,*APT] #a 
,:AT ,IS A ,BULL%IT ,JOB8 

,PEOPLE 3 

,AU?OR 3 ,DAVID ,GRAEB] 

,TEXT 3 

,*APT] #a3 ,:AT ,IS A ,BULL%IT ,JOB8 

  

,LET US BEG9 ) :AT MI<T BE CONSID]$ A P>ADIGMATIC EXAMPLE ( A BULL%IT JOB4 

,KURT WORKS = A SUBCONTRACTOR = ! ,G]MAN MILIT>Y4 ,OR444 ACTUALLY1 HE IS EMPLOY$ BY A SUBCONTRACTOR ( A SUBCONTRACTOR ( A SUBCONTRACTOR = ! ,G]MAN MILIT>Y4 ,H]E IS H[ HE DESCRIBES HIS WORK3 

,! ,G]MAN MILIT>Y HAS A SUBCONTRACTOR ?AT DOES !IR ,I,T WORK4 

,! ,I,T FIRM HAS A SUBCONTRACTOR ?AT DOES !IR LOGI/ICS4 

,! LOGI/ICS FIRM HAS A SUBCONTRACTOR ?AT DOES !IR P]SONNEL MANAGEM5T1 & ,I WORK = ?AT COMPANY4 

,LET'S SAY SOLDI] ,A MOVES TO AN (FICE TWO ROOMS F>!R D[N ! HALL4 ,9/EAD ( JU/ C>RY+ HIS COMPUT] OV] !RE1 HE HAS TO FILL \T A =M4 

,! ,I,T SUBCONTRACTOR WILL GET ! =M1 PEOPLE WILL READ IT & APPROVE IT1 & =W>D IT TO ! LOGI/ICS FIRM4 

,! LOGI/ICS FIRM WILL !N HAVE TO APPROVE ! MOV+ D[N ! HALL & WILL REQUE/ P]SONNEL FROM US4 

,! (FICE PEOPLE 9 MY COMPANY WILL !N DO :ATEV] !Y DO1 & N[ ,I COME 94 

,I GET AN EMAIL3 0,BE AT B>RACKS ,B AT TIME ,C40 ,USUALLY !SE B>RACKS >E ONE HUNDR$ TO FIVE HUNDR$ KILOMET]S .<#f#b-#c#a MILES.> AWAY FROM MY HOME1 SO ,I WILL GET A R5TAL C>4 ,I TAKE ! R5TAL C>1 DRIVE TO ! B>RACKS1 LET DISPAT* KN[ ?AT ,I >RIV$1 FILL \T A =M1 UNHOOK ! COMPUT]1 LOAD ! COMPUT] 9TO A BOX1 SEAL ! BOX1 HAVE A GUY FROM ! LOGI/ICS FIRM C>RY ! BOX TO ! NEXT ROOM1 :]E ,I UNSEAL ! BOX1 FILL \T ANO!R =M1 HOOK UP ! COMPUT]1 CALL DISPAT* TO TELL !M H[ LONG ,I TOOK1 GET A C\PLE ( SIGNATURES1 TAKE MY R5TAL C> BACK HOME1 S5D DISPAT* A LETT] ) ALL ( ! PAP]WORK & !N GET PAID4 

,SO 9/EAD ( ! SOLDI] C>RY+ HIS COMPUT] = FIVE MET]S1 TWO PEOPLE DRIVE = A COMB9$ SIX TO T5 H\RS1 FILL \T >\ND FIFTE5 PAGES ( PAP]WORK1 & WA/E A GOOD F\R HUNDR$ EUROS ( TAXPAY]S' MONEY4.<#d.> 

,?IS MI<T S\ND LIKE A CLASSIC EXAMPLE ( RIDICUL\S MILIT>Y R$ TAPE ( ! SORT ,JOSEPH ,HELL] MADE FAM\S 9 HIS #aifa NOVEL ,CAT*-#b#b1 EXCEPT = ONE KEY ELEM5T3 ALMO/ NOBODY 9 ?IS /ORY ACTUALLY WORKS = ! MILIT>Y4 ,TE*NICALLY1 !Y'RE ALL P>T ( ! PRIVATE SECTOR4 ,!RE WAS A TIME1 ( C\RSE1 :5 ANY NATIONAL >MY ALSO HAD ITS [N COMMUNICATIONS1 LOGI/ICS1 & P]SONNEL DEP>TM5TS1 BUT N[ADAYS IT ALL HAS TO BE DONE ?R\< MULTIPLE LAY]S ( PRIVATE \TS\RC+4 

,KURT'S JOB MI<T BE CONSID]$ A P>ADIGMATIC EXAMPLE ( A BULL%IT JOB = ONE SIMPLE REASON3 IF ! POSITION W]E ELIM9AT$1 IT W\LD MAKE NO DISC]NIBLE DIFF]5CE 9 ! WORLD4 ,LIKELY AS NOT1 ?+S W\LD IMPROVE1 S9CE ,G]MAN MILIT>Y BASES W\LD PRESUMABLY HAVE TO COME UP ) A MORE REASONABLE WAY TO MOVE EQUIPM5T4 ,CRUCIALLY1 NOT ONLY IS ,KURT'S JOB ABSURD1 BUT ,KURT HIMSELF IS P]FECTLY WELL AW>E ( ?IS4 7,9 FACT1 ON ! BLOG :]E HE PO/$ ?IS /ORY1 HE 5D$ UP DEF5D+ ! CLAIM ?AT ! JOB S]V$ NO PURPOSE AGA9/ A HO/ ( FREE M>KET 5?USIA/S :O POPP$ UP 9/ANTLY--AS FREE M>KET 5?USIA/S T5D TO DO ON 9T]NET =UMS--TO 9SI/ ?AT S9CE HIS JOB WAS CREAT$ BY ! PRIVATE SECTOR1 IT BY DEF9ITION HAD TO S]VE A LEGITIMATE PURPOSE47 

,?IS ,I CONSID] ! DEF9+ FEATURE ( A BULL%IT JOB3 ONE SO COMPLETELY PO9TLESS ?AT EV5 ! P]SON :O HAS TO P]=M IT EV]Y DAY CANNOT CONV9CE HIMSELF !RE'S A GOOD REASON = HIM TO BE DO+ IT4 ,HE MI<T NOT BE ABLE TO ADMIT ?IS TO HIS C[ORK]S--(T5 !RE >E V]Y GOOD REASONS NOT TO DO SO4 ,BUT HE IS CONV9C$ ! JOB IS PO9TLESS NONE!LESS4 

,SO LET ?IS /& AS AN 9ITIAL PROVISIONAL DEF9ITION3 

,PROVISIONAL ,DEF9ITION3 A BULL%IT JOB IS A =M ( EMPLOYM5T ?AT IS SO COMPLETELY PO9TLESS1 UNNECESS>Y1 OR P]NICI\S ?AT EV5 ! EMPLOYEE CANNOT JU/IFY ITS EXI/5CE4 

,SOME JOBS >E SO PO9TLESS ?AT NO ONE EV5 NOTICES IF ! P]SON :O HAS ! JOB VANI%ES4 ,?IS USUALLY HAPP5S 9 ! PUBLIC SECTOR3 

,SPANI% ,CIVIL ,S]VANT ,SKIPS ,WORK = ,SIX ,YE>S TO ,/UDY ,SP9OZA 

--,JEWI% ,TIMES1 ,FEBRU>Y #b#f1 #baf 

,A ,SPANI% CIVIL S]VANT :O COLLECT$ A SAL>Y = AT LEA/ SIX YE>S )\T WORK+ US$ ! TIME TO BECOME AN EXP]T ON ! WRIT+S ( ,JEWI% PHILOSOPH] ,B>U* ,SP9OZA1 ,SPANI% M$IA REPORT$4 

,A C\RT 9 ,CADIZ 9 S\!RN ,SPA9 LA/ MON? ORD]$ ,JOAQU9 ,G>CIA1 SIXTY-N9E1 TO PAY APPROXIMATELY @s#c1 9 F9ES = FAIL+ TO %[ UP = WORK AT ! WAT] BO>D1 ,AGUA DE ,CADIZ1 :]E ,G>CIA WAS EMPLOY$ AS AN 5G9E] S9CE #a#i#i#f1 ! NEWS SITE EURONEWS4COM REPORT$ LA/ WEEK4 

,HIS ABS5CE WAS FIR/ NOTIC$ 9 #b#a1 :5 ,G>CIA WAS DUE TO RECEIVE A M$AL = LONG S]VICE4 ,DEPUTY ,MAYOR ,JORGE ,BLAS ,F]N&EZ BEGAN MAK+ 9QUIRIES ?AT L$ HIM TO DISCOV] ?AT ,G>CIA HAD NOT BE5 SE5 AT HIS (FICE 9 SIX YE>S4 

,REA*$ BY ! NEWSPAP] ,EL ,MUNDO1 UNNAM$ S\RCES CLOSE TO ,G>CIA SAID HE DEVOT$ HIMSELF 9 ! YE>S BE=E #ba TO /UDY+ ! WRIT+S ( ,SP9OZA1 A SEV5TE5?-C5TURY H]ETIC ,JEW FROM ,AM/]DAM4 ,ONE S\RCE 9T]VIEW$ BY ,EL ,MUNDO SAID ,G>CIA BECAME AN EXP]T ON ,SP9OZA BUT D5I$ CLAIMS ,G>CIA NEV] %[$ UP = WORK1 SAY+ HE CAME 9 AT IRREGUL> TIMES4.<#e.> 

,?IS /ORY MADE HEADL9ES 9 ,SPA94 ,AT A TIME :5 ! C\NTRY WAS UND]GO+ SEV]E AU/]ITY & HI< UNEMPLOYM5T1 IT SEEM$ \TRAGE\S ?AT !RE W]E CIVIL S]VANTS :O C\LD SKIP WORK = YE>S )\T ANYBODY NOTIC+4 ,G>CIA'S DEF5SE1 H[EV]1 IS NOT )\T M]IT4 ,HE EXPLA9$ ?AT :ILE HE HAD WORK$ = MANY YE>S DUTIFULLY MONITOR+ ! CITY'S WAT] TREATM5T PLANT1 ! WAT] BO>D EV5TUALLY CAME UND] ! CONTROL ( HI<]-UPS :O LOA!D HIM = HIS ,SOCIALI/ POLITICS & REFUS$ TO ASSIGN HIM ANY RESPONSIBILITIES4 ,HE F\ND ?IS SITUATION SO DEMORALIZ+ ?AT HE WAS EV5TUALLY OBLIG$ TO SEEK CL9ICAL HELP = DEPRESSION4 ,F9ALLY1 & ) ! CONCURR5CE ( HIS !RAPI/1 HE DECID$ ?AT RA!R ?AN JU/ CONT9UE TO SIT >\ND ALL DAY PRET5D+ TO LOOK BUSY1 HE W\LD CONV9CE ! WAT] BO>D HE WAS BE+ SUP]VIS$ BY ! MUNICIPALITY1 & ! MUNICIPALITY ?AT HE WAS BE+ SUP]VIS$ BY ! WAT] BO>D1 *ECK 9 IF !RE WAS A PROBLEM1 BUT O!RWISE JU/ GO HOME & DO SOME?+ USEFUL ) HIS LIFE4.<#f.> 

,SIMIL> /ORIES AB\T ! PUBLIC SECTOR APPE> AT REGUL> 9T]VALS4 ,ONE POPUL> ONE IS AB\T PO/AL C>RI]S :O DECIDE ?AT RA!R ?AN DELIV]+ ! MAIL1 !Y PREF] TO DUMP IT 9 CLOSETS1 %$S1 OR ,DUMP/]S--) ! RESULT ?AT TONS ( LETT]S & PACKAGES PILE UP = YE>S )\T ANYONE FIGUR+ IT \T4.<#g.> ,DAVID ,FO/] ,WALLACE'S NOVEL ,! ,PALE ,K+1 AB\T LIFE 9SIDE AN ,9T]NAL ,REV5UE ,S]VICE (FICE 9 ,PEORIA1 ,ILL9OIS1 GOES EV5 FUR!R3 IT CULM9ATES 9 AN AUDITOR DY+ AT HIS DESK & REMA9+ PROPP$ 9 HIS *AIR = DAYS BE=E ANYONE NOTICES4 ,?IS SEEMS PURE ABSURDI/ C>ICATURE1 BUT 9 #b#b1 SOME?+ ALMO/ EXACTLY LIKE ?IS DID HAPP5 9 ,HELS9KI4 ,A ,F9NI% TAX AUDITOR WORK+ 9 A CLOS$ (FICE SAT DEAD AT HIS DESK = MORE ?AN =TY-EI<T H\RS :ILE ?IRTY COLLEAGUES C>RI$ ON >\ND HIM4 0,PEOPLE ?\<T HE WANT$ TO WORK 9 PEACE1 & NO ONE DI/URB$ HIM10 REM>K$ HIS SUP]VISOR--:I*1 IF Y\ ?9K AB\T IT1 IS ACTUALLY RA!R ?\<TFUL4.<#h.> 

,IT'S /ORIES LIKE !SE1 ( C\RSE1 ?AT 9SPIRE POLITICIANS ALL OV] ! WORLD TO CALL = A L>G] ROLE = ! PRIVATE SECTOR--:]E1 IT IS ALWAYS CLAIM$1 SU* ABUSES W\LD NOT OCCUR4 ,& :ILE IT IS TRUE SO F> ?AT WE HAVE NOT HE>D ANY /ORIES ( ,F$,EX OR ,U,P,S EMPLOYES /[+ !IR P>CELS 9 G>D5 %$S1 PRIVATIZATION G5]ATES ITS [N1 (T5 MU* LESS G5TEEL1 V>IETIES ( MADNESS--AS ,KURT'S /ORY %[S4 ,I NE$ H>DLY PO9T \T ! IRONY 9 ! FACT ?AT ,KURT WAS1 ULTIMATELY1 WORK+ = ! ,G]MAN MILIT>Y4 ,! ,G]MAN MILIT>Y HAS BE5 ACCUS$ ( MANY ?+S OV] ! YE>S1 BUT 9EFFICI5CY WAS R>ELY ONE ( !M4 ,/ILL1 A RIS+ TIDE ( BULL%IT SOILS ALL BOATS4 ,9 ! TW5TY-FIR/ C5TURY1 EV5 PANZ] DIVISIONS HAVE COME TO BE SURR\ND$ BY A VA/ P5UMBRA ( SUB-1 SUB-SUB-1 & SUB-SUB-SUBCONTRACTORS2 TANK COMM&]S >E OBLIG$ TO P]=M COMPLEX & EXOTIC BUREAUCRATIC RITUALS 9 ORD] TO MOVE EQUIPM5T FROM ONE ROOM TO ANO!R1 EV5 AS ?OSE PROVID+ ! PAP]WORK SECRETLY PO/ ELABORATE COMPLA9TS TO BLOGS AB\T H[ IDIOTIC ! :OLE ?+ IS4 

,IF !SE CASES >E ANY?+ TO GO BY1 ! MA9 DIFF]5CE BETWE5 ! PUBLIC & PRIVATE SECTORS IS NOT ?AT EI!R IS MORE1 OR LESS1 LIKELY TO G5]ATE PO9TLESS WORK4 ,IT DOES NOT EV5 NECESS>ILY LIE 9 ! K9D ( PO9TLESS WORK EA* T5DS TO G5]ATE4 ,! MA9 DIFF]5CE IS ?AT PO9TLESS WORK 9 ! PRIVATE SECTOR IS LIKELY TO BE F> MORE CLOSELY SUP]VIS$4 ,?IS IS NOT ALWAYS ! CASE4 ,AS WE'LL LE>N1 ! NUMB] ( EMPLOYES ( BANKS1 PH>MACEUTICAL COMPANIES1 & 5G9E]+ FIRMS ALL[$ TO SP5D MO/ ( !IR TIME UPDAT+ !IR ,FACEBOOK PR(ILES IS SURPRIS+LY HI<4 ,/ILL1 9 ! PRIVATE SECTOR1 !RE >E LIMITS4 ,IF ,KURT W]E TO SIMPLY WALK (F ! JOB TO TAKE UP ! /UDY ( HIS FAVORITE SEV5TE5?-C5TURY ,JEWI% PHILOSOPH]1 HE W\LD BE SWIFTLY RELIEV$ ( HIS POSITION4 ,IF ! ,CADIZ ,WAT] ,BO>D HAD BE5 PRIVATIZ$1 ,JOAQU9 ,G>CIA MI<T WELL /ILL HAVE BE5 DEPRIV$ ( RESPONSIBILITIES BY MANAG]S :O DISLIK$ HIM1 BUT HE W\LD HAVE BE5 EXPECT$ TO SIT AT HIS DESK & PRET5D TO WORK EV]Y DAY ANYWAY1 OR F9D ALT]NATE EMPLOYM5T4 

,I WILL LEAVE READ]S TO DECIDE = !MSELVES :E!R SU* A /ATE ( AFFAIRS %\LD BE CONSID]$ AN IMPROVEM5T4 

:Y A MAFIA HIT MAN IS NOT A GOOD EXAMPLE ( A BULL%IT JOB 

  

,TO RECAP3 :AT ,I AM CALL+ 0BULL%IT JOBS0 >E JOBS ?AT >E PRIM>ILY OR 5TIRELY MADE UP ( TASKS ?AT ! P]SON DO+ ?AT JOB CONSID]S TO BE PO9TLESS1 UNNECESS>Y1 OR EV5 P]NICI\S4 ,JOBS ?AT1 W]E !Y TO DISAPPE>1 W\LD MAKE NO DIFF]5CE :ATSOEV]4 ,ABOVE ALL1 !SE >E JOBS ?AT ! HOLD]S !MSELVES FEEL %\LD NOT EXI/4 

,CONTEMPOR>Y CAPITALISM SEEMS RIDDL$ ) SU* JOBS4 ,AS ,I M5TION$ 9 ! PREFACE1 A ,Y\,GOV POLL F\ND ?AT 9 ! ,UNIT$ ,K+DOM ONLY #e P]C5T ( ?OSE :O HAD FULL-TIME JOBS W]E 5TIRELY SURE !IR JOB MADE ANY SORT ( MEAN+FUL CONTRIBUTION TO ! WORLD1 & #cg P]C5T W]E QUITE SURE IT DID NOT4 ,A POLL BY ! FIRM ,S*\T5 @& ,NELISS5 C>RI$ \T 9 ,HOLL& PUT ! LATT] NUMB] AS HI< AS #d P]C5T4.<#i.> ,IF Y\ ?9K AB\T IT1 !SE >E /AGG]+ /ATI/ICS4 ,AFT] ALL1 A V]Y L>GE P]C5TAGE ( JOBS 9VOLVES DO+ ?+S ?AT NO ONE C\LD POSSIBLY SEE AS PO9TLESS4 ,ONE MU/ ASSUME ?AT ! P]C5TAGE ( NURSES1 BUS DRIV]S1 D5TI/S1 /REET CLEAN]S1 F>M]S1 MUSIC TEA*]S1 REPAIRM51 G>D5]S1 FIREFI<T]S1 SET DESIGN]S1 PLUMB]S1 J\RNALI/S1 SAFETY 9SPECTORS1 MUSICIANS1 TAILORS1 & S*OOL CROSS+ GU>DS :O *ECK$ 0NO0 TO ! QUE/ION 0,DOES Y\R JOB MAKE ANY MEAN+FUL DIFF]5CE 9 ! WORLD80 WAS APPROXIMATELY Z]O4 ,MY [N RESE>* SUGGE/S ?AT /ORE CL]KS1 RE/AURANT WORK]S1 & O!R L[-LEVEL S]VICE PROVID]S R>ELY SEE !MSELVES AS HAV+ BULL%IT JOBS1 EI!R4 ,MANY S]VICE WORK]S HATE !IR JOBS2 BUT EV5 ?OSE :O DO >E AW>E ?AT :AT !Y DO DOES MAKE SOME SORT ( MEAN+FUL DIFF]5CE 9 ! WORLD4.<#a.> 

,SO IF #cg P]C5T TO #d P]C5T ( A C\NTRY'S WORK+ POPULATION 9SI/ !IR WORK MAKES NO DIFF]5CE :ATSOEV]1 & ANO!R SUB/ANTIAL *UNK SUSPECTS ?AT IT MI<T NOT1 ONE CAN ONLY CONCLUDE ?AT ANY (FICE WORK] :O ONE MI<T SUSPECT SECRETLY BELIEVES !MSELVES TO HAVE A BULL%IT JOB DOES1 9DE$1 BELIEVE ?IS4 

,! MA9 ?+ ,I W\LD LIKE TO DO 9 ?IS FIR/ *APT] IS TO DEF9E :AT ,I MEAN BY BULL%IT JOBS2 9 ! NEXT *APT] ,I WILL LAY \T A TYPOLOGY ( :AT ,I BELIEVE ! MA9 V>IETIES ( BULL%IT JOBS TO BE4 ,?IS WILL OP5 ! WAY1 9 LAT] *APT]S1 TO CONSID]+ H[ BULL%IT JOBS COME AB\T1 :Y !Y HAVE COME TO BE SO PREVAL5T1 & TO CONSID]+ !IR PSY*OLOGICAL1 SOCIAL1 & POLITICAL EFFECTS4 ,I AM CONV9C$ !SE EFFECTS >E DEEPLY 9SIDI\S4 ,WE HAVE CREAT$ SOCIETIES :]E MU* ( ! POPULATION1 TRAPP$ 9 USELESS EMPLOYM5T1 HAVE COME TO RES5T & DESPISE EQUALLY ?OSE :O DO ! MO/ USEFUL WORK 9 SOCIETY1 & ?OSE :O DO NO PAID WORK AT ALL4 ,BUT BE=E WE CAN ANALYZE ?IS SITUATION1 IT WILL BE NECESS>Y TO ADDRESS SOME POT5TIAL OBJECTIONS4 

,! READ] MAY HAVE NOTIC$ A C]TA9 AMBIGUITY 9 MY 9ITIAL DEF9ITION4 ,I DESCRIBE BULL%IT JOBS AS 9VOLV+ TASKS ! HOLD] CONSID]S TO BE 0PO9TLESS1 UNNECESS>Y1 OR EV5 P]NICI\S40 ,BUT1 ( C\RSE1 JOBS ?AT HAVE NO SIGNIFICANT EFFECT ON ! WORLD & JOBS ?AT HAVE P]NICI\S EFFECTS ON ! WORLD >E H>DLY ! SAME ?+4 ,MO/ ( US W\LD AGREE ?AT A ,MAFIA HIT MAN DOES MORE H>M ?AN GOOD 9 ! WORLD1 OV]ALL2 BUT C\LD Y\ REALLY CALL ,MAFIA HIT MAN A BULL%IT JOB8 ,?AT JU/ FEELS SOMEH[ WRONG4 

,AS ,SOCRATES TEA*ES US1 :5 ?IS HAPP5S--:5 \R [N DEF9ITIONS PRODUCE RESULTS ?AT SEEM 9TUITIVELY WRONG TO US--IT'S BECAUSE WE'RE NOT AW>E ( :AT WE REALLY ?9K4 7,H5CE1 HE SUGGE/S ?AT ! TRUE ROLE ( PHILOSOPH]S IS TO TELL PEOPLE :AT !Y ALREADY KN[ BUT DON'T REALIZE ?AT !Y KN[4 ,ONE C\LD >GUE ?AT AN?ROPOLOGI/S LIKE MYSELF DO SOME?+ SIMIL>47 ,! PHRASE 0BULL%IT JOBS0 CLE>LY /RIKES A *ORD ) MANY PEOPLE4 ,IT MAKES S5SE TO !M 9 SOME WAY4 ,?IS MEANS !Y HAVE1 AT LEA/ ON SOME SORT ( TACIT 9TUITIVE LEVEL1 CRIT]IA 9 !IR M9DS ?AT ALL[ !M TO SAY 0,?AT WAS SU* A BULL%IT JOB0 OR 0,?AT ONE WAS BAD1 BUT ,I W\LDN'T SAY IT WAS EXACTLY BULL%IT40 ,MANY PEOPLE ) P]NICI\S JOBS FEEL ! PHRASE FITS !M2 O!RS CLE>LY DON'T4 ,! BE/ WAY TO TEASE \T :AT ?OSE CRIT]IA >E IS TO EXAM9E BORD]L9E CASES4 

,SO1 :Y DOES IT FEEL WRONG TO SAY A HIT MAN HAS A BULL%IT JOB8.<#a#a.> 

,I SUSPECT !RE >E MULTIPLE REASONS1 BUT ONE IS ?AT ! ,MAFIA HIT MAN 7UNLIKE1 SAY1 A =EIGN CURR5CY SPECULATOR OR A BR& M>KET+ RESE>*]7 IS UNLIKELY TO MAKE FALSE CLAIMS4 ,TRUE1 A MAFIOSO WILL USUALLY CLAIM HE IS M]ELY A 0BUS9ESSMAN40 ,BUT 9S(> AS HE IS WILL+ TO [N UP TO ! NATURE ( HIS ACTUAL OCCUPATION AT ALL1 HE WILL T5D TO BE PRETTY UP FRONT AB\T :AT HE DOES4 ,HE IS UNLIKELY TO PRET5D HIS WORK IS 9 ANY WAY B5EFICIAL TO SOCIETY1 EV5 TO ! EXT5T ( 9SI/+ IT CONTRIBUTES TO ! SUCCESS ( A TEAM ?AT'S PROVID+ SOME USEFUL PRODUCT OR S]VICE 7DRUGS1 PRO/ITUTION1 & SO ON71 OR IF HE DOES1 ! PRET5SE IS LIKELY TO BE PAP] ?94 

,?IS ALL[S US TO REF9E \R DEF9ITION4 ,BULL%IT JOBS >E NOT JU/ JOBS ?AT >E USELESS OR P]NICI\S2 TYPICALLY1 !RE HAS TO BE SOME DEGREE ( PRET5SE & FRAUD 9VOLV$ AS WELL4 ,! JOBHOLD] MU/ FEEL OBLIG$ TO PRET5D ?AT !RE IS1 9 FACT1 A GOOD REASON :Y H] JOB EXI/S1 EV5 IF1 PRIVATELY1 %E F9DS SU* CLAIMS RIDICUL\S4 ,!RE HAS TO BE SOME K9D ( GAP BETWE5 PRET5SE & REALITY4 7,?IS MAKES S5SE ETYMOLOGICALLY.<#a#b.>3 0BULL%ITT+0 IS1 AFT] ALL1 A =M ( DI%ONE/Y4.<#a#c.>7 

,SO WE MI<T MAKE A SECOND PASS3 

,PROVISIONAL ,DEF9ITION #b3 A BULL%IT JOB IS A =M ( EMPLOYM5T ?AT IS SO COMPLETELY PO9TLESS1 UNNECESS>Y1 OR P]NICI\S ?AT EV5 ! EMPLOYEE CANNOT JU/IFY ITS EXI/5CE EV5 ?\< ! EMPLOYEE FEELS OBLIG$ TO PRET5D ?AT ?IS IS NOT ! CASE4 

,( C\RSE1 !RE IS ANO!R REASON :Y HIT MAN %\LD NOT BE CONSID]$ A BULL%IT JOB4 ,! HIT MAN IS NOT P]SONALLY CONV9C$ HIS JOB %\LD NOT EXI/4 ,MO/ MAFIOSI BELIEVE !Y >E P>T ( AN ANCI5T & HONORABLE TRADITION ?AT IS A VALUE 9 ITS [N RI<T1 :E!R OR NOT IT CONTRIBUTES TO ! L>G] SOCIAL GOOD4 ,?IS IS1 9CID5TALLY1 ! REASON :Y 0FEUDAL OV]LORD0 IS NOT A BULL%IT JOB1 EI!R4 ,K+S1 E>LS1 EMP]ORS1 PA%AS1 EMIRS1 SQUIRES1 ZAM9D>S1 L&LORDS1 & ! LIKE MI<T1 >GUABLY1 BE USELESS PEOPLE2 MANY ( US W\LD 9SI/ 7& ,I W\LD BE 9CL9$ TO AGREE7 ?AT !Y PLAY P]NICI\S ROLES 9 HUMAN AFFAIRS4 ,BUT !Y DON'T ?9K SO4 ,SO UNLESS ! K+ IS SECRETLY A ,M>XI/1 OR A ,REPUBLICAN1 ONE CAN SAY CONFID5TLY ?AT 0K+0 IS NOT A BULL%IT JOB4 

,?IS IS A USEFUL PO9T TO BE> 9 M9D BECAUSE MO/ PEOPLE :O DO A GREAT DEAL ( H>M 9 ! WORLD >E PROTECT$ AGA9/ ! KN[L$GE ?AT !Y DO SO4 ,OR !Y ALL[ !MSELVES TO BELIEVE ! 5DLESS ACCRETION ( PAID FLUNKIES & YES-M5 ?AT 9EVITABLY ASSEMBLE >\ND !M TO COME UP ) REASONS :Y !Y >E REALLY DO+ GOOD4 7,N[ADAYS1 !SE >E SOMETIMES REF]R$ TO AS ?9K TANKS47 ,?IS IS JU/ AS TRUE ( F9ANCIAL-SPECULAT+ 9VE/M5T BANK ,C,E,OS AS IT IS ( MILIT>Y /RONGM5 9 C\NTRIES SU* AS ,NOR? ,KOREA & ,AZ]BAIJAN4 ,MAFIOSI FAMILIES >E UNUSUAL P]HAPS BECAUSE !Y MAKE FEW SU* PRET5SIONS--BUT 9 ! 5D1 !Y >E JU/ M9IATURE1 ILLICIT V]SIONS ( ! SAME FEUDAL TRADITION1 BE+ ORIG9ALLY 5=C]S = LOCAL L&LORDS 9 ,SICILY :O HAVE OV] TIME COME TO OP]ATE ON !IR [N HOOK4.<#a#d.> 

,!RE IS ONE F9AL REASON :Y HIT MAN CANNOT BE CONSID]$ A BULL%IT JOB3 IT'S NOT 5TIRELY CLE> ?AT HIT MAN IS A 0JOB0 9 ! FIR/ PLACE4 ,TRUE1 ! HIT MAN MI<T WELL BE EMPLOY$ BY ! LOCAL CRIME BOSS 9 SOME CAPACITY OR O!R4 ,P]HAPS ! CRIME BOSS MAKES UP SOME DUMMY SECURITY JOB = HIM 9 HIS CAS9O4 ,9 ?AT CASE1 WE CAN DEF9ITELY SAY ?AT JOB IS A BULL%IT JOB4 ,BUT HE IS NOT RECEIV+ A PAY*ECK 9 HIS CAPACITY AS A HIT MAN4 

,?IS PO9T ALL[S US TO REF9E \R DEF9ITION EV5 FUR!R4 ,:5 PEOPLE SPEAK ( BULL%IT JOBS1 !Y >E G5]ALLY REF]R+ TO EMPLOYM5T ?AT 9VOLVES BE+ PAID TO WORK = SOMEONE ELSE1 EI!R ON A WAG$ OR SAL>I$ BASIS 7MO/ W\LD ALSO 9CLUDE PAID CONSULTANCIES74 ,OBVI\SLY1 !RE >E MANY SELF-EMPLOY$ PEOPLE :O MANAGE TO GET MONEY FROM O!RS BY MEANS ( FALSELY PRET5D+ TO PROVIDE !M ) SOME B5EFIT OR S]VICE 7NORMALLY WE CALL !M GRIFT]S1 SCAM >TI/S1 *>LATANS1 OR FRAUDS71 JU/ AS !RE >E SELF-EMPLOY$ PEOPLE :O GET MONEY (F O!RS BY DO+ OR ?REAT5+ TO DO !M H>M 7NORMALLY WE REF] TO !M AS MUGG]S1 BURGL>S1 EXTORTIONI/S1 OR ?IEVES74 ,9 ! FIR/ CASE1 AT LEA/1 WE CAN DEF9ITELY SPEAK ( BULL%IT1 BUT NOT ( BULL%IT JOBS1 BECAUSE !SE >5'T 0JOBS10 PROP]LY SPEAK+4 ,A CON JOB IS AN ACT1 NOT A PR(ESSION4 ,SO IS A ,BR9K'S JOB4 ,PEOPLE DO SOMETIMES SPEAK ( PR(ESSIONAL BURGL>S1 BUT ?IS IS JU/ A WAY ( SAY+ ?AT !FT IS ! BURGL>'S PRIM>Y S\RCE ( 9COME4.<#a#e.> ,NO ONE IS ACTUALLY PAY+ ! BURGL> REGUL> WAGES OR A SAL>Y TO BREAK 9TO PEOPLE'S HOMES4 ,= ?IS REASON1 ONE CANNOT SAY ?AT BURGL> IS1 PRECISELY1 A JOB1 EI!R4.<#a#f.> 

,!SE CONSID]ATIONS ALL[ US TO =MULATE :AT ,I ?9K CAN S]VE AS A F9AL WORK+ DEF9ITION3 

,F9AL ,WORK+ ,DEF9ITION3 A BULL%IT JOB IS A =M ( PAID EMPLOYM5T ?AT IS SO COMPLETELY PO9TLESS1 UNNECESS>Y1 OR P]NICI\S ?AT EV5 ! EMPLOYEE CANNOT JU/IFY ITS EXI/5CE EV5 ?\<1 AS P>T ( ! CONDITIONS ( EMPLOYM5T1 ! EMPLOYEE FEELS OBLIG$ TO PRET5D ?AT ?IS IS NOT ! CASE4 

ON ! IMPORTANCE ( ! SUBJECTIVE ELEM5T1 & ALSO1 :Y IT CAN BE ASSUM$ ?AT ?OSE :O BELIEVE !Y HAVE BULL%IT JOBS >E G5]ALLY CORRECT 

  

,?IS1 ,I ?9K1 IS A S]VICEABLE DEF9ITION2 GOOD 5\<1 ANYWAY1 = ! PURPOSES ( ?IS BOOK4 

,! ATT5TIVE READ] MAY HAVE NOTIC$ ONE REMA9+ AMBIGUITY4 ,! DEF9ITION IS MA9LY SUBJECTIVE4 ,I DEF9E A BULL%IT JOB AS ONE ?AT ! WORK] CONSID]S TO BE PO9TLESS1 UNNECESS>Y1 OR P]NICI\S--BUT ,I ALSO SUGGE/ ?AT ! WORK] IS CORRECT4.<#a#g.> ,I'M ASSUM+ !RE IS AN UND]LY+ REALITY H]E4 ,ONE REALLY HAS TO MAKE ?IS ASSUMPTION BECAUSE O!RWISE WE'D BE /UCK ) ACCEPT+ ?AT ! EXACT SAME JOB C\LD BE BULL%IT ONE DAY & NONBULL%IT ! NEXT1 DEP5D+ ON ! VAG>IES ( SOME FICKLE WORK]'S MOOD4 ,ALL ,I'M REALLY SAY+ H]E IS ?AT S9CE !RE IS SU* A ?+ AS SOCIAL VALUE1 AS AP>T FROM M]E M>KET VALUE1 BUT S9CE NO ONE HAS EV] FIGUR$ \T AN ADEQUATE WAY TO MEASURE IT1 ! WORK]'S P]SPECTIVE IS AB\T AS CLOSE AS ONE IS LIKELY TO GET TO AN ACCURATE ASSESSM5T ( ! SITUATION4.<#a#h.> 

,(T5 IT'S PRETTY OBVI\S :Y ?IS %\LD BE ! CASE3 IF AN (FICE WORK] IS REALLY SP5D+ #h P]C5T ( H] TIME DESIGN+ CAT MEMES1 H] C[ORK]S 9 ! NEXT CUBICLE MAY OR MAY NOT BE AW>E ( :AT'S GO+ ON1 BUT !RE'S NO WAY ?AT %E IS GO+ TO BE UND] ANY ILLUSIONS AB\T :AT %E'S DO+4 ,BUT EV5 9 MORE COMPLICAT$ CASES1 :]E IT'S A QUE/ION ( H[ MU* ! WORK] REALLY CONTRIBUTES TO AN ORGANIZATION1 ,I ?9K IT'S SAFE TO ASSUME ! WORK] KN[S BE/4 ,I'M AW>E ?IS POSITION WILL BE TAK5 AS CONTROV]SIAL 9 C]TA9 QU>T]S4 ,EXECUTIVES & O!R BIGWIGS WILL (T5 9SI/ ?AT MO/ PEOPLE :O WORK = A L>GE CORPORATION DON'T FULLY UND]/& !IR CONTRIBUTIONS1 S9CE ! BIG PICTURE CAN BE SE5 ONLY FROM ! TOP4 ,I AM NOT SAY+ ?IS IS 5TIRELY UNTRUE3 FREQU5TLY !RE >E SOME P>TS ( ! L>G] CONTEXT ?AT L[]-LEVEL WORK]S CANNOT SEE OR SIMPLY >5'T TOLD AB\T4 ,?IS IS ESPECIALLY TRUE IF ! COMPANY IS UP TO ANY?+ ILLEGAL4.<#a#i.> ,BUT IT'S BE5 MY EXP]I5CE ?AT ANY UND]L+ :O WORKS = ! SAME \TFIT = ANY L5G? ( TIME--SAY1 A YE> OR TWO--WILL NORMALLY BE TAK5 ASIDE & LET 9 ON ! COMPANY SECRETS4 

,TRUE1 !RE >E EXCEPTIONS4 ,SOMETIMES MANAG]S 9T5TIONALLY BREAK UP TASKS 9 SU* A WAY ?AT ! WORK]S DON'T REALLY UND]/& H[ !IR EF=TS CONTRIBUTE TO ! OV]ALL 5T]PRISE4 ,BANKS WILL (T5 DO ?IS4 ,I'VE EV5 HE>D EXAMPLES ( FACTORIES 9 ,AM]ICA :]E MANY ( ! L9E WORK]S W]E UNAW>E ( :AT ! PLANT WAS ACTUALLY MAK+2 ?\< 9 SU* CASES1 IT ALMO/ ALWAYS TURN$ \T TO BE BECAUSE ! [N]S HAD 9T5TIONALLY HIR$ PEOPLE :O DIDN'T SPEAK ,5GLI%4 ,/ILL1 9 ?OSE CASES1 WORK]S T5D TO ASSUME ?AT !IR JOBS >E USEFUL2 !Y JU/ DON'T KN[ H[4 ,G5]ALLY SPEAK+1 ,I ?9K EMPLOYES CAN BE EXPECT$ TO KN[ :AT'S GO+ ON 9 AN (FICE OR ON A %OP FLOOR1 &1 C]TA9LY1 TO UND]/& H[ !IR WORK DOES1 OR DOES NOT1 CONTRIBUTE TO ! 5T]PRISE--AT LEA/1 BETT] ?AN ANYBODY ELSE4.<#b.> ,) ! HI<]-UPS1 ?AT'S NOT ALWAYS CLE>4 ,ONE FREQU5T !ME ,I 5C\NT]$ 9 MY RESE>* WAS ( UND]L+S WOND]+ 9 EFFECT1 0,DOES MY SUP]VISOR ACTUALLY KN[ ?AT ,I SP5D EI<TY P]C5T ( MY TIME DESIGN+ CAT MEMES8 ,>E !Y JU/ PRET5D+ NOT TO NOTICE1 OR >E !Y ACTUALLY UNAW>E80 ,& S9CE ! HI<] UP ! *A9 ( COMM& Y\ >E1 ! MORE REASON PEOPLE HAVE TO HIDE ?+S FROM Y\1 ! WORSE ?IS SITUATION T5DS TO BECOME4 

,! REAL /ICKY PROBLEM COMES 9 :5 IT'S A QUE/ION ( :E!R C]TA9 K9DS ( WORK 7SAY1 TELEM>KET+1 M>KET RESE>*1 CONSULT+7 >E BULL%IT--?AT IS1 :E!R !Y CAN BE SAID TO PRODUCE ANY SORT ( POSITIVE SOCIAL VALUE4 ,H]E1 ALL ,I'M SAY+ IS ?AT IT'S BE/ TO DEF] TO ! JUDGM5T ( ?OSE :O DO ?AT K9D ( WORK4 ,SOCIAL VALUE1 AFT] ALL1 IS L>GELY JU/ :AT PEOPLE ?9K IT IS4 ,9 :I* CASE1 :O ELSE IS 9 A BETT] POSITION TO JUDGE8 ,9 ?IS 9/ANCE1 ,I'D SAY3 IF ! PREPOND]ANCE ( ?OSE 5GAG$ 9 A C]TA9 OCCUPATION PRIVATELY BELIEVE !IR WORK IS ( NO SOCIAL VALUE1 ONE %\LD PROCE$ ALONG ! ASSUMPTION !Y >E RI<T4.<#b#a.> 

,/ICKL]S WILL NO D\BT RAISE OBJECTIONS H]E TOO4 ,!Y MI<T ASK3 ,H[ CAN ONE ACTUALLY KN[ = SURE :AT ! MAJORITY ( PEOPLE WORK+ 9 AN 9DU/RY SECRETLY ?9K8 ,& ! ANSW] IS ?AT OBVI\SLY1 Y\ CAN'T4 ,EV5 IF IT W]E POSSIBLE TO CONDUCT A POLL ( LOBBYI/S OR F9ANCIAL CONSULTANTS1 IT'S NOT CLE> H[ MANY W\LD GIVE HONE/ ANSW]S4 ,:5 ,I SPOKE 9 BROAD /ROKES AB\T USELESS 9DU/RIES 9 ! ORIG9AL ESSAY1 ,I DID SO ON ! ASSUMPTION ?AT LOBBYI/S & F9ANCIAL CONSULTANTS >E1 9 FACT1 L>GELY AW>E ( !IR USELESSNESS--9DE$1 ?AT MANY IF NOT MO/ ( !M >E HAUNT$ BY ! KN[L$GE ?AT NO?+ ( VALUE W\LD BE LO/ TO ! WORLD W]E !IR JOBS SIMPLY TO DISAPPE>4 

,I C\LD BE WRONG4 ,IT IS POSSIBLE ?AT CORPORATE LOBBYI/S OR F9ANCIAL CONSULTANTS G5U9ELY SUBSCRIBE TO A !ORY ( SOCIAL VALUE ?AT HOLDS !IR WORK TO BE ESS5TIAL TO ! HEAL? & PROSP]ITY ( ! NATION4 ,IT IS POSSIBLE !Y !RE=E SLEEP SECURELY 9 !IR B$S1 CONFID5T ?AT !IR WORK IS A BLESS+ = EV]YONE >\ND !M4 ,I DON'T KN[1 BUT ,I SUSPECT ?IS IS MORE LIKELY TO BE TRUE AS ONE MOVES UP ! FOOD *A91 S9CE IT W\LD APPE> TO BE A G5]AL TRU? ?AT ! MORE H>M A CATEGORY ( P[]FUL PEOPLE DO 9 ! WORLD1 ! MORE YES-M5 & PROPAG&I/S WILL T5D TO ACCUMULATE >\ND !M1 COM+ UP ) REASONS :Y !Y >E REALLY DO+ GOOD--& ! MORE LIKELY IT IS ?AT AT LEA/ SOME ( ?OSE P[]FUL PEOPLE WILL BELIEVE !M4.<#b#b.> ,CORPORATE LOBBYI/S & F9ANCIAL CONSULTANTS C]TA9LY DO SEEM RESPONSIBLE = A DISPROPORTIONATELY L>GE %>E ( ! H>M DONE 9 ! WORLD 7AT LEA/1 H>M C>RI$ \T AS P>T ( ONE'S PR(ESSIONAL DUTIES74 ,P]HAPS !Y REALLY DO HAVE TO =CE !MSELVES TO BELIEVE 9 :AT !Y DO4 

,9 ?AT CASE1 F9ANCE & LOBBY+ W\LDN'T BE BULL%IT JOBS AT ALL2 !Y'D ACTUALLY BE MORE LIKE HIT M54 ,AT ! V]Y1 V]Y TOP ( ! FOOD *A91 ?IS DOES APPE> TO BE ! CASE4 ,I REM>K$ 9 ! ORIG9AL #bac PIECE1 = 9/ANCE1 ?AT ,I'D NEV] KN[N A CORPORATE LAWY] :O DIDN'T ?9K HIS OR H] JOB WAS BULL%IT4 ,BUT1 ( C\RSE1 ?AT'S ALSO A REFLECTION ( ! SORT ( CORPORATE LAWY]S ?AT ,I'M LIKELY TO KN[3 ! SORT :O US$ TO BE POET-MUSICIANS4 ,BUT EV5 MORE SIGNIFICANTLY3 ! SORT :O >E NOT P>TICUL>LY HI< RANK+4 ,IT'S MY IMPRESSION ?AT G5U9ELY P[]FUL CORPORATE LAWY]S ?9K !IR ROLES >E 5TIRELY LEGITIMATE4 ,OR P]HAPS !Y SIMPLY DON'T C>E :E!R !Y'RE DO+ GOOD OR H>M4 

,AT ! V]Y TOP ( ! F9ANCIAL FOOD *A91 ?AT'S C]TA9LY ! CASE4 ,9 ,APRIL #b#a#c1 BY A /RANGE CO9CID5CE1 ,I HAPP5$ TO BE PRES5T AT A CONF]5CE ON 0,FIX+ ! ,BANK+ ,SY/EM = ,GOOD0 HELD 9SIDE ! ,PHILADELPHIA ,F$]AL ,RES]VE1 :]E ,JEFFREY ,SA*S1 ! ,COLUMBIA ,UNIV]SITY ECONOMI/ MO/ FAM\S = HAV+ DESIGN$ ! 0%OCK !RAPY0 RE=MS APPLI$ TO ! =M] ,SOVIET ,UNION1 HAD A LIVE-ON-VIDEO-L9K SESSION 9 :I* HE />TL$ EV]YONE BY PRES5T+ :AT C>EFUL J\RNALI/S MI<T DESCRIBE AS AN 0UNUSUALLY C&ID0 ASSESSM5T ( ?OSE 9 *>GE ( ,AM]ICA'S F9ANCIAL 9/ITUTIONS4 ,SA*S'S TE/IMONY IS ESPECIALLY VALUABLE BECAUSE1 AS HE KEPT EMPHASIZ+1 MANY ( !SE PEOPLE W]E QUITE UP FRONT ) HIM BECAUSE !Y ASSUM$ 7NOT 5TIRELY )\T REASON7 ?AT HE WAS ON !IR SIDE3 

,LOOK1 ,I MEET A LOT ( !SE PEOPLE ON ,WALL ,/REET ON A REGUL> BASIS RI<T N[444 ,I KN[ !M4 ,!SE >E ! PEOPLE ,I HAVE LUN* )4 ,& ,I AM GO+ TO PUT IT V]Y BLUNTLY3 ,I REG>D ! MORAL 5VIRONM5T AS PA?OLOGICAL4 .<,!SE PEOPLE.> HAVE NO RESPONSIBILITY TO PAY TAXES2 !Y HAVE NO RESPONSIBILITY TO !IR CLI5TS2 !Y HAVE NO RESPONSIBILITY TO C\NT]P>TIES 9 TRANSACTIONS4 ,!Y >E T\<1 GRE$Y1 AGGRESSIVE1 & FEEL ABSOLUTELY \T ( CONTROL 9 A QUITE LIT]AL S5SE1 & !Y HAVE GAM$ ! SY/EM TO A REM>KABLE EXT5T4 ,!Y G5U9ELY BELIEVE !Y HAVE A ,GOD-GIV5 RI<T TO TAKE AS MU* MONEY AS !Y POSSIBLY CAN 9 ANY WAY ?AT !Y CAN GET IT1 LEGAL OR O!RWISE4 

,IF Y\ LOOK AT ! CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTIONS1 :I* ,I HAPP5$ TO DO YE/]DAY = ANO!R PURPOSE1 ! F9ANCIAL M>KETS >E ! NUMB] ONE CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTORS 9 ! ,U,S SY/EM N[4 ,WE HAVE A CORRUPT POLITICS TO ! CORE444 BO? P>TIES >E UP TO !IR NECKS 9 ?IS4 

,BUT :AT IT'S L$ TO IS ?IS S5SE ( IMPUNITY ?AT IS REALLY /UNN+1 & Y\ FEEL IT ON ! 9DIVIDUAL LEVEL RI<T N[4 ,& IT'S V]Y1 V]Y UNHEAL?Y1 ,I HAVE WAIT$ = F\R YE>S444 FIVE YE>S N[ TO SEE ONE FIGURE ON ,WALL ,/REET SPEAK 9 A MORAL LANGUAGE4 ,& ,I'VE HAVE NOT SE5 IT ONCE4.<#b#c.> 

,SO !RE Y\ HAVE IT4 ,IF ,SA*S WAS RI<T--& HONE/LY1 :O IS 9 A BETT] POSITION TO KN[8--!N AT ! COMM&+ HEI<TS ( ! F9ANCIAL SY/EM1 WE'RE NOT ACTUALLY TALK+ AB\T BULL%IT JOBS4 ,WE'RE NOT EV5 TALK+ AB\T PEOPLE :O HAVE COME TO BELIEVE !IR [N PROPAG&I/S4 ,REALLY WE'RE JU/ TALK+ AB\T A BUN* ( CROOKS4 

,ANO!R DI/9CTION ?AT'S IMPORTANT TO BE> 9 M9D IS BETWE5 JOBS ?AT >E PO9TLESS & JOBS ?AT >E M]ELY BAD4 ,I WILL REF] TO ! LATT] AS 0%IT JOBS10 S9CE PEOPLE (T5 DO4 

,! ONLY REASON ,I BR+ UP ! MATT] IS BECAUSE ! TWO >E SO (T5 CONFUS$--:I* IS ODD1 BECAUSE !Y'RE 9 NO WAY SIMIL>4 ,9 FACT1 !Y MI<T ALMO/ BE CONSID]$ OPPOSITES4 ,BULL%IT JOBS (T5 PAY QUITE WELL & T5D TO (F] EXCELL5T WORK+ CONDITIONS4 ,!Y'RE JU/ PO9TLESS4 ,%IT JOBS >E USUALLY NOT AT ALL BULL%IT2 !Y TYPICALLY 9VOLVE WORK ?AT NE$S TO BE DONE & IS CLE>LY ( B5EFIT TO SOCIETY2 IT'S JU/ ?AT ! WORK]S :O DO !M >E PAID & TREAT$ BADLY4 

,SOME JOBS1 ( C\RSE1 >E 9TR9SICALLY UNPLEASANT BUT FULFILL+ 9 O!R WAYS4 7,!RE'S AN OLD JOKE AB\T ! MAN :OSE JOB IT WAS TO CLEAN UP ELEPHANT DUNG AFT] ! CIRCUS4 ,NO MATT] :AT HE DID1 HE C\LDN'T GET ! SMELL (F HIS BODY4 ,HE'D *ANGE HIS CLO!S1 WA% HIS HAIR1 SCRUB HIMSELF 5DLESSLY1 BUT HE /ILL REEK$1 & WOM5 T5D$ TO AVOID HIM4 ,AN OLD FRI5D F9ALLY ASK$ HIM1 0,:Y DO Y\ DO ?IS TO Y\RSELF8 ,!RE >E SO MANY O!R JOBS Y\ C\LD DO40 ,! MAN ANSW]$1 0,:AT8 ,& GIVE UP %[ BUS9ESS6807 ,!SE JOBS CAN BE CONSID]$ NEI!R %IT NOR BULL%IT1 :ATEV] ! CONT5T ( ! WORK4 ,O!R JOBS--ORD9>Y CLEAN+1 = EXAMPLE-->E 9 NO S5SE 9H]5TLY DEGRAD+1 BUT !Y CAN EASILY BE MADE SO4 

,! CLEAN]S AT MY CURR5T UNIV]SITY1 = 9/ANCE1 >E TREAT$ V]Y BADLY4 ,AS 9 MO/ UNIV]SITIES !SE DAYS1 !IR WORK HAS BE5 \TS\RC$4 ,!Y >E EMPLOY$ NOT DIRECTLY BY ! S*OOL BUT BY AN AG5CY1 ! NAME ( :I* IS EMBLAZON$ ON ! PURPLE UNI=MS !Y WE>4 ,!Y >E PAID LITTLE1 OBLIG$ TO WORK ) DANG]\S *EMICALS ?AT (T5 DAMAGE !IR H&S OR O!RWISE =CE !M TO HAVE TO TAKE TIME (F TO RECOV] 7= :I* TIME !Y >E NOT COMP5SAT$71 & G5]ALLY TREAT$ ) >BITR>9ESS & DISRESPECT4 ,!RE IS NO P>TICUL> REASON ?AT CLEAN]S HAVE TO BE TREAT$ 9 SU* AN ABUSIVE FA%ION4 ,BUT AT ! V]Y LEA/1 !Y TAKE SOME PRIDE 9 KN[+--&1 9 FACT1 ,I CAN ATTE/1 = ! MO/ P>T DO TAKE PRIDE 9 KN[+--?AT BUILD+S DO NE$ TO BE CLEAN$1 &1 !RE=E1 )\T !M1 ! BUS9ESS ( ! UNIV]SITY C\LD NOT GO ON4.<#b#d.> 

,%IT JOBS T5D TO BE BLUE COLL> & PAY BY ! H\R1 :]EAS BULL%IT JOBS T5D TO BE :ITE COLL> & SAL>I$4 ,?OSE :O WORK %IT JOBS T5D TO BE ! OBJECT ( 9DIGNITIES2 !Y NOT ONLY WORK H>D BUT ALSO >E HELD 9 L[ E/EEM = ?AT V]Y REASON4 ,BUT AT LEA/ !Y KN[ !Y'RE DO+ SOME?+ USEFUL4 ,?OSE :O WORK BULL%IT JOBS >E (T5 SURR\ND$ BY HONOR & PRE/IGE2 !Y >E RESPECT$ AS PR(ESSIONALS1 WELL PAID1 & TREAT$ AS HI< A*IEV]S--AS ! SORT ( PEOPLE :O CAN BE JU/LY PR\D ( :AT !Y DO4 ,YET SECRETLY !Y >E AW>E ?AT !Y HAVE A*IEV$ NO?+2 !Y FEEL !Y HAVE DONE NO?+ TO E>N ! CONSUM] TOYS ) :I* !Y FILL !IR LIVES2 !Y FEEL IT'S ALL BAS$ ON A LIE--AS1 9DE$1 IT IS4 

,!SE >E TWO PR(\NDLY DIFF]5T =MS ( OPPRESSION4 ,I C]TA9LY W\LDN'T WANT TO EQUATE !M2 FEW PEOPLE ,I KN[ W\LD TRADE 9 A PO9TLESS MIDDLE-MANAGEM5T POSITION = A JOB AS A DIT*DIGG]1 EV5 IF !Y KNEW ?AT ! DIT*ES REALLY DID NE$ TO BE DUG4 7,I DO KN[ PEOPLE :O QUIT SU* JOBS TO BECOME CLEAN]S1 ?\<1 & >E QUITE HAPPY ?AT !Y DID47 ,ALL ,I WI% TO EMPHASIZE H]E IS ?AT EA* IS 9DE$ OPPRESSIVE 9 ITS [N WAY4.<#b#e.> 

,IT IS ALSO !ORETICALLY POSSIBLE TO HAVE A JOB ?AT IS BO? %IT & BULL%IT4 ,I ?9K IT'S FAIR TO SAY ?AT IF ONE IS TRY+ TO IMAG9E ! WOR/ TYPE ( JOB ONE C\LD POSSIBLY HAVE1 IT W\LD HAVE TO BE SOME K9D ( COMB9ATION ( ! TWO4 ,ONCE1 :ILE S]V+ TIME 9 EXILE AT A ,SIB]IAN PRISON CAMP1 ,DO/OYEVSKY DEVELOP$ ! !ORY ?AT ! WOR/ TORTURE ONE C\LD POSSIBLY DEVISE W\LD BE TO =CE SOMEONE TO 5DLESSLY P]=M AN OBVI\SLY PO9TLESS TASK4 ,EV5 ?\< CONVICTS S5T TO ,SIB]IA HAD !ORETICALLY BE5 S5T5C$ TO 0H>D LABOR10 HE OBS]V$1 ! WORK WASN'T ACTUALLY ALL ?AT H>D4 ,MO/ PEASANTS WORK$ F> H>D]4 ,BUT PEASANTS W]E WORK+ AT LEA/ P>TLY = !MSELVES4 ,9 PRISON CAMPS1 ! 0H>DNESS0 ( ! LABOR WAS ! FACT ?AT ! LABOR] GOT NO?+ \T ( IT3 

,IT ONCE CAME 9TO MY HEAD ?AT IF IT W]E DESIR$ TO R$UCE A MAN TO NO?+--TO PUNI% HIM ATROCI\SLY1 TO CRU% HIM 9 SU* A MANN] ?AT ! MO/ H>D5$ MURD]] W\LD TREMBLE BE=E SU* A PUNI%M5T1 & TAKE FRI<T BE=EH&--IT W\LD ONLY BE NECESS>Y TO GIVE TO HIS WORK A *>ACT] ( COMPLETE USELESSNESS1 EV5 TO ABSURDITY4 

,H>D LABOR1 AS IT IS N[ C>RI$ ON1 PRES5TS NO 9T]E/ TO ! CONVICT2 BUT IT HAS ITS UTILITY4 ,! CONVICT MAKES BRICKS1 DIGS ! E>?1 BUILDS2 & ALL HIS OCCUPATIONS HAVE A MEAN+ & AN 5D4 ,SOMETIMES ! PRISON] MAY EV5 TAKE AN 9T]E/ 9 :AT HE IS DO+4 ,HE !N WI%ES TO WORK MORE SKILLFULLY1 MORE ADVANTAGE\SLY4 ,BUT LET HIM BE CON/RA9$ TO P\R WAT] FROM ONE VESSEL 9TO ANO!R1 TO P\ND S&1 TO MOVE A HEAP ( E>? FROM ONE PLACE TO ANO!R1 & !N IMM$IATELY MOVE IT BACK AGA91 !N ,I AM P]SUAD$ ?AT AT ! 5D ( A FEW DAYS1 ! PRISON] W\LD HANG HIMSELF OR COMMIT A ?\S& CAPITAL CRIMES1 PREF]R+ RA!R TO DIE ?AN 5DURE SU* HUMILIATION1 %AME1 & TORTURE4.<#b#f.> 

ON ! COMMON MISCONCEPTION ?AT BULL%IT JOBS >E CONF9$ L>GELY TO ! PUBLIC SECTOR 

  

,SO F>1 WE HAVE E/ABLI%$ ?REE BROAD CATEGORIES ( JOBS3 USEFUL JOBS 7:I* MAY OR MAY NOT BE %IT JOBS71 BULL%IT JOBS1 & A SMALL BUT UGLY P5UMBRA ( JOBS SU* AS GANG/]S1 SLUMLORDS1 TOP CORPORATE LAWY]S1 OR H$GE FUND ,C,E,OS1 MADE UP ( PEOPLE :O >E BASICALLY JU/ SELFI% BA/>DS & DON'T REALLY PRET5D TO BE ANY?+ ELSE4.<#b#g.> ,9 EA* CASE1 ,I ?9K IT'S FAIR TO TRU/ ?AT ?OSE :O HAVE !SE JOBS KN[ BE/ :I* CATEGORY !Y BELONG TO4 ,:AT ,I'D LIKE TO DO NEXT1 BE=E TURN+ TO ! TYPOLOGY1 IS TO CLE> UP A FEW COMMON MISCONCEPTIONS4 ,IF Y\ TOSS \T ! NOTION ( BULL%IT JOBS TO SOMEONE :O HASN'T HE>D ! T]M BE=E1 ?AT P]SON MAY ASSUME Y\'RE REALLY TALK+ AB\T %IT JOBS4 ,BUT IF Y\ CL>IFY1 HE IS LIKELY TO FALL BACK ON ONE ( TWO COMMON /]EOTYPES3 HE MAY ASSUME Y\'RE TALK+ AB\T GOV]NM5T BUREAUCRATS4 ,OR1 IF HE'S A FAN ( ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS'S ,! ,HIT*HIK]'S ,GUIDE TO ! ,GALAXY1 HE MAY ASSUME Y\'RE TALK+ AB\T HAIRDRESS]S4 

,LET ME DEAL ) ! BUREAUCRATS FIR/1 S9CE IT'S ! EASIE/ TO ADDRESS4 ,I D\BT ANYONE W\LD D5Y ?AT !RE >E PL5TY ( USELESS BUREAUCRATS 9 ! WORLD4 ,:AT'S SIGNIFICANT TO ME1 ?\<1 IS ?AT N[ADAYS1 USELESS BUREAUCRATS SEEM JU/ AS RIFE 9 ! PRIVATE SECTOR AS 9 ! PUBLIC SECTOR4 ,Y\ >E AS LIKELY TO 5C\NT] AN EXASP]AT+ LITTLE MAN 9 A SUIT READ+ \T 9COMPREH5SIBLE RULES & REGULATIONS 9 A BANK OR MOBILE PHONE \TLET ?AN 9 ! PASSPORT (FICE OR ZON+ BO>D4 ,EV5 MORE1 PUBLIC & PRIVATE BUREAUCRACIES HAVE BECOME SO 9CREAS+LY 5TANGL$ ?AT IT'S (T5 V]Y DIFFICULT TO TELL !M AP>T4 ,?AT'S ONE REASON ,I />T$ ?IS *APT] ! WAY ,I DID1 ) ! /ORY ( A MAN WORK+ = A PRIVATE FIRM CONTRACT+ ) ! ,G]MAN MILIT>Y4 ,NOT ONLY DID IT HI<LI<T H[ WRONG IT IS TO ASSUME ?AT BULL%IT JOBS EXI/ L>GELY 9 GOV]NM5T BUREAUCRACIES1 BUT ALSO IT ILLU/RATES H[ 0M>KET RE=MS0 ALMO/ 9V>IABLY CREATE MORE BUREAUCRACY1 NOT LESS4.<#b#h.> ,AS ,I PO9T$ \T 9 AN E>LI] BOOK1 ,! ,UTOPIA ( ,RULES1 IF Y\ COMPLA9 AB\T GETT+ SOME BUREAUCRATIC RUN>\ND FROM Y\R BANK1 BANK (FICIALS >E LIKELY TO TELL Y\ IT'S ALL ! FAULT ( GOV]NM5T REGULATIONS2 BUT IF Y\ RESE>* :]E ?OSE REGULATIONS ACTUALLY COME FROM1 Y\'LL LIKELY DISCOV] ?AT MO/ ( !M W]E WRITT5 BY ! BANK4 

,NONE!LESS1 ! ASSUMPTION ?AT GOV]NM5T IS NECESS>ILY TOP-HEAVY ) FEA!RB$D+ & UNNECESS>Y LEVELS ( ADM9I/RATIVE HI]>*Y1 :ILE ! PRIVATE SECTOR IS LEAN & MEAN1 IS BY N[ SO FIRMLY LODG$ 9 PEOPLE'S HEADS ?AT IT SEEMS NO AM\NT ( EVID5CE WILL DISLODGE IT4 

,NO D\BT SOME ( ?IS MISCONCEPTION IS DUE TO MEMORIES ( C\NTRIES SU* AS ! ,SOVIET ,UNION1 :I* HAD A POLICY ( FULL EMPLOYM5T & WAS !RE=E OBLIG$ TO MAKE UP JOBS = EV]YONE :E!R A NE$ EXI/$ OR NOT4 ,?IS IS H[ ! ,U,S,S,R 5D$ UP ) %OPS :]E CU/OM]S HAD TO GO ?R\< ?REE DIFF]5T CL]KS TO BUY A LOAF ( BREAD1 OR ROAD CREWS :]E1 AT ANY GIV5 MOM5T1 TWO-?IRDS ( ! WORK]S W]E DR9K+1 PLAY+ C>DS1 OR DOZ+ (F4 ,?IS IS ALWAYS REPRES5T$ AS EXACTLY :AT W\LD NEV] HAPP5 UND] CAPITALISM4 ,! LA/ ?+ A PRIVATE FIRM1 COMPET+ ) O!R PRIVATE FIRMS1 W\LD DO IS TO HIRE PEOPLE IT DOESN'T ACTUALLY NE$4 ,IF ANY?+1 ! USUAL COMPLA9T AB\T CAPITALISM IS ?AT IT'S TOO EFFICI5T1 ) PRIVATE WORKPLACES 5DLESSLY H\ND+ EMPLOYES ) CON/ANT SPE$-UPS1 QUOTAS1 & SURVEILLANCE4 

,OBVI\SLY1 ,I'M NOT GO+ TO D5Y ?AT ! LATT] IS (T5 ! CASE4 ,9 FACT1 ! PRESSURE ON CORPORATIONS TO D[NSIZE & 9CREASE EFFICI5CY HAS R$\BL$ S9CE ! M]G]S & ACQUISITIONS FR5ZY ( ! #a#i#hS4 ,BUT ?IS PRESSURE HAS BE5 DIRECT$ ALMO/ EXCLUSIVELY AT ! PEOPLE AT ! BOTTOM ( ! PYRAMID1 ! ONES :O >E ACTUALLY MAK+1 MA9TA9+1 FIX+1 OR TRANSPORT+ ?+S4 ,ANYONE =C$ TO WE> A UNI=M 9 ! EX]CISE ( HIS DAILY LABORS1 = 9/ANCE1 IS LIKELY TO BE H>D-PRESS$4.<#b#i.> ,F$,EX & ,U,P,S DELIV]Y WORK]S HAVE BACKBREAK+ S*$ULES DESIGN$ ) 0SCI5TIFIC0 EFFICI5CY4 ,9 ! UPP] E*ELONS ( ?OSE SAME COMPANIES1 ?+S >E NOT ! SAME4 ,WE CAN1 IF WE LIKE1 TRACE ?IS BACK TO ! KEY WEAKNESS 9 ! MANAG]IAL CULT ( EFFICI5CY--ITS ,A*ILLES' HEEL1 IF Y\ WILL4 ,:5 MANAG]S BEGAN TRY+ TO COME UP ) SCI5TIFIC /UDIES ( ! MO/ TIME- & 5]GY-EFFICI5T WAYS TO DEPLOY HUMAN LABOR1 !Y NEV] APPLI$ ?OSE SAME TE*NIQUES TO !MSELVES--OR IF !Y DID1 ! EFFECT APPE>S TO HAVE BE5 ! OPPOSITE ( :AT !Y 9T5D$4 ,AS A RESULT1 ! SAME P]IOD ?AT SAW ! MO/ RU?LESS APPLICATION ( SPE$-UPS & D[NSIZ+ 9 ! BLUE-COLL> SECTOR ALSO BR\<T A RAPID MULTIPLICATION ( MEAN+LESS MANAG]IAL & ADM9I/RATIVE PO/S 9 ALMO/ ALL L>GE FIRMS4 ,IT'S AS IF BUS9ESSES W]E 5DLESSLY TRIMM+ ! FAT ON ! %OP FLOOR & US+ ! RESULT+ SAV+S TO ACQUIRE EV5 MORE UNNECESS>Y WORK]S 9 ! (FICES UP/AIRS4 7,AS WE'LL SEE1 9 SOME COMPANIES1 ?IS WAS LIT]ALLY ! CASE47 ,! 5D RESULT WAS ?AT1 JU/ AS ,SOCIALI/ REGIMES HAD CREAT$ MILLIONS ( DUMMY PROLET>IAN JOBS1 CAPITALI/ REGIMES SOMEH[ 5D$ UP PRESID+ OV] ! CREATION ( MILLIONS ( DUMMY :ITE-COLL> JOBS 9/EAD4 

,WE'LL EXAM9E H[ ?IS HAPP5$ 9 DETAIL LAT] 9 ! BOOK4 ,= N[1 LET ME JU/ EMPHASIZE ?AT ALMO/ ALL ! DYNAMICS WE WILL BE DESCRIB+ HAPP5 EQUALLY 9 ! PUBLIC & PRIVATE SECTORS1 & ?AT ?IS IS H>DLY SURPRIS+1 CONSID]+ ?AT TODAY1 ! TWO SECTORS >E ALMO/ IMPOSSIBLE TO TELL AP>T4 

:Y HAIRDRESS]S >E A POOR EXAMPLE ( A BULL%IT JOB 

  

,IF ONE COMMON REACTION IS TO BLAME GOV]NM5T1 ANO!R IS1 ODDLY1 TO BLAME WOM54 ,ONCE Y\ PUT ASIDE ! NOTION ?AT Y\'RE ONLY TALK+ AB\T GOV]NM5T BUREAUCRATS1 MANY WILL ASSUME Y\ MU/ BE TALK+ ABOVE ALL AB\T SECRET>IES1 RECEPTIONI/S1 & V>I\S SORTS ( 7TYPICALLY FEMALE7 ADM9I/RATIVE /AFF4 ,N[1 CLE>LY1 MANY SU* ADM9I/RATIVE JOBS >E 9DE$ BULL%IT BY ! DEF9ITION DEVELOP$ H]E1 BUT ! ASSUMPTION ?AT IT'S MA9LY WOM5 :O 5D UP 9 BULL%IT JOBS IS NOT ONLY SEXI/ BUT ALSO REPRES5TS1 TO MY M9D1 A PR(\ND IGNORANCE ( H[ MO/ (FICES ACTUALLY WORK4 ,IT'S F> MORE LIKELY ?AT ! 7FEMALE7 ADM9I/RATIVE ASSI/ANT = A 7MALE7 VICE DEAN OR 0,/RATEGIC ,NETWORK ,MANAG]0 IS ! ONLY P]SON DO+ ANY REAL WORK 9 ?AT (FICE1 & ?AT IT'S H] BOSS :O MI<T AS WELL BE L\NG+ >\ND 9 HIS (FICE PLAY+ ,WORLD ( ,W>CRAFT1 OR V]Y POSSIBLY1 ACTUALLY IS4 

,I WILL RETURN TO ?IS DYNAMIC 9 ! NEXT *APT] :5 WE EXAM9E ! ROLE ( FLUNKIES2 H]E ,I WILL JU/ EMPHASIZE ?AT WE DO HAVE /ATI/ICAL EVID5CE 9 ?IS REG>D4 ,:ILE ! ,Y\,GOV SURVEY DIDN'T BREAK D[N ITS RESULTS BY OCCUPATION1 :I* IS A %AME1 IT DID BREAK !M D[N BY G5D]4 ,! RESULT WAS TO REVEAL ?AT M5 >E F> MORE LIKELY TO FEEL ?AT !IR JOBS >E PO9TLESS 7#d#b P]C5T7 ?AN WOM5 DO 7#c#b P]C5T74 ,AGA91 IT SEEMS REASONABLE TO ASSUME ?AT !Y >E RI<T4.<#c.> 

,F9ALLY1 ! HAIRDRESS]S4 ,I'M AFRAID TO SAY ?AT ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS HAS A LOT TO ANSW] = H]E4 ,SOMETIMES IT SEEM$ TO ME ?AT :5EV] ,I W\LD PROPOSE ! NOTION ?AT A L>GE P]C5TAGE ( ! WORK BE+ DONE 9 \R SOCIETY WAS UNNECESS>Y1 SOME MAN 7IT WAS ALWAYS A MAN7 W\LD POP UP & SAY1 0,OH1 YES1 Y\ MEAN1 LIKE1 HAIRDRESS]S80 ,!N HE W\LD USUALLY MAKE IT CLE> ?AT HE WAS REF]R+ TO ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS'S SCI-FI COM$IC NOVEL ,! ,RE/AURANT AT ! ,5D ( ! ,UNIV]SE1 9 :I* ! LEAD]S ( A PLANET CALL$ ,GOLGAFR9*AM DECIDE TO RID !MSELVES ( !IR MO/ USELESS 9HABITANTS BY CLAIM+1 FALSELY1 ?AT ! PLANET IS AB\T TO BE DE/ROY$4 ,TO DEAL ) ! CRISIS !Y CREATE AN 0,>K ,FLEET0 ( ?REE %IPS1 ,A1 ,B1 & ,C1 ! FIR/ TO CONTA9 ! CREATIVE ?IRD ( ! POPULATION1 ! LA/ TO 9CLUDE BLUE-COLL> WORK]S1 & ! MIDDLE ONE TO CONTA9 ! USELESS REMA9D]4 ,ALL >E TO BE PLAC$ 9 SUSP5D$ ANIMATION & S5T TO A NEW WORLD2 EXCEPT ?AT ONLY ! ,B %IP IS ACTUALLY BUILT & IT IS S5T ON A COLLISION C\RSE ) ! SUN4 ,! BOOK'S H]OES ACCID5TALLY F9D !MSELVES ON ,%IP ,B1 9VE/IGAT+ A HALL FULL ( MILLIONS ( SPACE S>COPHAGI1 FULL ( SU* USELESS PEOPLE :OM !Y 9ITIALLY ASSUME TO BE DEAD4 ,ONE BEG9S READ+ (F ! PLAQUES NEXT TO EA* S>COPHAGUS3  
  

0,IT SAYS ',GOLGAFR9*AM ,>K ,FLEET1 ,%IP ,B1 ,HOLD ,SEV51 ,TELEPHONE ,SANITIZ]1 ,SECOND ,CLASS'--& A S]IAL NUMB]40 

0,A TELEPHONE SANITIZ]80 SAID ,>?UR4 0,A DEAD TELEPHONE SANITIZ]80 

0,BE/ K9D40 

0,BUT :AT'S HE DO+ H]E80 

,=D PE]$ ?R\< ! TOP AT ! FIGURE )94 

0,NOT A LOT10 HE SAID1 & SUDD5LY FLA%$ ONE ( ?OSE GR9S ( HIS :I* ALWAYS MADE PEOPLE ?9K HE'D BE5 OV]DO+ ?+S REC5TLY & %\LD TRY TO GET SOME RE/4 

,HE SCAMP]$ OV] TO ANO!R S>COPHAGUS4 ,A MOM5T'S BRISK T[EL WORK1 & HE ANN\NC$3 

0,?IS ONE'S A DEAD HAIRDRESS]4 ,HOOPY60 

,! NEXT S>COPHAGUS REVEAL$ ITSELF TO BE ! LA/ RE/+ PLACE ( AN ADV]TIS+ ACC\NT EXECUTIVE2 ! ONE AFT] ?AT CONTA9$ A SECONDH& C> SALESMAN1 ?IRD CLASS4.<#c#a.>  
  

,N[1 IT'S OBVI\S :Y ?IS /ORY MI<T SEEM RELEVANT TO ?OSE :O FIR/ HE> ( BULL%IT JOBS1 BUT ! LI/ IS ACTUALLY QUITE ODD4 ,= ONE ?+1 PR(ESSIONAL TELEPHONE SANITIZ]S DON'T REALLY EXI/1.<#c#b.> & :ILE ADV]TIS+ EXECUTIVES & US$-C> SALESM5 DO--& >E 9DE$ PR(ESSIONS SOCIETY C\LD >GUABLY BE BETT] (F )\T--= SOME REASON1 :5 ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS AFICIONADOS RECALL ! /ORY1 IT'S ALWAYS ! HAIRDRESS]S !Y REMEMB]4 

,I WILL BE HONE/ H]E4 ,I HAVE NO P>TICUL> BONE TO PICK ) ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS2 9 FACT1 ,I HAVE A FONDNESS = ALL MANIFE/ATIONS ( HUMOR\S ,BRITI% SEV5TIES SCI-FI2 BUT NONE!LESS1 ,I F9D ?IS P>TICUL> FANTASY AL>M+LY CONDESC5D+4 ,FIR/ ( ALL1 ! LI/ IS NOT REALLY A LI/ ( USELESS PR(ESSIONS AT ALL4 ,IT'S A LI/ ( ! SORT ( PEOPLE A MIDDLE-CLASS BOHEMIAN LIV+ 9 ,ISL+TON >\ND ?AT TIME W\LD F9D MILDLY ANNOY+4 ,DOES ?AT MEAN ?AT !Y DES]VE TO DIE8.<#c#c.> ,MYSELF1 ,I FANTASIZE AB\T ELIM9AT+ ! JOBS1 NOT ! PEOPLE :O HAVE TO DO !M4 ,TO JU/IFY EXT]M9ATION1 ,ADAMS SEEMS TO HAVE 9T5TIONALLY SELECT$ PEOPLE ?AT HE ?\<T W]E NOT ONLY USELESS BUT ALSO C\LD BE ?\<T ( AS EMBRAC+ OR ID5TIFY+ ) :AT !Y DID4 

,BE=E MOV+ ON1 !N1 LET US REFLECT ON ! /ATUS ( HAIRDRESS]S4 ,:Y IS A HAIRDRESS] NOT A BULL%IT JOB8 ,WELL1 ! MO/ OBVI\S REASON IS PRECISELY BECAUSE MO/ HAIRDRESS]S DO NOT BELIEVE IT TO BE ONE4 ,TO CUT & /YLE HAIR MAKES A DEMON/RABLE DIFF]5CE 9 ! WORLD1 & ! NOTION ?AT IT IS UNNECESS>Y VANITY IS PURELY SUBJECTIVE3 ,:O IS TO SAY :OSE JUDGM5T ( ! 9TR9SIC VALUE ( HAIR/YL+ IS CORRECT8 ,ADAMS'S FIR/ NOVEL1 ,! ,HIT*HIK]'S ,GUIDE TO ! ,GALAXY1 :I* BECAME SOME?+ ( A CULTURAL PH5OM5ON1 WAS PUBLI%$ 9 #a#i#g#i4 ,I WELL REMEMB]1 AS A TE5AG] 9 ,NEW ,YORK 9 ?AT YE>1 OBS]V+ H[ SMALL CR[DS W\LD (T5 GA!R \TSIDE ! B>B]%OP ON ,A/OR ,PLACE TO WAT* PUNK ROCK]S GET ELABORATE PURPLE MOHAWKS4 ,WAS ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS SUGGE/+ ?OSE GIV+ !M ! MOHAWKS ALSO DES]V$ TO DIE1 OR JU/ ?OSE HAIRDRESS]S :OSE /YLE S5SE HE DID NOT APPRECIATE8 ,9 WORK+-CLASS COMMUNITIES1 HAIR P>LORS (T5 S]VE AS GA!R+ PLACES2 WOM5 ( A C]TA9 AGE & BACKGR\ND >E KN[N TO SP5D H\RS AT ! NEI<BORHOOD HAIR P>LOR1 :I* BECOMES A PLACE TO SWAP LOCAL NEWS & GOSSIP4.<#c#d.> ,IT'S H>D TO ESCAPE ! IMPRESSION1 ?\<1 ?AT 9 ! M9DS ( ?OSE :O 9VOKE HAIRDRESS]S AS A PRIME EXAMPLE ( A USELESS JOB1 ?IS IS PRECISELY ! PROBLEM4 ,!Y SEEM TO BE IMAG9+ A GAGGLE ( MIDDLE-AG$ WOM5 IDLY GOSSIP+ UND] !IR METALLIC HELMETS :ILE O!RS FUSS AB\T MAK+ SOME M>G9AL ATTEMPTS AT BEAUTIFICATION ON A P]SON :O 7IT IS SUGGE/$71 BE+ TOO FAT1 TOO OLD1 & TOO WORK+ CLASS1 WILL NEV] BE ATTRACTIVE NO MATT] :AT IS DONE TO H]4 ,IT'S BASICALLY JU/ SNOBB]Y1 ) A DOSE ( GRATUIT\S SEXISM ?R[N 94 

,LOGICALLY1 OBJECT+ TO HAIRDRESS]S ON ?IS BASIS MAKES AB\T AS MU* S5SE AS SAY+ RUNN+ A B[L+ ALLEY OR PLAY+ BAGPIPES IS A BULL%IT JOB BECAUSE Y\ P]SONALLY DON'T 5JOY B[L+ OR BAGPIPE MUSIC & DON'T MU* LIKE ! SORT ( PEOPLE :O DO4 

,N[1 SOME MI<T FEEL ,I AM BE+ UNFAIR4 ,H[ DO Y\ KN[1 !Y MI<T OBJECT1 ?AT ,D\GLAS ,ADAMS WASN'T REALLY ?9K+1 NOT ( ?OSE :O HAIRDRESS = ! POOR1 BUT ( ?OSE :O HAIRDRESS = ! V]Y RI*8 ,:AT AB\T SUP]PO% HAIRDRESS]S :O *>GE 9SANE AM\NTS ( MONEY TO MAKE ! DAU<T]S ( F9ANCI]S OR MOVIE EXECUTIVES LOOK ODD 9 SOME UP-TO-!-MOM5T FA%ION8 ,MI<T !Y NOT H>BOR A SECRET SUSPICION ?AT !IR WORK IS VALUELESS1 EV5 P]NICI\S8 ,W\LD NOT ?AT !N QUALIFY !M AS HAV+ A BULL%IT JOB8 

,9 !ORY1 ( C\RSE1 WE MU/ ALL[ ?IS C\LD BE CORRECT4 ,BUT LET US EXPLORE ! POSSIBILITY MORE DEEPLY4 ,OBVI\SLY1 !RE IS NO OBJECTIVE MEASURE ( QUALITY :]EBY ONE CAN SAY ?AT HAIRCUT ,X IS WOR? @s#a#e1 HAIRCUT ,Y1 @s#a#e1 & HAIRCUT ,Z1 @s#a1#e4 ,9 ! LATT] CASE1 MO/ ( ! TIME1 :AT ! CU/OM] IS PAY+ = ANYWAY IS MA9LY JU/ ! ABILITY TO SAY %E PAID @s#a1#e = A HAIRCUT1 OR P]HAPS ?AT HE GOT HIS HAIR DONE BY ! SAME /YLI/ AS ,KIM ,K>DA%IAN OR ,TOM ,CRUISE4 ,WE >E SPEAK+ ( OV]T DISPLAYS ( WA/EFULNESS & EXTRAVAGANCE4 ,N[1 ONE C\LD C]TA9LY MAKE ! >GUM5T ?AT !RE'S A DEEP /RUCTURAL AFF9ITY BETWE5 WA/EFUL EXTRAVAGANCE & BULL%IT1 & !ORI/S ( ECONOMIC PSY*OLOGY FROM ,?OR/E9 ,VEBL51 TO ,SIGMUND ,FREUD1 TO ,GEORGES ,BATAILLE HAVE PO9T$ \T ?AT AT ! V]Y P9NACLE ( ! WEAL? PYRAMID--?9K H]E ( ,DONALD ,TRUMP'S GILD$ ELEVATORS--!RE IS A V]Y ?9 L9E BETWE5 EXTREME LUXURY & TOTAL CRAP4 7,!RE'S A REASON :Y 9 DREAMS1 GOLD IS (T5 SYMBOLIZ$ BY EXCREM5T1 & VICE V]SA47 

,:AT'S MORE1 !RE IS 9DE$ A LONG LIT]>Y TRADITION--/>T+ ) ! ,FR5* WRIT] ,EMILE ,ZOLA'S ,AU ,BONHEUR DES ,DAMES 7,! ,LADIES' ,DELI<T7 79 #a#h#h#c7 & RUNN+ ?R\< 9NUM]ABLE ,BRITI% COM$Y R\T9ES--CELEBRAT+ ! PR(\ND FEEL+S ( CONTEMPT & LOA?+ ?AT M]*ANTS & SALES /AFF 9 RETAIL \TLETS (T5 FEEL = BO? !IR CLI5TS & ! PRODUCTS !Y SELL !M4 ,IF ! RETAIL WORK] G5U9ELY BELIEVES ?AT HE PROVIDES NO?+ ( VALUE TO HIS CU/OM]S1 CAN WE !N SAY ?AT RETAIL WORK] DOES1 9DE$1 HAVE A BULL%IT JOB8 ,I W\LD SAY ! TE*NICAL ANSW]1 ACCORD+ TO \R WORK+ DEF9ITION1 W\LD HAVE TO BE YES2 BUT AT LEA/ ACCORD+ TO MY [N RESE>*1 ! NUMB] ( RETAIL WORK]S :O FEEL ?IS WAY IS ACTUALLY QUITE SMALL4 ,PURVEYORS ( EXP5SIVE P]FUMES MI<T ?9K !IR PRODUCTS >E OV]PRIC$ & !IR CLI5TS >E MO/LY BOORI% IDIOTS1 BUT !Y R>ELY FEEL ! P]FUME 9DU/RY ITSELF %\LD BE ABOLI%$4 

,MY [N RESE>* 9DICAT$ ?AT )9 ! S]VICE ECONOMY1 !RE W]E ONLY ?REE SIGNIFICANT EXCEPTIONS TO ?IS RULE3 9=MATION TE*NOLOGY 7,I,T7 PROVID]S1 TELEM>KET]S1 & SEX WORK]S4 ,MANY ( ! FIR/ CATEGORY1 & PRETTY MU* ALL ( ! SECOND1 W]E CONV9C$ !Y W]E BASICALLY 5GAG$ 9 SCAMS4 ,! F9AL EXAMPLE IS MORE COMPLICAT$ & PROBABLY MOVES US 9TO T]RITORY ?AT EXT5DS BEYOND ! PRECISE CONF9ES ( 0BULL%IT JOB0 9TO SOME?+ MORE P]NICI\S1 BUT ,I ?9K IT'S WOR? TAK+ NOTE ( NONE!LESS4 ,:ILE ,I WAS CONDUCT+ RESE>*1 A NUMB] ( WOM5 WROTE TO ME OR TOLD ME AB\T !IR TIME AS POLE DANC]S1 ,PLAYBOY ,CLUB BUNNIES1 FREQU5T]S ( 0,SUG> ,DADDY0 WEBSITES & ! LIKE1 & SUGGE/$ ?AT SU* OCCUPATIONS %\LD BE M5TION$ 9 MY BOOK4 ,! MO/ COMPELL+ >GUM5T TO ?IS EFFECT WAS FROM A =M] EXOTIC DANC]1 N[ PR(ESSOR1 :O MADE A CASE ?AT MO/ SEX WORK %\LD BE CONSID]$ A BULL%IT JOB BECAUSE1 :ILE %E ACKN[L$G$ ?AT SEX WORK CLE>LY DID ANSW] A G5U9E CONSUM] DEM&1 SOME?+ WAS T]RIBLY1 T]RIBLY WRONG ) ANY SOCIETY ?AT EFFECTIVELY TELLS ! VA/ MAJORITY ( ITS FEMALE POPULATION !Y >E WOR? MORE DANC+ ON BOXES BETWE5 ! AGES ( EI<TE5 & TW5TY-FIVE ?AN !Y WILL BE AT ANY SUBSEQU5T PO9T 9 !IR LIVES1 :ATEV] !IR TAL5TS OR ACCOMPLI%M5TS4 ,IF ! SAME WOMAN CAN MAKE FIVE TIMES AS MU* MONEY /RIPP+ AS %E C\LD TEA*+ AS A WORLD-RECOGNIZ$ S*OL>1 C\LD NOT ! /RIPP+ JOB BE CONSID]$ BULL%IT SIMPLY ON ?AT BASIS8.<#c#e.> 

,IT'S H>D TO D5Y ! P[] ( H] >GUM5T4 7,ONE MI<T ADD ?AT ! MUTUAL CONTEMPT BETWE5 S]VICE PROVID] & S]VICE US] 9 ! SEX 9DU/RY IS (T5 F> GREAT] ?AN :AT ONE MI<T EXPECT TO F9D 9 EV5 ! FANCIE/ B\TIQUE47 ,! ONLY OBJECTION ,I C\LD REALLY RAISE H]E IS ?AT H] >GUM5T MI<T NOT GO F> 5\<4 ,IT'S NOT SO MU* ?AT /RIPP] IS A BULL%IT JOB1 P]HAPS1 BUT ?AT ?IS SITUATION %[S US TO BE LIV+ 9 A BULL%IT SOCIETY4.<#c#f.> 

ON ! DIFF]5CE BETWE5 P>TLY BULL%IT JOBS1 MO/LY BULL%IT JOBS1 & PURELY & 5TIRELY BULL%IT JOBS 

  

,F9ALLY1 ,I MU/ V]Y BRIEFLY ADDRESS ! 9EVITABLE QUE/ION3 ,:AT AB\T JOBS ?AT >E JU/ P>TLY BULL%IT8 

,?IS IS A T\< ONE BECAUSE !RE >E V]Y FEW JOBS ?AT DON'T 9VOLVE AT LEA/ A FEW PO9TLESS OR IDIOTIC ELEM5TS4 ,TO SOME DEGREE1 ?IS IS PROBABLY JU/ ! 9EVITABLE SIDE EFFECT ( ! WORK+S ( ANY COMPLEX ORGANIZATION4 ,/ILL1 IT'S CLE> !RE IS A PROBLEM & ! PROBLEM IS GETT+ WORSE4 ,I DON'T ?9K ,I KN[ ANYONE :O HAS HAD ! SAME JOB = ?IRTY YE>S OR MORE :O DOESN'T FEEL ?AT ! BULL%IT QUOTI5T HAS 9CREAS$ OV] ! TIME HE OR %E HAS BE5 DO+ IT4 ,I MI<T ADD ?AT ?IS IS C]TA9LY TRUE ( MY [N WORK AS A PR(ESSOR4 ,TEA*]S 9 HI<] $UCATION SP5D 9CREAS+ AM\NTS ( TIME FILL+ \T ADM9I/RATIVE PAP]WORK4 ,?IS CAN ACTUALLY BE DOCUM5T$1 S9CE ONE ( ! PO9TLESS TASKS WE >E ASK$ TO DO 7& NEV] US$ TO BE ASK$ TO DO7 IS TO FILL \T QU>T]LY TIME ALLOCATION SURVEYS 9 :I* WE RECORD PRECISELY H[ MU* TIME EA* WEEK WE SP5D ON ADM9I/RATIVE PAP]WORK4 ,ALL 9DICATIONS SUGGE/ ?AT ?IS TR5D IS GA!R+ /EAM4 ,AS ! ,FR5* V]SION ( ,SLATE MAGAZ9E NOT$ 9 #b#a#c1 0LA BULL%ITISATION DE L'ECONOMIE N'5 E/ QU'A SES DEBUTS40 7,! BULL%ITIZATION ( ! ECONOMY HAS ONLY JU/ BEGUN47.<#c#g.> 

,H[EV] 9EXORABLE1 ! PROCESS ( BULL%ITIZATION IS HI<LY 9CONSI/5T4 ,IT HAS1 = OBVI\S REASONS1 AFFECT$ MIDDLE-CLASS EMPLOYM5T MORE ?AN WORK+-CLASS EMPLOYM5T1 & )9 ! WORK+ CLASS1 IT HAS BE5 TRADITIONALLY FEMALE1 C>EGIV+ WORK ?AT HAS BE5 ! MA9 T>GET ( BULL%ITIZATION3 MANY NURSES1 = 9/ANCE1 COMPLA9$ TO ME ?AT AS MU* AS #h P]C5T ( !IR TIME IS N[ TAK5 UP ) PAP]WORK1 MEET+S1 & ! LIKE1 :ILE TRUCK DRIV]S & BRICKLAY]S /ILL C>RY ON L>GELY UNAFFECT$4 ,9 ?IS >EA1 WE DO HAVE SOME /ATI/ICS4 ,FIGURE #a IS EXC]PT$ FROM ! ,U,S $ITION ( ! #b#a#f-#b#a#g ,/ATE ( ,5T]PRISE ,WORK ,REPORT 7SEE NEXT PAGE74 

,ACCORD+ TO ?IS SURVEY1 ! AM\NT ( TIME ,AM]ICAN (FICE WORK]S SAY !Y DEVOT$ TO !IR ACTUAL DUTIES DECL9$ FROM #df P]C5T 9 #bae TO #ci P]C5T 9 #b#a#f1 [+ TO A PROPORTIONATE RISE 9 TIME DEAL+ ) EMAILS 7UP FROM #ab P]C5T TO #af P]C5T71 0WA/EFUL0 MEET+S 7#h P]C5T TO #a P]C5T71 & ADM9I/RATIVE TASKS 7#i P]C5T TO #aa P]C5T74 ,FIGURES ?AT DRAMATIC MU/ BE P>TLY ! RESULT ( R&OM /ATI/ICAL NOISE--AFT] ALL1 IF SU* TR5DS REALLY CONT9U$1 9 LESS ?AN A DECADE1 NO ,U,S (FICE WORK] W\LD BE DO+ ANY REAL WORK AT ALL--BUT IF NO?+ ELSE1 ! SURVEY MAKES ABUNDANTLY CLE> ?AT 7#a7 MORE ?AN HALF ( WORK+ H\RS 9 ,AM]ICAN (FICES >E SP5T ON BULL%IT1 & 7#b7 ! PROBLEM IS GETT+ WORSE4 

,AS A RESULT1 IT IS 9DE$ POSSIBLE TO SAY !RE >E P>TLY BULL%IT JOBS1 MO/LY BULL%IT JOBS1 & PURELY & 5TIRELY BULL%IT JOBS4 ,?IS JU/ HAPP5S TO BE A BOOK AB\T ! LATT] 7OR1 TO BE PRECISE1 AB\T 5TIRELY OR OV]:ELM+LY BULL%IT JOBS--NOT MO/LY BULL%IT JOBS1 :]E ! MET] HOV]S ANY:]E NE> #e P]C5T74  

 ,FIGURE #a  

,9 NO S5SE AM ,I D5Y+ ?AT ! BULL%ITIZATION ( ALL ASPECTS ( ! ECONOMY IS A CRITICALLY IMPORTANT SOCIAL ISSUE4 ,SIMPLY CONSID] ! FIGURES CIT$ E>LI]4 ,IF #cg P]C5T TO #d P]C5T ( JOBS >E COMPLETELY PO9TLESS1 & AT LEA/ #e P]C5T ( ! WORK DONE 9 NONPO9TLESS (FICE JOBS IS EQUALLY PO9TLESS1 WE CAN PROBABLY CONCLUDE ?AT AT LEA/ HALF ( ALL WORK BE+ DONE 9 \R SOCIETY C\LD BE ELIM9AT$ )\T MAK+ ANY REAL DIFF]5CE AT ALL4 ,ACTUALLY1 ! NUMB] IS ALMO/ C]TA9LY HI<]1 BECAUSE ?IS W\LD NOT EV5 BE TAK+ 9TO CONSID]ATION SECOND-ORD] BULL%IT JOBS3 REAL JOBS DONE 9 SUPPORT ( ?OSE 5GAG$ 9 BULL%IT4 7,I'LL DISCUSS !SE 9 *APT] #b47 ,WE C\LD EASILY BECOME SOCIETIES ( LEISURE & 9/ITUTE A TW5TY-H\R WORKWEEK4 ,MAYBE EV5 A FIFTE5-H\R WEEK4 ,9/EAD1 WE F9D \RSELVES1 AS A SOCIETY1 CONDEMN$ TO SP5D+ MO/ ( \R TIME AT WORK1 P]=M+ TASKS ?AT WE FEEL MAKE NO DIFF]5CE 9 ! WORLD :ATSOEV]4 

,9 ! RE/ ( ?IS BOOK1 ,I WILL EXPLORE H[ WE 5D$ UP 9 ?IS AL>M+ /ATE ( AFFAIRS4 

,FROM 3 ,!,AN>*I/,LIBR>Y4ORG4 

,*RONOLOGY 3 
,JANU>Y #f1 #bba 3 ,*APT] #a -- ,ADD$4 
,JANU>Y #a#g1 #bbb 3 ,*APT] #a -- ,UPDAT$4 

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