS SUFFICI5TLY D]ANG$ ME--& H]E ,I C\LD NOT GET A FIRE TO W>M ME1 OR ANY ?+ W>M TO EAT2 ! 9NS >E M]E /ABLES--,I MU/ NEV]!LESS GO TO B$4 ,= ,GOD'S SAKE1 LET ME HE> FROM Y\ IMM$IATELY1 MY FRI5D6 ,I AM NOT WELL & YET Y\ SEE ,I CANNOT DIE4 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ec ,JUNE #b#i4 ,I WROTE TO Y\ BY ! LA/ PO/1 TO 9=M Y\ ( MY >RIVAL2 & ,I BELIEVE ,I ALLUD$ TO ! EXTREME FATIGUE ,I 5DUR$ ON %IP-BO>D1 [+ TO ------'S ILLNESS1 & ! R\Y TO GO TO ------4 ,! 9NS H]E >E SO BAD1 ,I WAS =C$ TO ACCEPT ( AN AP>TM5T 9 HIS H\SE4 ,I AM OV]:ELM$ ) CIVILITIES ON ALL SIDES1 & FATIGU$ ) ! 5DEAVORS TO AMUSE ME1 FROM :I* ,I CANNOT ESCAPE4 ,MY FRI5D--MY FRI5D1 ,I AM NOT WELL--A DEADLY WEIT4 ,I AM AGA9 TOSS$ ON ! TR\BL$ BILL[S ( LIFE2 & OBLIG$ TO COPE ) DIFFICULTIES1 )\T BE+ BUOY$ UP BY ! HOPES ?AT ALONE R5D] !M BE>ABLE4 0,H[ FLAT1 DULL1 & UNPR(ITABLE10 APPE>S TO ME ALL ! BU/LE 9TO :I* ,I SEE PEOPLE H]E SO EAG]LY 5T]6 ,I LONG EV]Y NIT = EV]1 ,I CANNOT BE> !SE CONT9UAL /RUGGLES--,BUT ,I WI% Y\ TO EXAM9E C>EFULLY Y\R [N HE>T & M9D2 &1 IF Y\ P]CEIVE ! LEA/ *ANCE ( BE+ HAPPI] )\T ME ?AN ) ME1 OR IF Y\R 9CL9ATION LEANS CAPRICI\SLY TO ?AT SIDE1 DO NOT DISSEMBLE2 BUT TELL ME FRANKLY ?AT Y\ WILL NEV] SEE ME MORE4 ,I WILL !N ADOPT ! PLAN ,I M5TION$ TO Y\--= WE MU/ EI!R LIVE TOGE!R1 OR ,I WILL BE 5TIRELY 9DEP5D5T4 ,MY HE>T IS SO OPPRESS$1 ,I CANNOT WRITE ) PRECISION--,Y\ KN[ H[EV] ?AT :AT ,I SO IMP]FECTLY EXPRESS1 >E NOT ! CRUDE S5TIM5TS ( ! MOM5T--,Y\ CAN ONLY CONTRIBUTE TO MY COM=T 7IT IS ! CONSOLATION ,I AM 9 NE$ (7 BY BE+ ) ME--&1 IF ! T5D]E/ FRI5D%IP IS ( ANY VALUE1 :Y WILL Y\ NOT LOOK TO ME = A DEGREE ( SATISFACTION ?AT HE>TLESS AFFECTIONS CANNOT BE/[8 ,TELL ME !N1 WILL Y\ DET]M9E TO MEET ME AT ,BASLE8--,I %ALL1 ,I %\LD IMAG9E1 BE AT ------ BE=E ! CLOSE ( ,AUGU/2 &1 AFT] Y\ SETTLE Y\R AFFAIRS AT ,P>IS1 C\LD WE NOT MEET !RE8 ,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,POOR ------ HAS SUFF]$ DUR+ ! J\RNEY ) H] TEE?4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ee ,JULY #c4 ,!RE WAS A GLOOM9ESS DIFFUS$ ?R\< Y\R LA/ LETT]1 ! IMPRESSION ( :I* /ILL RE/S ON MY M9D--?\<1 RECOLLECT+ H[ QUICKLY Y\ ?R[ (F ! =CIBLE FEEL+S ( ! MOM5T1 ,I FLATT] MYSELF IT HAS LONG S9CE GIV5 PLACE TO Y\R USUAL *E]FULNESS4 ,BELIEVE ME 7& MY EYES FILL ) TE>S ( T5D]NESS AS ,I ASSURE Y\7 !RE IS NO?+ ,I W\LD NOT 5DURE 9 ! WAY ( PRIVATION1 RA!R ?AN DI/URB Y\R TRANQUILITY4--,IF ,I AM FAT$ TO BE UNHAPPY1 ,I WILL LABOR TO HIDE MY SORR[S 9 MY [N BOSOM2 & Y\ %ALL ALWAYS F9D ME A FAI?FUL1 AFFECTIONATE FRI5D4 ,I GR[ MORE & MORE ATTA*$ TO MY LITTLE GIRL--& ,I *]I% ?IS AFFECTION )\T FE>1 BECAUSE IT MU/ BE A LONG TIME BE=E IT CAN BECOME BITT]NESS ( S\L4--,%E IS AN 9T]E/+ CREATURE4--,ON %IP-BO>D1 H[ (T5 AS ,I GAZ$ AT ! SEA1 HAVE ,I LONG$ TO BURY MY TR\BL$ BOSOM 9 ! LESS TR\BL$ DEEP2 ASS]T+ ) ,BRUTUS1 0?AT ! VIRTUE ,I HAD FOLL[$ TOO F>1 WAS M]ELY AN EMPTY NAME60 & NO?+ BUT ! SIT--C\LD HAVE /OPP$ ME4 ,:AT PECULI> MIS]Y HAS FALL5 TO MY %>E6 ,TO ACT UP TO MY PR9CIPLES1 ,I HAVE LAID ! /RICTE/ RE/RA9T ON MY V]Y ?\T$ ) AFFRI ! FRAGRANCE ( REVIV+ NATURE4 ,MY FRI5D1 ,I HAVE DE>LY PAID = ONE CONVICTION4--,LOVE1 9 SOME M9DS1 IS AN AFFAIR ( S5TIM5T1 >IS+ FROM ! SAME DELICACY ( P]CEPTION 7OR TA/E7 AS R5D]S !M ALIVE TO ! BEAUTIES ( NATURE1 POETRY1 @&C41 ALIVE TO ! *>MS ( ?OSE EVANESC5T GRACES ?AT >E1 AS IT W]E1 IMPALPABLE--!Y MU/ BE FELT1 !Y CANNOT BE DESCRIB$4 ,LOVE IS A WANT ( MY HE>T4 ,I HAVE EXAM9$ MYSELF LATELY ) MORE C>E ?AN =M]LY1 & F9D1 ?AT TO DEAD5 IS NOT TO CALM ! M9D--,AIM+ AT TRANQUILITY1 ,I HAVE ALMO/ DE/ROY$ ALL ! 5]GY ( MY S\L--ALMO/ ROOT$ \T :AT R5D]S IT E/IMABLE--,YES1 ,I HAVE DAMP$ ?AT 5?USIASM ( *>ACT]1 :I* CONV]TS ! GROSSE/ MAT]IALS 9TO A FUEL1 ?AT IMP]CEPTIBLY FE$S HOPES1 :I* ASPIRE ABOVE COMMON 5JOYM5T4 ,DESPAIR1 S9CE ! BIR? ( MY *ILD1 HAS R5D]$ ME /UPID--S\L & BODY SEEM$ TO BE FAD+ AWAY BE=E ! WI!R+ T\* ( DISAPPO9TM5T4 ,I AM N[ 5DEAVOR+ TO RECOV] MYSELF--& SU* IS ! ELA/ICITY ( MY CON/ITUTION1 & ! PURITY ( ! ATMOSPH]E H]E1 ?AT HEAL? UNS\E ! SURE H>B+]S ( ! DELIK4 ,/ILL1 :5 WE MEET AGA91 ,I WILL NOT TORM5T Y\1 ,I PROMISE Y\4 ,I BLU% :5 ,I RECOLLECT MY =M] CONDUCT--& WILL NOT 9 FUTURE CONF\ND MYSELF ) ! BE+S :OM ,I FEEL TO BE MY 9F]IORS4--,I WILL LI/5 TO DELICACY1 OR PRIDE4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ef ,JULY #d4 ,I HOPE TO HE> FROM Y\ BY TO-MORR['S MAIL4 ,MY DE>E/ FRI5D6 ,I CANNOT TE> MY AFFECTIONS FROM Y\--&1 ?\< EV]Y REMEMBRANCE /+S ME TO ! S\L1 ,I ?9K ( Y\1 TILL ,I MAKE ALL[ANCE = ! V]Y DEFECTS ( *>ACT]1 ?AT HAVE GIV5 SU* A CRUEL /AB TO MY PEACE4 ,/ILL H[EV] ,I AM MORE ALIVE1 ?AN Y\ HAVE SE5 ME = A LONG1 LONG TIME4 ,I HAVE A DEGREE ( VIVACITY1 EV5 9 MY GRIEF1 :I* IS PREF]ABLE TO ! B5UMB+ /UP\R ?AT1 = ! LA/ YE>1 HAS FROZ5 UP ALL MY FACULTIES4--,P]HAPS ?IS *ANGE IS MORE [+ TO RETURN+ HEAL?1 ?AN TO ! VIGOR ( MY REASON--=1 9 SPITE ( SADNESS 7& SURELY ,I HAVE HAD MY %>E71 ! PURITY ( ?IS AIR1 & ! BE+ CONT9UALLY \T 9 IT1 = ,I SLEEP 9 ! C\NTRY EV]Y NIANCE ?AT REALLY SURPRISES ME4--,! ROSY F+]S ( HEAL? ALREADY /REAK MY *EEKS--& ,I HAVE SE5 A PHYSICAL LIFE 9 MY EYES1 AFT] ,I HAVE BE5 CLIMB+ ! ROCKS1 ?AT RESEMBL$ ! FOND1 CR$UL\S HOPES ( Y\?4 ,) :AT A CRUEL SI< HAVE ,I RECOLLECT$ ?AT ,I HAD =GOTT5 TO HOPE6--,REASON1 OR RA!R EXP]I5CE1 DOES NOT ?US CRUELLY DAMP POOR ------'S PLEASURES2 %E PLAYS ALL DAY 9 ! G>D5 ) ------'S *ILDR51 & MAKES FRI5DS = H]SELF4 ,DO NOT TELL ME1 ?AT Y\ >E HAPPI] )\T US--,WILL Y\ NOT COME TO US 9 ,SWITZ]L&8 ,AH1 :Y DO NOT Y\ LOVE US ) MORE S5TIM5T8--:Y >E Y\ A CREATURE ( SU* SYMPA?Y1 ?AT ! W>M? ( Y\R FEEL+S1 OR RA!R QUICKNESS ( Y\R S5SES1 H>D5S Y\R HE>T8 ,IT IS MY MIS=TUNE1 ?AT MY IMAG9ATION IS P]PETUALLY %AD+ Y\R DEFECTS1 & L5D+ Y\ *>MS1 :IL/ ! GROSSNESS ( Y\R S5SES MAKES Y\ 7CALL ME NOT VA97 OV]LOOK GRACES 9 ME1 ?AT ONLY DIGNITY ( M9D1 & ! S5SIBILITY ( AN EXP&$ HE>T CAN GIVE4--,GOD BLESS Y\6 ,ADIEU4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #eg ,JULY #g4 ,I C\LD NOT HELP FEEL+ EXTREMELY MORTIFI$ LA/ PO/1 AT NOT RECEIV+ A LETT] FROM Y\4 ,MY BE+ AT ------ WAS BUT A *ANCE1 & Y\ MID$ IT2 & W\LD A YE> AGO4 ,I %ALL NOT H[EV] COMPLA9--,!RE >E MIS=TUNES SO GREAT1 AS TO SIL5CE ! USUAL EXPRESSIONS ( SORR[--,BELIEVE ME1 !RE IS SU* A ?+ AS A BROK5 HE>T6 ,!RE >E *>ACT]S :OSE V]Y 5]GY PREYS UPON !M2 & :O1 EV] 9CL9$ TO *]I% BY REFLECTION SOME PASSION1 CANNOT RE/ SATISFI$ ) ! COMMON COM=TS ( LIFE4 ,I HAVE 5DEAVOR$ TO FLY FROM MYSELF1 & LAUN*$ 9TO ALL ! DISSIPATION POSSIBLE H]E1 ONLY TO FEEL KE5] ANGUI%1 :5 ALONE ) MY *ILD4 ,/ILL1 C\LD ANY ?+ PLEASE ME--HAD NOT DISAPPO9TM5T CUT ME (F FROM LIFE1 ?IS ROMANTIC C\NTRY1 !SE F9E EV5+S1 W\LD 9T]E/ ME4--,MY ,GOD6 CAN ANY ?+8 & AM ,I EV] TO FEEL ALIVE ONLY TO PA9FUL S5SATIONS8--,BUT IT CANNOT--IT %ALL NOT LA/ LONG4 ,! PO/ IS AGA9 >RIV$2 ,I HAVE S5T TO SEEK = LETT]S1 ONLY TO BE W\ND$ TO ! S\L BY A NEGATIVE4--,MY BRA9 SEEMS ON FIRE1 ,I MU/ GO 9TO ! AIR4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #eh ,JULY #a#d4 ,I AM N[ ON MY J\RNEY TO ------4 ,I FELT MORE AT LEAV+ MY *ILD1 ?AN ,I ?\D ! HALF-=M$ S\NDS ( H] VOICE1--,I ASK$ MYSELF H[ ,I C\LD ?9K ( P>T+ ) H] = EV]1 ( LEAV+ H] ?US HELPLESS8 ,POOR LAMB6 ,IT MAY RUN V]Y WELL 9 A TALE1 ?AT 0,GOD WILL TEMP] ! W9DS TO ! %ORN LAMB60 BUT H[ CAN ,I EXPECT ?AT %E WILL BE %IELD$1 :5 MY NAK$ BOSOM HAS HAD TO BRAVE CONT9UALLY ! PITILESS /ORM8 ,YES2 ,I C\LD ADD1 ) POOR ,LE>--,:AT IS ! W> ( ELEM5TS TO ! PANGS ( DISAPPO9T$ AFFECTION1 & ! HORROR >IS+ FROM A DISCOV]Y ( A BREA* ( CONFID5CE1 ?AT SNAPS EV]Y SOCIAL TIE6 ,ALL IS NOT RIT TO Y\--( ?IS ONLY COM=T Y\ HAVE DEPRIV$ ME1 :IL/ MY HAPP9ESS1 Y\ TELL ME1 WAS Y\R FIR/ OBJECT4 ,/RANGE WANT ( JUDGM5T6 ,I WILL NOT COMPLA92 BUT1 FROM ! S\NDNESS ( Y\R UND]/&+1 ,I AM CONV9C$1 IF Y\ GIVE Y\RSELF LEAVE TO REFLECT1 Y\ WILL ALSO FEEL1 ?AT Y\R CONDUCT TO ME1 SO F> FROM BE+ G5]\S1 HAS NOT BE5 JU/4--,I MEAN NOT TO ALLUDE TO FACTITI\S PR9CIPLES ( MORALITY2 BUT TO ! SIMPLE BASIS ( ALL RECTITUDE4--,H[EV] ,I DID NOT 9T5D TO >GUE--,Y\R NOT WRIT+ IS CRUEL--& MY REASON IS P]HAPS DI/URB$ BY CON/ANT WRET*$NESS4 ,POOR ------ W\LD FA9 HAVE ACCOMPANI$ ME1 \T ( T5D]NESS2 = MY FA9T+1 OR RA!R CONVULSION1 :5 ,I L&$1 & MY SUDD5 *ANGES ( C\NT5ANCE S9CE1 HAVE AL>M$ H] SO MU*1 ?AT %E IS P]PETUALLY AFRAID ( SOME ACCID5T--,BUT IT W\LD HAVE 9JUR$ ! *ILD ?IS W>M SEASON1 AS %E IS CUTT+ H] TEE?4 ,I HE> NOT ( Y\R HAV+ WRITT5 TO ME AT ----4 ,V]Y WELL6 ,ACT AS Y\ PLEASE--!RE IS NO?+ ,I FE> OR C>E =6 ,:5 ,I SEE :E!R ,I CAN1 OR CANNOT OBTA9 ! MONEY ,I AM COME H]E AB\T1 ,I WILL NOT TR\BLE Y\ ) LETT]S TO :I* Y\ DO NOT REPLY4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ei ,JULY #a#h4 ,I AM H]E 9 ----1 SEP>AT$ FROM MY *ILD--& H]E ,I MU/ REMA9 A MON? AT LEA/1 OR ,I MIGE ALL MY OBLIGATIONS ( A PECUNI>Y K9D4--,I AM L[]$ 9 MY [N EYES1 ON ACC\NT ( MY NOT HAV+ DONE IT SOON]4 ,I %ALL MAKE NO FUR!R COMM5TS ON Y\R SIL5CE4 ,GOD BLESS Y\6 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #f ,JULY #c4 ,I HAVE JU/ RECEIV$ TWO ( Y\R LETT]S1 DAT$ ! #b#f? & #c? ( ,JUNE2 & Y\ MU/ HAVE RECEIV$ SEV]AL FROM ME1 9=M+ Y\ ( MY DET5TION1 & H[ MU* ,I WAS HURT BY Y\R SIL5CE4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,WRITE TO ME !N1 MY FRI5D1 & WRITE EXPLICITLY4 ,I HAVE SUFF]$1 ,GOD KN[S1 S9CE ,I LEFT Y\4 ,AH6 Y\ HAVE NEV] FELT ?IS K9D ( SICKNESS ( HE>T6--,MY M9D H[EV] IS AT PRES5T PA9FULLY ACTIVE1 & ! SYMPA?Y ,I FEEL ALMO/ RISES TO AGONY4 ,BUT ?IS IS NOT A SUBJECT ( COMPLA9T1 IT HAS AF=D$ ME PLEASURE1--& REFLECT$ PLEASURE IS ALL ,I HAVE TO HOPE =--IF A SP>K ( HOPE BE YET ALIVE 9 MY =LORN BOSOM4 ,I WILL TRY TO WRITE ) A DEGREE ( COMPOSURE4 ,I WI% = US TO LIVE TOGE!R1 BECAUSE ,I WANT Y\ TO ACQUIRE AN HABITUAL T5D]NESS = MY POOR GIRL4 ,I CANNOT BE> TO ?9K ( LEAV+ H] ALONE 9 ! WORLD1 OR ?AT %E %\LD ONLY BE PROTECT$ BY Y\R S5SE ( DUTY4 ,NEXT TO PRES]V+ H]1 MY MO/ E>NE/ WI% IS NOT TO DI/URB Y\R PEACE4 ,I HAVE NO?+ TO EXPECT1 & LITTLE TO FE>1 9 LIFE--,!RE >E W\NDS ?AT CAN NEV] BE HEAL$--BUT !Y MAY BE ALL[$ TO FE/] 9 SIL5CE )\T W9C+4 ,:5 WE MEET AGA91 Y\ %ALL BE CONV9C$ ?AT ,I HAVE MORE RESOLUTION ?AN Y\ GIVE ME CR$IT =4 ,I WILL NOT TORM5T Y\4 ,IF ,I AM DE/9$ ALWAYS TO BE DISAPPO9T$ & UNHAPPY1 ,I WILL CONCEAL ! ANGUI% ,I CANNOT DISSIPATE2 & ! TIT IS WOR?Y ( ! BLISS ITS FEEL+S ANTICIPATE--& ,I CANNOT EV5 P]SUADE MYSELF1 WRET*$ AS !Y HAVE MADE ME1 ?AT MY PR9CIPLES & S5TIM5TS >E NOT F\ND$ 9 NATURE & TRU?4 ,BUT TO HAVE DONE ) !SE SUBJECTS4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,I HAVE BE5 S]I\SLY EMPLOY$ 9 ?IS WAY S9CE ,I CAME TO ----2 YET ,I NEV] WAS SO MU* 9 ! AIR4--,I WALK1 ,I RIDE ON HORSEBACK--R[1 BA!1 & EV5 SLEEP 9 ! FIELDS2 MY HEAL? IS CONSEQU5TLY IMPROV$4 ,! *ILD1 ------ 9=MS ME1 IS WELL4 ,I LONG TO BE ) H]4 ,WRITE TO ME IMM$IATELY--W]E ,I ONLY TO ?9K ( MYSELF1 ,I C\LD WI% Y\ TO RETURN TO ME1 POOR1 ) ! SIMPLICITY ( *>ACT]1 P>T ( :I* Y\ SEEM LATELY TO HAVE LO/1 ?AT FIR/ ATTA*$ TO Y\4 ,Y\RS MO/ AFFECTIONATELY "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 "9 ,I HAVE BE5 SUBSCRIB+ O!R LETT]S--SO ,I ME*ANICALLY DID ! SAME TO Y\RS4 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fa ,AUGU/ #e4 ,EMPLOYM5T & EX]CISE HAVE BE5 ( GREAT S]VICE TO ME2 & ,I HAVE 5TIRELY RECOV]$ ! /R5G? & ACTIVITY ,I LO/ DUR+ ! TIME ( MY NURS+4 ,I HAVE SELDOM BE5 9 BETT] HEAL?2 & MY M9D1 ?\< TREMBL+ TO ! T\* ( ANGUI%1 IS CALM]--YET /ILL ! SAME4--,I HAVE1 IT IS TRUE1 5JOY$ SOME TRANQUILITY1 & MORE HAPP9ESS H]E1 ?AN = A LONG--LONG TIME PA/4--7,I SAY HAPP9ESS1 = ,I CAN GIVE NO O!R APPELLATION TO ! EXQUISITE DELIT1 ,I F9D ?AT IT IS SO CON/ITUT$1 ,I CANNOT LIVE )\T SOME P>TICUL> AFFECTION--,I AM AFRAID NOT )\T A PASSION--& ,I FEEL ! WANT ( IT MORE 9 SOCIETY1 ?AN 9 SOLITUDE-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,WRIT+ TO Y\1 :5EV] AN AFFECTIONATE EPI!T OCCURS--MY EYES FILL ) TE>S1 & MY TREMBL+ H& /OPS--Y\ MAY !N DEP5D ON MY RESOLUTION1 :5 ) Y\4 ,IF ,I AM DOOM$ TO BE UNHAPPY1 ,I WILL CONF9E MY ANGUI% 9 MY [N BOSOM--T5D]NESS1 RA!R ?AN PASSION1 HAS MADE ME SOMETIMES OV]LOOK DELICACY--! SAME T5D]NESS WILL 9 FUTURE RE/RA9 ME4 ,GOD BLESS Y\6 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fb ,AUGU/ #g4 ,AIR1 EX]CISE1 & BA?+1 HAVE RE/OR$ ME TO HEAL?1 BRAC$ MY MUSCLES1 & COV]$ MY RIBS1 EV5 :IL/ ,I HAVE RECOV]$ MY =M] ACTIVITY4--,I CANNOT TELL Y\ ?AT MY M9D IS CALM1 ?\< ,I HAVE SNAT*$ SOME MOM5TS ( EXQUISITE DELIT = EV]4 ,I AM S5SIBLE ?AT ,I ACT$ FOOLI%LY--BUT ,I WAS WRET*$--:5 WE W]E TOGE!R--,EXPECT+ TOO MU*1 ,I LET ! PLEASURE ,I MIT2 BUT ?AT ( MY *ILD SEEMS TO DEP5D ON \R BE+ TOGE!R4 ,/ILL ,I DO NOT WI% Y\ TO SACRIFICE A *ANCE ( 5JOYM5T = AN UNC]TA9 GOOD4 ,I FEEL A CONVICTION1 ?AT ,I CAN PROVIDE = H]1 & IT %ALL BE MY OBJECT--IF WE >E 9DE$ TO P>T TO MEET NO MORE4 ,H] AFFECTION MU/ NOT BE DIVID$4 ,%E MU/ BE A COM=T TO ME--IF ,I AM TO HAVE NO O!R--& ONLY KN[ ME AS H] SUPPORT4--,I FEEL ?AT ,I CANNOT 5DURE ! ANGUI% ( CORRESPOND+ ) Y\--IF WE >E ONLY TO CORRESPOND4--,NO2 IF Y\ SEEK = HAPP9ESS ELSE:]E1 MY LETT]S %ALL NOT 9T]RUPT Y\R REPOSE4 ,I WILL BE DEAD TO Y\4 ,I CANNOT EXPRESS TO Y\ :AT PA9 IT GIVES ME TO WRITE AB\T AN ET]NAL SEP>ATION4--,Y\ MU/ DET]M9E--EXAM9E Y\RSELF--,BUT1 = ,GOD'S SAKE6 SP>E ME ! ANXIETY ( UNC]TA9TY6--,I MAY S9K UND] ! TRIAL2 BUT ,I WILL NOT COMPLA94 ,ADIEU6 ,IF ,I HAD ANY ?+ MORE TO SAY TO Y\1 IT IS ALL FL[N1 & ABSORB$ BY ! MO/ TORM5T+ APPREH5SIONS1 YET ,I SC>CELY KN[ :AT NEW =M ( MIS]Y ,I HAVE TO DREAD4 ,I \DON = HAV+ SOMETIMES WRITT5 PEEVI%LY2 BUT Y\ WILL IMPUTE IT TO AFFECTION1 IF Y\ UND]/& ANY ?+ ( ! HE>T ( ,Y\RS TRULY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fc ,AUGU/ #i4 ,FIVE ( Y\R LETT]S HAVE BE5 S5T AFT] ME FROM ----4 ,ONE1 DAT$ ! #a#d? ( ,JULY1 WAS WRITT5 9 A /YLE :I* ,I MAY HAVE M]IT$1 BUT DID NOT EXPECT FROM Y\4 ,H[EV] ?IS IS NOT A TIME TO REPLY TO IT1 EXCEPT TO ASSURE Y\ ?AT Y\ %ALL NOT BE TORM5T$ ) ANY MORE COMPLA9TS4 ,I AM DISGU/$ ) MYSELF = HAV+ SO LONG IMPORTUN$ Y\ ) MY AFFECTION4---- ,MY *ILD IS V]Y WELL4 ,WE %ALL SOON MEET1 TO P>T NO MORE1 ,I HOPE--,I MEAN1 ,I & MY GIRL4--,I %ALL WAIT ) SOME DEGREE ( ANXIETY TILL ,I AM 9=M$ H[ Y\R AFFAIRS T]M9ATE4 ,Y\RS S9C]ELY "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fd ,AUGU/ #b#f4 ,I >RIV$ H]E LA/ NIT4 ,WE %ALL P>T NO MORE4 ,Y\ P]HAPS CANNOT CONCEIVE ! PLEASURE IT GAVE ME1 TO SEE H] RUN AB\T1 & PLAY ALONE4 ,H] 9CREAS+ 9TELLIG5CE ATTA*ES ME MORE & MORE TO H]4 ,I HAVE PROMIS$ H] ?AT ,I WILL FULFILL MY DUTY TO H]2 & NO?+ 9 FUTURE %ALL MAKE ME =GET IT4 ,I WILL ALSO EX]T MYSELF TO OBTA9 AN 9DEP5D5CE = H]2 BUT ,I WILL NOT BE TOO ANXI\S ON ?IS HEAD4 ,I HAVE ALREADY TOLD Y\1 ?AT ,I HAVE RECOV]$ MY HEAL?4 ,VIGOR1 & EV5 VIVACITY ( M9D1 HAVE RETURN$ ) A R5OVAT$ CON/ITUTION4 ,AS = PEACE1 WE WILL NOT TALK ( IT4 ,I WAS NOT MADE1 P]HAPS1 TO 5JOY ! CALM CONT5TM5T SO T]M$4-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,Y\ TELL ME ?AT MY LETT]S TORTURE Y\2 ,I WILL NOT DESCRIBE ! EFFECT Y\RS HAVE ON ME4 ,I RECEIV$ ?REE ?IS MORN+1 ! LA/ DAT$ ! #g? ( ?IS MON?4 ,I MEAN NOT TO GIVE V5T TO ! EMOTIONS !Y PRODUC$4--,C]TA9LY Y\ >E RIE NOT CONG5IAL4 ,I HAVE LIV$ 9 AN IDEAL WORLD1 & FO/]$ S5TIM5TS ?AT Y\ DO NOT COMPREH5D--OR Y\ W\LD NOT TREAT ME ?US4 ,I AM NOT1 ,I WILL NOT BE1 M]ELY AN OBJECT ( COMPASSION--A CLOG1 H[EV] LIE ( MY *ILD2 Y\ NE$ NOT CONT9UALLY TELL ME ?AT \R =TUNE IS 9SEP>ABLE1 ?AT Y\ WILL TRY TO *]I% T5D]NESS = ME4 ,DO NO VIOL5CE TO Y\RSELF6 ,:5 WE >E SEP>AT$1 \R 9T]E/1 S9CE Y\ GIVE SO MU* WEIY CONSID]ATIONS1 WILL BE 5TIRELY DIVID$4 ,I WANT NOT PROTECTION )\T AFFECTION2 & SUPPORT ,I NE$ NOT1 :IL/ MY FACULTIES >E UNDI/URB$4 ,I HAD A DISLIKE TO LIV+ 9 ,5GL&2 BUT PA9FUL FEEL+S MU/ GIVE WAY TO SUP]IOR CONSID]ATIONS4 ,I MAY NOT BE ABLE TO ACQUIRE ! SUM NECESS>Y TO MA9TA9 MY *ILD & SELF ELSE:]E4 ,IT IS TOO LATE TO GO TO ,SWITZ]L&4 ,I %ALL NOT REMA9 AT ----1 LIV+ EXP5SIVELY4 ,BUT BE NOT AL>M$6 ,I %ALL NOT =CE MYSELF ON Y\ ANY MORE4 ,ADIEU6 ,I AM AGITAT$--MY :OLE FRAME IS CONVULS$--MY LIPS TREMBLE1 AS IF %OOK BY COLD1 ?\< FIRE SEEMS TO BE CIRCULAT+ 9 MY VE9S4 ,GOD BLESS Y\4 "9 "9 "9 "9 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #fe ,SEPTEMB] #f4 ,I RECEIV$ JU/ N[ Y\R LETT] ( ! #b?4 ,I HAD WRITT5 Y\ A LETT] LA/ NIT RELATIVE TO BUS9ESS4 ,I AM NOT SUFFICI5TLY VA9 TO IMAG9E ?AT ,I CAN1 = MORE ?AN A MOM5T1 CL\D Y\R 5JOYM5T ( LIFE--TO PREV5T EV5 ?AT1 Y\ HAD BETT] NEV] HE> FROM ME--& REPOSE ON ! IDEA ?AT ,I AM HAPPY4 ,GRACI\S ,GOD6 ,IT IS IMPOSSIBLE = ME TO /IFLE SOME?+ LIKE RES5TM5T1 :5 ,I RECEIVE FRE% PRO(S ( Y\R 9DIFF]5CE4 ,:AT ,I HAVE SUFF]$ ?IS LA/ YE>1 IS NOT TO BE =GOTT56 ,I HAVE NOT ?AT HAPPY SUB/ITUTE = WISDOM1 9S5SIBILITY--& ! LIVELY SYMPA?IES :I* B9D ME TO MY FELL[-CREATURES1 >E ALL ( A PA9FUL K9D4--,!Y >E ! AGONIES ( A BROK5 HE>T--PLEASURE & ,I HAVE %AK5 H&S4 ,I SEE H]E NO?+ BUT HEAPS ( RU9S1 & ONLY CONV]SE ) PEOPLE IMM]S$ 9 TRADE & S5SUALITY4 ,I AM WE>Y ( TRAVEL+--YET SEEM TO HAVE NO HOME--NO RE/+ PLACE TO LOOK TO4--,I AM /RANGELY CA/ (F4--,H[ (T51 PASS+ ?R\< ! ROCKS1 ,I HAVE ?\T FEEL+LY ALIVE TO ALL ! AFFECTIONS ( MY NATURE--,I HAVE NEV] MET ) ONE1 S(T] ?AN ! /ONE ?AT ,I W\LD FA9 TAKE = MY LA/ PILL[4 ,I ONCE ?\E B\ND TOGE!R BY AFFECTION OR PR9CIPLE--&1 :5 ,I AM CONSCI\S ?AT ,I HAVE FULFILL$ ! DUTIES ( MY /ATION1 ALMO/ TO A =GETFULNESS ( MYSELF1 ,I AM READY TO DEM&1 9 A MURMUR+ TONE1 ( ,HEAV51 0,:Y AM ,I ?US AB&ON$80 ,Y\ SAY N[ -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,I DO NOT UND]/& Y\4 ,IT IS NECESS>Y = Y\ TO WRITE MORE EXPLICITLY--& DET]M9E ON SOME MODE ( CONDUCT4--,I CANNOT 5DURE ?IS SUSP5SE--,DECIDE--,DO Y\ FE> TO /RIKE ANO!R BL[8 ,WE LIVE TOGE!R1 OR ET]NALLY P>T6--,I %ALL NOT WRITE TO Y\ AGA91 TILL ,I RECEIVE AN ANSW] TO ?IS4 ,I MU/ COMPOSE MY TORTUR$ S\L1 BE=E ,I WRITE ON 9DIFF]5T SUBJECTS4 -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- ,I DO NOT KN[ :E!R ,I WRITE 9TELLIGIBLY1 = MY HEAD IS DI/URB$4--,BUT ?IS Y\ \DON--= IT IS ) DIFFICULTY FREQU5TLY ?AT ,I MAKE \T :AT Y\ MEAN TO SAY--,Y\ WRITE1 ,I SUPPOSE1 AT ,MR4 ----'S AFT] D9N]1 :5 Y\R HEAD IS NOT ! CLE>E/--& AS = Y\R HE>T1 IF Y\ HAVE ONE1 ,I SEE NO?+ LIKE ! DICTATES ( AFFECTION1 UNLESS A GLIMPSE :5 Y\ M5TION1 ! *ILD4--,ADIEU6 O ,VOLUME #a1 ,LETT] #ff ,SEPTEMB] #b#e4 ,I HAVE JU/ F9I%$ A LETT]1 TO BE GIV5 9 *>GE TO CAPTA9 ------4 ,9 ?AT ,I COMPLA9$ ( Y\R SIL5CE1 & EXPRESS$ MY SURPRISE ?AT ?REE MAILS %\LD HAVE >RIV$ )\T BR++ A L9E = ME4 ,S9CE ,I CLOS$ IT1 ,I HE> ( ANO!R1 & /ILL NO LETT]4--,I AM LABOR+ TO WRITE CALMLY--?IS SIL5CE IS A REF9EM5T ON CRUELTY4 ,HAD CAPTA9 ------ REMA9$ A FEW DAYS LONG]1 ,I W\LD HAVE RETURN$ ) HIM TO ,5GL&4 ,:AT HAVE ,I TO DO H]E8 ,I HAVE REPEAT$LY WRITT5 TO Y\ FULLY4 ,DO Y\ DO ! SAME--& QUICKLY4 ,DO NOT LEAVE ME 9 SUSP5SE4 ,I HAVE NOT DES]V$ ?IS ( Y\4 ,I CANNOT WRITE1 MY M9D IS SO DI/RESS$4 ,ADIEU6 O ,VOLUME #b1 ,LETT] #fg ,SEPTEMB] #b#g4 ,:5 Y\ RECEIVE ?IS1 ,I %ALL EI!R HAVE L&$1 OR BE HOV]+ ON ! ,BRITI% COA/--Y\R LETT] ( ! #a#h? DECID$ ME4 ,BY :AT CRIT]ION ( PR9CIPLE OR AFFECTION1 Y\ T]M MY QUE/IONS EXTRAORD9>Y & UNNECESS>Y1 ,I CANNOT DET]M9E4--,Y\ DESIRE ME TO DECIDE--,I HAD DECID$4 ,Y\ MU/ HAVE HAD LONG AGO TWO LETT]S ( M9E1 FROM ------1 TO ! SAME PURPORT1 TO CONSID]4--,9 !SE1 ,GOD KN[S6 !RE WAS BUT TOO MU* AFFECTION1 & ! AGONIES ( A DI/RACT$ M9D W]E BUT TOO FAI?FULLY P\RTRAY$6--,:AT MORE !N HAD ,I TO SAY8--,! NEGATIVE WAS TO COME FROM Y\4--,Y\ HAD P]PETUALLY RECURR$ TO Y\R PROMISE ( MEET+ ME 9 ! AUTUMN--,WAS IT EXTRAORD9>Y ?AT ,I %\LD DEM& A YES1 OR NO8--,Y\R LETT] IS WRITT5 ) EXTREME H>%NESS1 COLDNESS ,I AM ACCU/OM$ TO1 9 IT ,I F9D NOT A TRACE ( ! T5D]NESS ( HUMANITY1 MU* LESS ( FRI5D%IP4--,I ONLY SEE A DESIRE TO HEAVE A LOAD (F Y\R %\LD]S4 ,I AM ABOVE DISPUT+ AB\T WORDS4--,IT MATT]S NOT 9 :AT T]MS Y\ DECIDE4 ,! TREM5D\S P[] :O =M$ ?IS HE>T1 MU/ HAVE =ESE5 ?AT1 9 A WORLD 9 :I* SELF-9T]E/1 9 V>I\S %APES1 IS ! PR9CIPAL MOBILE1 ,I HAD LITTLE *ANCE ( ESCAP+ MIS]Y4--,TO ! FIAT ( FATE ,I SUBMIT4--,I AM CONT5T TO BE WRET*$2 BUT ,I WILL NOT BE CONTEMPTIBLE4--,( ME Y\ HAVE NO CAUSE TO COMPLA91 BUT = HAV+ HAD TOO MU* REG>D = Y\--= HAV+ EXPECT$ A DEGREE ( P]MAN5T HAPP9ESS1 :5 Y\ ONLY S\Y GRATIFICATION4 ,I AM /RANGELY DEFICI5T 9 SAGACITY4--,UNIT+ MYSELF TO Y\1 Y\R T5D]NESS SEEM$ TO MAKE ME AM5DS = ALL MY =M] MIS=TUNES4--,ON ?IS T5D]NESS & AFFECTION ) :AT CONFID5CE DID ,I RE/6--BUT ,I LEAN$ ON A SPE>1 ?AT HAS PI]C$ ME TO ! HE>T4--,Y\ HAVE ?R[N (F A FAI?FUL FRI5D1 TO PURSUE ! CAPRICES ( ! MOM5T4--,WE C]TA9LY >E DIFF]5TLY ORGANIZ$2 = EV5 N[1 :5 CONVICTION HAS BE5 /AMP$ ON MY S\L BY SORR[1 ,I CAN SC>CELY BELIEVE IT POSSIBLE4 ,IT DEP5DS AT PRES5T ON Y\1 :E!R Y\ WILL SEE ME OR NOT4--,I %ALL TAKE NO /EP1 TILL ,I SEE OR HE> FROM Y\4 ,PREP>+ MYSELF = ! WOR/--,I HAVE DET]M9$1 IF Y\R NEXT LETT] BE LIKE ! LA/1 TO WRITE TO ,MR4 ------ TO PROCURE ME AN OBSCURE LODG+1 & NOT TO 9=M ANY BODY ( MY >RIVAL4--,!RE ,I WILL 5DEAVOR 9 A FEW MON?S TO OBTA9 ! SUM NECESS>Y TO TAKE ME TO ,FRANCE--FROM Y\ ,I WILL NOT RECEIVE ANY MORE4--,I AM NOT YET SUFFICI5TLY HUMBL$ TO DEP5D ON Y\R B5EFIC5CE4 ,SOME PEOPLE1 :OM MY UNHAPP9ESS HAS 9T]E/$1 ?\< !Y KN[ NOT ! EXT5T ( IT1 WILL ASSI/ ME TO ATTA9 ! OBJECT ,I HAVE 9 VIEW1 ! 9DEP5D5CE ( MY *ILD4 ,%\LD A PEACE TAKE PLACE1 READY MONEY WILL GO A GREAT WAY 9 ,FRANCE--& ,I WILL BORR[ A SUM1 :I* MY 9DU/RY %ALL 5ABLE ME TO PAY AT MY LEISURE1 TO PUR*ASE A SMALL E/ATE = MY GIRL4--,! ASSI/ANCE ,I %ALL F9D NECESS>Y TO COMPLETE H] $UCATION1 ,I CAN GET AT AN EASY RATE AT ,P>IS--,I CAN 9TRODUCE H] TO SU* SOCIETY AS %E WILL LIKE--& ?US1 SECUR+ = H] ALL ! *ANCE = HAPP9ESS1 :I* DEP5DS ON ME1 ,I %ALL DIE 9 PEACE1 P]SUAD$ ?AT ! FELICITY :I* HAS HI!RTO *EAT$ MY EXPECTATION1 WILL NOT ALWAYS ELUDE MY GRASP4 ,NO POOR TEMPE/-TOSS$ M>9] EV] MORE E>NE/LY LONG$ TO >RIVE AT HIS PORT4 "9 "9 "9 "9 ,I %ALL NOT COME UP 9 ! VESSEL ALL ! WAY1 BECAUSE ,I HAVE NO PLACE TO GO TO4 ,CAPTA9 ------ WILL 9=M Y\ :]E ,I AM4 ,IT IS NE$LESS TO ADD1 ?AT ,I AM NOT 9 A /ATE ( M9D TO BE> SUSP5SE--& ?AT ,I WI% TO SEE Y\1 ?\< IT BE = ! LA/ TIME4 O ,VOLUME #b1 ,LETT] #fh ,SUNDAY1 ,OCTOB] #d4 ,I WROTE TO Y\ BY ! PACKET1 TO 9=M Y\1 ?AT Y\R LETT] ( ! #a#h? ( LA/ MON?1 HAD DET]M9$ ME TO SET \T ) CAPTA9 ------2 BUT1 AS WE SAIL$ V]Y QUICK1 ,I TAKE IT = GRANT$1 ?AT Y\ HAVE NOT YET RECEIV$ IT4 ,Y\ SAY1 ,I MU/ DECIDE = MYSELF4--,I HAD DECID$1 ?AT IT WAS MO/ = ! 9T]E/ ( MY LITTLE GIRL1 & = MY [N COM=T1 LITTLE AS ,I EXPECT1 = US TO LIVE TOGE!R2 & ,I EV5 ?\S H5CE1 :5 ! TUMULT ( BUS9ESS WAS OV]1 TO REPOSE 9 ! SOCIETY ( AN AFFECTIONATE FRI5D1 & M>K ! PROGRESS ( \R 9T]E/+ *ILD1 :IL/ 5DEAVOR+ TO BE ( USE 9 ! CIRCLE Y\ AT LA/ RESOLV$ TO RE/ 92 = Y\ CANNOT RUN AB\T = EV]4 ,FROM ! T5\R ( Y\R LA/ LETT] H[EV]1 ,I AM L$ TO IMAG9E1 ?AT Y\ HAVE =M$ SOME NEW ATTA*M5T4--,IF IT BE SO1 LET ME E>NE/LY REQUE/ Y\ TO SEE ME ONCE MORE1 & IMM$IATELY4 ,?IS IS ! ONLY PRO( ,I REQUIRE ( ! FRI5D%IP Y\ PR(ESS = ME4 ,I WILL !N DECIDE1 S9CE Y\ BOGGLE AB\T A M]E =M4 ,I AM LABOR+ TO WRITE ) CALMNESS--BUT ! EXTREME ANGUI% ,I FEEL1 AT L&+ )\T HAV+ ANY FRI5D TO RECEIVE ME1 & EV5 TO BE CONSCI\S ?AT ! FRI5D :OM ,I MO/ WI% TO SEE1 WILL FEEL A DISAGREEABLE S5SATION AT BE+ 9=M$ ( MY >RIVAL1 DOES NOT COME UND] ! DESCRIPTION ( COMMON MIS]Y4 ,EV]Y EMOTION YIELDS TO AN OV]:ELM+ FLOOD ( SORR[--& ! PLAYFULNESS ( MY *ILD DI/RESSES ME4--,ON H] ACC\NT1 ,I WI%$ TO REMA9 A FEW DAYS H]E1 COM=TLESS AS IS MY SITUATION4--,BESIDES1 ,I DID NOT WI% TO SURPRISE Y\4 ,Y\ HAVE TOLD ME1 ?AT Y\ W\LD MAKE ANY SACRIFICE TO PROMOTE MY HAPP9ESS--&1 EV5 9 Y\R LA/ UNK9D LETT]1 Y\ TALK ( ! TIES :I* B9D Y\ TO ME & MY *ILD4--,TELL ME1 ?AT Y\ WI% IT1 & ,I WILL CUT ?IS ,GORDIAN KNOT4 ,I N[ MO/ E>NE/LY 9TREAT Y\ TO WRITE TO ME1 )\T FAIL1 BY ! RETURN ( ! PO/4 ,DIRECT Y\R LETT] TO BE LEFT AT ! PO/-(FICE1 & TELL ME :E!R Y\ WILL COME TO ME H]E1 OR :]E Y\ WILL MEET ME4 ,I CAN RECEIVE Y\R LETT] ON ,W$NESDAY MORN+4 ,DO NOT KEEP ME 9 SUSP5SE4--,I EXPECT NO?+ FROM Y\1 OR ANY HUMAN BE+3 MY DIE IS CA/6--,I HAVE =TITUDE 5\< TO DET]M9E TO DO MY DUTY2 YET ,I CANNOT RAISE MY DEPRESS$ SPIRITS1 OR CALM MY TREMBL+ HE>T4--,?AT BE+ :O MOLD$ IT ?US1 KN[S ?AT ,I AM UNABLE TO TE> UP BY ! ROOTS ! PROP5SITY TO AFFECTION :I* HAS BE5 ! TORM5T ( MY LIFE--BUT LIFE WILL HAVE AN 5D6 ,%\LD Y\ COME H]E 7A FEW MON?S AGO ,I C\LD NOT HAVE D\BT$ IT7 Y\ WILL F9D ME AT ------4 ,IF Y\ PREF] MEET+ ME ON ! ROAD1 TELL ME :]E4 ,Y\RS AFFECTIONATELY "9 "9 "9 "9 ,*RONOLOGY 3 ,NOVEMB] #c1 #agig 3 ,ASSORT$ ,LETT]S -- ,PUBLICATION4 ,JANU>Y #a#f1 #bbb 3 ,ASSORT$ ,LETT]S -- ,ADD$4 FILE G5]AT$ FROM 3 HTTP3_/_/REVOLTLIB4COM_/