,*APT] #cg ,PEOPLE 3 ,AU?OR 3 ,WILLIAM ,GODW9 ,TEXT 3 ,*,A,P,T,] ,X,X,X,V,I,I4 ,9 MY CONF]5CE ) ! BA%AW ,I MAY SEEM TO HAVE SECUR$ MORE ?AN ONE PO9T ( MAT]IAL IMPORTANCE2 YET IT WAS DIFFICULT = ANY MAN TO BE 9 A /ATE LESS CONSOLATORY OR MORE FULL ( DANG] & M5ACE1 ?AN ,I WAS AT ?IS MOM5T4 ,BY MY VIGILANCE & ! P[] :I* ?US ,I HAD ACQUIR$1 ,I PREV5T$ 9DE$ ! 9HABITANTS FROM WANTONLY DE/ROY+ ! MEANS ( !IR [N SUBSI/5CE2 BUT1 ! MORE ,I WAS !IR B5EFACTOR1 ! MORE ,I APPE>$ TO BECOME ODI\S TO !IR ?\D5 HIS HE>T TO BE ! SPECTATOR ( ! DI/RESS ?AT HE CAN1 & ?AT HE CANNOT1 RELIEVE4 ,BUT :ATEV] ,I BEHELD ( ?IS SORT1 ! MAJORITY ( ! BY/&]S OB/9ATELY P]SI/$ TO ASCRIBE TO MY DELIB]ATE MALIGNITY4 ,! MILIT>Y AID ,I F\ND MYSELF NECESSITAT$ TO 9TRODUCE BY NO MEANS T5D$ TO DIS>M ! PREJUDICES ( MY CLI5TS4 ,9 ONE OR TWO 9/ANCES1 BUT NO MORE1 SLIOSE1 & A FEW ( ! RIOT]S FELL A PREY TO !IR [N WICK$NESS & FOLLY4 ,!SE MIS=TUNES W]E CA/ AS REPROA* UPON ME2 & ,I WAS PURSU$ ) CLAMORS & CURSES4 ,I F\ND IT REQUISITE TO OBTA9 A GU>D = MY P]SON4 ,I WAS ABHORR$ BY ?OSE = :OM ALL MY VIGILANCE WAS EX]T$1 & 9SULT$ BY ! M\?S ?AT ,I SUPPLI$ ) ! NECESS>IES ( EXI/5CE4 ,NOR WAS ?IS MY ONLY S\RCE ( AL>M & UNEAS9ESS 9 MY PRES5T SITUATION4 ,I WAS BY NO MEANS A DUPE TO ! O/5TATI\S CIVILITY ( ! BA%AW4 ,I P]FECTLY UND]/OOD HIS 9S9UATION :5 HE 9VIT$ ! FREQU5T REPETITION ( MY VISITS4 ,I KNEW ?AT1 H[EV] DE>LY ,I PUR*AS$ HIS FRI5D%IP & PATRONAGE1 ,I %\LD /ILL HAVE TO PUR*ASE !M AGA9 & AGA94 ,HIS EXTORTIONS UPON ME ADMITT$ ( NO LIMITS1 EXCEPT FROM HIS [N MODE/Y1 OR ! E/IMATE HE MIK1 HE HAD SUFFICI5TLY %[N ME ,I WAS AT ! M]CY ( HIS CAPRICE1 OR ?AT ( HIS MA/]1 = MY LIB]TY1 & EV5 = MY LIFE4 ,YET1 C\LD ,I HAVE RESOLV$ TO QUIT ,HUNG>Y1 & SEEK ! PROTECTION ( SOME MORE REGUL> GOV]NM5T1 :AT B5EFIT %\LD ,I D]IVE FROM A REMOVAL8 ,MY/]Y WAS ! GREAT & UNCONQU]ABLE BANE ( MY SITUATION1 & FROM ! POISON\S 9FLU5CE ( MY/]Y1 ! MO/ REGUL> SY/EM ( GOV]NM5T WAS NOT COMPET5T TO PROTECT ME4 ,IT W\LD BE IDLE TO IMAG9E ?AT1 9 ANY C\NTRY ON E>?1 A /RANG] W\LD BE P]MITT$ TO LAUN* 9TO SU* EXP5SES AS ?OSE 9 :I* ,I WAS 5GAG$1 )\T BECOM+ AN OBJECT ( SUSPICION1 & BE+ MADE LIABLE TO CONT9UAL 9T]RUPTION 9 HIS MEASURES4 ,YET1 UNLESS ALL[$ TO USE ! RES\RCES ,I POSSESS$1 ( :AT ADVANTAGE WAS IT TO BE ! DEPOSITORY ( WEAL? )\T A B\ND8 ,WAS IT TO BE WI%$ = A MAN UND] MY CIRCUM/ANCES1 TO HAVE A FAMILY1 OR TO BE )\T A FAMILY8 ,:5 ,I HAD ONE1 ,I F\ND ! LEGACY ( ! /RANG] ROBB+ ME ( EV]Y COM=T ( ?AT SORT1 ) ! MO/ CALAMIT\S AGGRAVATIONS4 ,:5 ,I WAS /RIPP$ ( WIFE & *ILDR51 ?\< NO MAN C\LD PRIZE ?OSE B5EFITS MORE DE>LY ?AN ,I PRIZ$ !M1 ,I TOOK TO MYSELF ! CONSOLATION1 ?AT AT LEA/ N[ ,I %\LD RISK NO ONE'S HAPP9ESS BUT MY [N2 & ?AT1 = A P]SON EX]CIS+ MY 5D[M5TS1 IT WAS P]HAPS REQUISITE TO BE FREE FROM EV]Y %ACKLE & 9CUMBRANCE4 ,I F\ND H[EV] ! TOPIC FROM :I* ,I HAD CONSOL$ MYSELF1 9 REALITY ! S\RCE ( A NEW MIS=TUNE4 ,I HAD ! WEAL? ( A NOBLEMAN2 BUT ,I WAS DEPRIV$ ( HIS ADV5TITI\S ATTRIBUTES4 ,I HAD NO ILLU/RI\S ANCE/RY TO BOA/2 ,I HAD NEI!R L9EAGE NOR P>5T2 ,I HAD NEI!R WIFE NOR *ILDR51 9 :OM MUTUALLY TO REFLECT & SEE REFLECT$ ! ELEVAT$NESS & G5]OSITY ( MY /ATION4 ,I HAD NOT EV5 ! ORD9>Y ADVANTAGE1 :I* IS )9 ! REA* ( ALMO/ EV]Y MAN1 ( CONNECTIONS & ACQUA9TANCE1 FRI5DS H&$ D[N TO ME AS A BRAN* ( MY PATRIMONIAL 9H]ITANCE1 FRI5DS :OSE VALUE EXP]I5CE 5ABL$ ME TO ASC]TA91 & FRI5DS ) :OM LONG HABITS ( FAMILI>ITY HAD GIV5 BIR? TO RECIPROCAL 5DE>M5T4 ,! BA%AW HAD IMPUT$ TO ME ! DESIGN ( =M+ A P>TY4 ,ALAS6 !SE1 :I* >E ! GREAT MAT]IALS = CEM5T+ P>TY ATTA*M5TS1 W]E TOTALLY D5I$ ME4 ,I HAD NO BONDS ( ALLIANCE BUT ?OSE :I* MONEY AF=D$1 ! CO>SE/1 ! MEANE/1 ! LEA/ FLATT]+1 & ! MO/ BRITTLE ( ?OSE LIGATURES1 ?AT AF=D ! SEMBLANCE ( UNIT+ MAN ) MAN4 ,FROM 3 ,!,AN>*I/,LIBR>Y4ORG4 ,*RONOLOGY 3 ,JANU>Y #e1 #bba 3 ,*APT] #cg -- ,ADD$4 ,JANU>Y #a#g1 #bbb 3 ,*APT] #cg -- ,UPDAT$4 FILE G5]AT$ FROM 3 HTTP3_/_/REVOLTLIB4COM_/